[Babylon Bee] ATLANTA, GA—Spokespeople for Major League Baseball announced today that the All-Star Game this summer will be moved from Atlanta, due to its egregious voting laws, to a Uyghur prison camp yard, where there aren't any bad voting laws at all.
The game will be held in the spacious prison yard, which features a tall barbed-wire fence and a modest outfield. The venue features lots of free labor, so every role from the ball boys to the concession vendors won't cost the league a dime. In fact, the workers are already happily chalking the baselines and tending the grass, since if they don't, they will be murdered.
"We must move the All-Star game to a place that shares our values," said MLB Commissioner Rob Manfred. "This prison yard is absolutely perfect, and they're giving it to us absolutely free. What a friend we have in Communist China!"
"Most importantly, the prison camp has no ban on early voting, since there is no voting, and no law against giving voters water, since there are no voters. Or water."
This should be one of the most exciting games in recent memory, as any player who fails to stand for the Chinese pledge of allegiance or points to God to thank Him for a great play will be shot on sight.
However, the game will be limited to just three extra innings, as Disney needs the space immediately after to film a documentary on Georgia's bad voting laws.
[BabylonBee] HOUSTON, TX—NASA made a surprise announcement this week: It will cease all missions to the planet Mars. This happened after a number of activists pointed out that Mars completely lacks any early voting, raising the specter that any mission to Mars would support voter suppression.
“We here at NASA are in favor of voting rights,” said NASA director and founder Bob NASA. “And we can’t in good conscience work with a planet that doesn’t embrace those rights.”
[Deadline] Fox News programming of Gutfeld; as the April 5-premiering show is called ; is another example of how the network has been expanding its nighttime doses of opinion, in the post-Donald Trump presidency. Fox Corp. CEO Lachlan Murdoch suggested last month that the job of the network during Joe Biden's presidency would be to act as the loyal opposition, while outlets like Newsmax have made a run for the disaffected Trump voter. I watched this last night and was not impressed. It was basically the same as his afternoon show (with a 10 minute cringe worthy segment on truckers who pee into bottles). I was hoping for some skits with Babylon bee or similar material.
Posted by: Lord Garth ||
04/06/2021 09:21 ||
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#1
Some of his shtick is humorous, but only for 15-20 seconds or so. I am certain he has the intellect and creativity to do much, much more than shallow bites of satire and humor. Don't know what's holding him back. Possibly the network. He and I do share a mutual distain for Juan.
What is the FBI’s main purpose now? Because outside of some great investigative work that gets little national attention, the bureau increasingly seems to be used as a federal weapon aimed primarily at Republicans, generally protecting Democrats while leaking any detail of ongoing investigations that could damage the GOP.
RedState’s Bonchie addressed the problematic aspects of the Times’ recent Gaetz piece:
Really, it should bother everyone, no matter their feelings on Gaetz, that the FBI can just leak something like this, to attack someone in such a blatantly political way. When you are facing an anonymous allegation, you can’t respond to it in any effective manner. Just last night, the reporter behind the Times story appeared on Rachel Maddow’s show and countered Gaetz’s claim about the man he named, yet she did so offering no proof whatsoever. These games are rigged, and you aren’t supposed to be able to defend yourself.
This is the same tactic media outlets took during the FBI’s investigation into whether former President Donald Trump’s 2016 campaign colluded with Russia to "steal" the election. That investigation ultimately found no evidence of such collusion, but that didn’t stop media outlets from publishing thousands of articles over a two-year period featuring quotes from "sources familiar with the matter."
Posted by: Chris ||
04/06/2021 14:16 Comments ||
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#2
Short of lining up reporters, editors, and publishers then executing them pour encourager les autres, I do not see a way to fix the bias and inherent lying in the media, that would be any less violent, impractical, and morally questionable. So don't even suggest it, as tempting as it might be.
Posted by: These Forkbeard7574 ||
04/06/2021 21:33 Comments ||
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#3
Hit em in their credibility and "eyeballs". When their viewership drops off like their credibility, Advertising suffers. Make the advertisers hurt and the "Jornolists" don't get paid
Posted by: Frank G ||
04/06/2021 22:00 Comments ||
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[Epoch via Zero] Supreme Court Justice Clarence Thomas appeared to signal that Big Tech firms could be regulated after Facebook and Twitter suspended President Donald Trump earlier this year. A rare breed of high-placed thinkers who believes Section 230 of the Communications Decency Act may be unconstitutional and possibly illegal.
Thomas, considered a conservative on the high court, made the point during a 12-page submission as the Supreme Court issued an order that rejected a lawsuit over Trump’s blocking of certain Twitter users from commenting on his posts before his account was taken down. The Supreme Court said the lawsuit ultimately should be dismissed as Trump isn’t in office anymore and was blocked from using Twitter, coming after the Second Circuit Court of Appeals had ruled against Trump.
"Today’s digital platforms provide avenues for historically unprecedented amounts of speech, including speech by government actors. Also unprecedented, however, is control of so much speech in the hands of a few private parties," Thomas wrote Monday (pdf).
"We will soon have no choice but to address how our legal doctrines apply to highly concentrated, privately owned information infrastructure such as digital platforms."
Thomas also noted there are arguments suggesting digital platforms such as Twitter or Facebook "are sufficiently akin to common carriers or places of accommodation to be regulated in this manner."
Thomas made reference to the respective owners of Facebook and Google by name—Mark Zuckerberg, Larry Page, and Sergey Brin.
#2
S'OK, they are already making plans to cut off all public utilities to anyone who doesn't vote dem.
Posted by: M. Murcek ||
04/06/2021 8:00 Comments ||
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#3
Oh noes! Jack will post a mean tweet about Justice Thomas
Posted by: Frank G ||
04/06/2021 8:31 Comments ||
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#4
As much as I feel Social Media is Socially and Politically Bias.
Any such SCOTUS ruling must be extremely narrow in focus.
I feel what Social Media sites should be required to do is:
Post and adhere to standards that are equally applied to all "user posted speech" regardless of social, political or opinion content. Of course civil decorum standards should also be established.
I also feel the US Internet Privacy Laws must be updated to allow the user to determine the level of privacy and to ease the removal of collected or posted personal data.
We have HIPPA for medical issues and we should a strong Internet version. Not like the Social Media steered and watered down version for campaign favors and donations that congress passed some years ago.
Otherwise Social Media should forfeit any protections for an E-press under the 1st amendment and be fined and sued as needed like any private company violating a persons civil rights.
#5
These sites are supported by advertisers. They do not charge a fee to the public. They do not provide a vital service. They are excellent at being a place to easily socialize.
The people at the top of the org that developed and runs them are immoral idiots. Trump's approach is the best solution, develope a better alternative. The government taking over these sites via social media regulations is the last thing you want.
#6
regulation would be difficult as FB, for example, is a multi headed beast with some operations being hidden behind multiple layers of camouflage
Posted by: Lord Garth ||
04/06/2021 9:36 Comments ||
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#7
This would be a mess to regulate, drive profits down and give us ways to attack them. I'm all for it. Let let them have to deal with the USG machine!
Posted by: 49 Pan ||
04/06/2021 11:38 Comments ||
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#8
i send an aauuummm to thomas every night.
also to alito and gorsuch.
#9
Don't regulate speech. Just
1) end the 230 giveaway
2) enforce the antitrust laws.
Force Google to divest DBM / DoubleClick and YouTube. Force Facebook to divest Instagram and WhatsApp.
[AmericanThinker] The more our team looked at the 2020 election fraud from publicly available records, the more it appeared to have similar characteristics to property casualty insurance fraud.
Beginning in November, like many citizens, we witnessed election fraud possibilities any sentient person would investigate. Having backgrounds in fraud detection, particularly in the property casualty insurance business, Medicaid fraud, and cyber fraud, gave us a curiosity that never dissipated.
Our interest is 100% in data analysis. That means looking at the actual votes, the addresses, the information about ballots reported to Secretaries of State. While there are all kinds of other fraud, the best way to light it up is with data analysis.
Continued on Page 49
#1
if they have been working as hard as implied and they have the resources they imply and access to actual voting records (I'm not sure they really have much of that), they should have found some real, not hypothetical, cases by now
Posted by: Lord Garth ||
04/06/2021 0:26 Comments ||
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#2
The fact that a few districts can determine the election outcome demonstrates the flaw in the system.
Posted by: M. Murcek ||
04/06/2021 0:33 Comments ||
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#3
Great Gig - Baying at the Moon and being paid for it.
#4
We can go hundreds of layers deeper and it is delivered in the blink of an eye.
Not fast enough. We needed it yesterday. Oh well, maybe they can still put some people in jail.
Posted by: Abu Uluque ||
04/06/2021 12:21 Comments ||
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#5
Can they open-source this data?
Then we could crowd-source and document the (likely) many thousands of cases of 100, 300, 500 or so fraudulent ballots across the nation. This specific, documentary evidence would probably be admissible at trial.
[ENGLISH.AAWSAT] The situation in Jordan wasn’t turbulent, neither in its relations with its neighbors, nor in its relations with its citizens. Jordan allows expressions of differences and opinions, whether through parliament or in the streets. It has overcome several tests in the past.
Absent was the severity of practices adopted by neighboring countries, even if the Jordanian security forces have maintained their power due to their efficiency in collecting information and sensing dangers. Jordan is an image of stability for countries in the region and the world. The ardor of its public has not reached the level of threatening the public system or destabilizing institutions.
Perhaps it is this stable image that led the world to quickly rally around Jordan when its suddenly announced on Saturday night the arrest of prominent figures "for security reasons." Arab and international reactions underscored support for Jordan’s stability and the role of its king in consolidating it. The attention was doubled when official statements on Sunday pointed blame and doubts at former Crown Prince Hamza bin al-Hussein and talked about an attempt to undermine Jordan’s stability. The tense hours endured by Amman demonstrated that stability will prevail and that it is safeguarded by the Jordanians and regional and international community.
Continued on Page 49
Posted by: Fred ||
04/06/2021 00:00 ||
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A multi-volume chronology and reference guide set detailing three years of the Mexican Drug War between 2010 and 2012.
Rantburg.com and borderlandbeat.com correspondent and author Chris Covert presents his first non-fiction work detailing
the drug and gang related violence in Mexico.
Chris gives us Mexican press dispatches of drug and gang war violence
over three years, presented in a multi volume set intended to chronicle the death, violence and mayhem which has
dominated Mexico for six years.
Rantburg was assembled from recycled algorithms in the United States of America. No
trees were destroyed in the production of this weblog. We did hurt some, though. Sorry.
[Babylon Bee] ATLANTA, GA—Spokespeople for Major League Baseball announced today that the All-Star Game this summer will be moved from Atlanta, due to its egregious voting laws, to a Uyghur prison camp yard, where there aren't any bad voting laws at all.
[Daily Wire] By Ashe Schow
[Epoch via Zero] Supreme Court Justice Clarence Thomas appeared to signal that Big Tech firms could be regulated after Facebook and Twitter suspended President Donald Trump earlier this year.
