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2009-02-25 -Lurid Crime Tales-

Obama Thinks America Invented The Automobile

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Posted by Atomic Conspiracy 2009-02-25 16:59|| || Front Page|| [11139 views ] Top

#1

Well, we did invent the airplane, the misguided claims of foreign jingoists notwithstanding.
The airplane is therefore EVIL, EVIIIILLLLL, automatically so because it is American and especially so since it is used mostly to bomb the innocent and transport fatcat corporate profiteers.

Things you didnt know about American airplanes:

-All terrorism and oppression is a reaction to the Dire Effects of American Bombing
- Pilots are required to kill a fluffy bunny with their bare claws and eat its still-beating heart before they are allowed to graduate from flight school.
-US military pilots must have their guilt centers surgically excised, they are each paid 20 million dollars a year, and they are forced to kill themselves when they reach retirement age.
-Jet fuel is made from the processed body fat of anally electrocuted chinchillas.
-American smart bombs are programmed to seek out petting zoos, kindergartens, and mosques in that order.
-Both Halliburton and Blackwater have aviation divisions. Nuff said.

Posted by Atomic Conspiracy 2009-02-25 17:02|| 2009-02-25 17:02|| Front Page Top

#2 Question, for 15 Obama-bonus points.... Which of the 57 States was it invented in?

Posted by Besoeker 2009-02-25 17:07|| 2009-02-25 17:07|| Front Page Top

#3 Everybody knows that. North Michconsin...

Posted by tu3031 2009-02-25 17:10|| 2009-02-25 17:10|| Front Page Top

#4 hasn't osama branded himself an idiot already?

Posted by rabid whitetail 2009-02-25 17:18|| 2009-02-25 17:18|| Front Page Top

#5 Oh Lord won't you buy me a Mercedes Benz?

Posted by European Conservative 2009-02-25 17:26|| 2009-02-25 17:26|| Front Page Top

#6 Riding along in my YUGO-mobile....

Posted by JosephMendiola 2009-02-25 17:29|| 2009-02-25 17:29|| Front Page Top

#7 actually pilots do kill fluffy bunnies and then eat the entrails or eyeballs during s.e.r.e. creating a puppet from the skin and head is optional though

Posted by Spomoper B. Hayes5111 2009-02-25 17:31|| 2009-02-25 17:31|| Front Page Top

#8 All knowledge comes from Allah; patent holders seize his property.

Posted by Muhammad Googoo 2009-02-25 18:48|| 2009-02-25 18:48|| Front Page Top

#9 While America did not invent the automobile (H Ford didn't invent the assembly line eitehr) we damn well made sure it didn't become something other than a playtoy for the rich.

Everybodyknows that. North Michconsin No that's East Consin

Posted by Cheaderhead 2009-02-25 20:02|| 2009-02-25 20:02|| Front Page Top

#10 Silly Rantburgers ...

He said "the nation that invented the automobile cannot walk away from it", NOT that America invented it.

He's simply making policy for both the US and for Germany. (That's why he gave a speech in Berlin). Would you expect any less of the President of the World? (And the Messiah).

Oh, my leg is tingling again!

Posted by Chris Mathews 2009-02-25 20:17|| 2009-02-25 20:17|| Front Page Top

#11 I've heard saw palmetto helps for that, Mr. Matthews.

Posted by lotp 2009-02-25 21:30|| 2009-02-25 21:30|| Front Page Top

#12 North Michconsin No that's East Consin

Of course. It's a common formulation. In England they have Essex (East Saxons) and Wessex (West Saxon). We in America have East Consin and Wis Consin. It's just a matter of knowing the history of population flows. The Consin tribe migrated to the area hundreds of years ago, and intermarried with the locals. The Wis Consins migrated a bit further when population pressures threatened to overwhelm the ability of the land to support them all. But both subtribes are known for their characteristic, "Yah, ok," and broad vowels to this day.

;-)

Posted by trailing wife">trailing wife 2009-02-25 23:01|| 2009-02-25 23:01|| Front Page Top

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