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2013-03-21 -Short Attention Span Theater-
Massachusetts Principal Cancels Honors Assembly, Too 'Devastating' to Non-Honors Students
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Posted by Beavis 2013-03-21 05:24|| || Front Page|| [11132 views ]  Top

#1 We're all going to get 2 potatoes a day, bacon twice a week and a blade roast twice a year, and we'll be damn happy with it.

You're not happy with it? What's your name?
Posted by Shipman 2013-03-21 09:35||   2013-03-21 09:35|| Front Page Top

#2 Reward failure, punish success. It may not certainly be a recipe for a flourishing society, but it will be one for a 'progressive'* society.

*Per the Official MinTruth Newspeak dictionary progressive is the preferred term in place of regressive.
Posted by Procopius2k 2013-03-21 09:36||   2013-03-21 09:36|| Front Page Top

#3 Are the athletic students made to wear hundred-kilo sacks of birdshot at all times and the ones who can and will pay attention in class made to hear distracting noises every twenty seconds?
Posted by Korora  2013-03-21 09:50||   2013-03-21 09:50|| Front Page Top

#4 "participant" ribbons for all the living and dead schoolchildren. Don't weanna discriminate against the less-animated
Posted by Frank G 2013-03-21 09:56||   2013-03-21 09:56|| Front Page Top

#5 Oh geez, more critical theory nonsense at work.

Someone needs to expunge this man from the education business.

Who is this clown? Was he a classmate of Obambi's??
Posted by Bill Clinton 2013-03-21 10:24||   2013-03-21 10:24|| Front Page Top

#6 In other news Obama ratifies 211th, 212th, and 213th Amendments to the Constitution.
Posted by Bright Pebbles 2013-03-21 10:37||   2013-03-21 10:37|| Front Page Top

#7 Some wealthy person (or business) in that town needs to hold an honors ceremony someplace outside of the school for these kids. Invite them and their families, have a ceremony and heavy hors de oeuvres (sp?) afterward (or even dinner), and specifically disinvite anyone from the school administration.

Maybe even make it an annual affair.
Posted by Barbara 2013-03-21 12:00||   2013-03-21 12:00|| Front Page Top

#8 And name the event in dishonor of the dolt of a principal.
Posted by rjschwarz 2013-03-21 14:46||   2013-03-21 14:46|| Front Page Top

#9 Barb - he'll be branded a 'HATER'.

Korora - I believe the attentive ones would be made to wear headphones delivering a 120db blare every 2 - 12 seconds (randomly) to distract their attention.
And of course the screwoffs will get trophys for 'trying'...

Posted by CrazyFool 2013-03-21 15:24||   2013-03-21 15:24|| Front Page Top

#10 As alluded to by others "Paging Harrison Bergeron to the white courtesy phone."
Posted by AlanC 2013-03-21 15:37||   2013-03-21 15:37|| Front Page Top

#11 Ah Ipswich Mass the very epicenter of Dumbassland kinda doubt the honors class could fill a cafeteria table anyway...
Posted by regular joe 2013-03-21 17:45||   2013-03-21 17:45|| Front Page Top

#12 Actually being from Massaholia (much to my shame) I'm surprised that there was actually anyone NOT on the honors list to start with.

I substitute teach middle school in one of the most upscale, non-PC areas of MA and wouldn't be surprised if all these pampered pets didn't get some kind of award.

As far as that goes most of the kids are good kids still even into 8th grade. But the PC stresses on them are fierce.
Posted by AlanC 2013-03-21 19:59||   2013-03-21 19:59|| Front Page Top

#13 Compromise. "Stupid Kids Night", "Malcontents Night", "Losers Night"...
Everyone gets a night. And a trophy!
Posted by tu3031 2013-03-21 21:29||   2013-03-21 21:29|| Front Page Top

#14 Or..combine them all into one:

We did not cancel honors recognition as erroneously reported on FOX News in Boston. We changed our Honors Night from an exclusive ceremony at night to an all inclusive ceremony during the day with the entire school present. During this ceremony we will honor those who have excelled academically, athletically, in the Arts and in the Related Arts.

So none of you are special. And all of you are special...
Group hug!
Posted by tu3031 2013-03-21 21:39||   2013-03-21 21:39|| Front Page Top

#15 Emotion as an ill compliment to education. Does not compute. Ask a Russian.
Posted by newc 2013-03-21 22:05||   2013-03-21 22:05|| Front Page Top

00:01 JosephMendiola
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23:41 JosephMendiola
23:36 Beavis
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22:45 Chuckles Sforza3984
22:07 Redneck Jim
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21:43 Rambler in Virginia
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