Article

2004-01-07 Iran

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Posted by Fred Pruitt 2004-01-07 00:05|| || Front Page|| [11134 views since 2007-05-07] Top

#1 There's no way a satellite can be ... kosher? It has to be an affront to allah somehow, someway. Unless it's got la bamba on board to drop on the infidel. If they'll tear down buddhas in Afghanistan and cheer, some of the nuttier ones will get upset about a satellite during ramadan.

Posted by 4thInfVet 2004-1-7 12:14:23 AM|| 2004-1-7 12:14:23 AM|| Front Page Top

#2 ...Don't laugh, 4thInfVet...some poor turban got himself fatwa'd once because (and I hope I'm explaining this right) he told a Mullah that astronauts had defecated while on the moon - and since the crescent moon is a symbol of Islam, that statement was de facto blasphemy.

Mike

Posted by Mike Kozlowski 2004-1-7 1:00:58 AM|| 2004-1-7 1:00:58 AM|| Front Page Top

#3 he told a Mullah that astronauts had defecated while on the moon

Ok, honestly, I didn't laugh about that.

Really.

Posted by 4thInfVet 2004-1-7 1:02:17 AM|| 2004-1-7 1:02:17 AM|| Front Page Top

#4 This is no joke dudes !
There's nothing more dangerous than modern
up to date technology in the hands of mentally defective religious fanatics.
would any sane rantburger feel safe knowing
a monkey armed with an AK47 is running amuk on the trees in his back yard ????

Posted by The Dodo 2004-1-7 1:26:53 AM|| 2004-1-7 1:26:53 AM|| Front Page Top

#5 Why don't we encourage this? Let's build it up even more - let's make it a MANNED shot! We can give the Iranians tons of non-military assistance in building an Iranian rocket that can be launched into space with, oh, let's say, 20 people aboard! Let's even use a little reverse psychology and make sure it's all BLACK HAT TURBANTOPS that are "chosen" for the flight! I'm sure every Rantburger will be glad to pitch in a few bucks to see that happen, even!

Of course, we might be a bit clumsy, and forget to tell them how to make sure it gets back DOWN safely, but we'll apologize, I promise!

Posted by Old Patriot 2004-1-7 1:39:21 AM|| [http://users.codenet.net/mweather/default.htm] 2004-1-7 1:39:21 AM|| Front Page Top

#6 To Old Patriot
There's one logical flaw in your otherwise highly recommended plan.
The hafwit turbans will not be able to figger how to bow towards Mecca from a satellite in orbit. They may even wind up with their heads between their legs due to the complexity of orbital mechanics.
Additionally, even the space shuttle does not have enough payload capacity for 20 peaces of 18X18 foot tabrizi heavy duty prayer rugs.
Sorry Old Patriot we will just have to shoot them
to avoid additional SNAFUs with Nassa's Budgetary woes.
P.S.
Great work with the Spirit Mars Rover !!! Thats the way to go !
May Allah bless the American Space Exploration Program.

Posted by The Dodo 2004-1-7 1:58:43 AM|| 2004-1-7 1:58:43 AM|| Front Page Top

#7 OK guys
It's spelled NASA (not NASSA)
I must be getting tired

Posted by The Dodo 2004-1-7 2:01:02 AM|| 2004-1-7 2:01:02 AM|| Front Page Top

#8 IIRC, muslim fundies are much into the conspiracy theory that the moon landings were actually faked. The rationale is there is an hadith about how islam is "going to last until men go to the moon" (that is, forever in the mind of medieval writers). To be specified by someone more fluent with islamic theology that I am.
So, you see, in space, nobody can hear you scream, but there are still blasphemies to be found around by the pious follower of the one true religion.

Posted by Anonymous 2004-1-7 6:30:52 AM|| 2004-1-7 6:30:52 AM|| Front Page Top

#9 OK - some good target practice for our ant-satellite tech...

Posted by Dan 2004-1-7 10:28:31 AM|| 2004-1-7 10:28:31 AM|| Front Page Top

#10 Anyone remember why Sputnik was such an earth-shaking event?

Because, coupled with the Soviet's bomb, it let them threaten the US directly, with little chance for defense: Once you can put a satellite in orbit, you can drop a warhead ANYWHERE.

So, do you think the Iranians view their space program as a way to get to the stars, or a way to get ICBMs?

Posted by Robert Crawford 2004-1-7 11:13:13 AM|| [http://www.kloognome.com] 2004-1-7 11:13:13 AM|| Front Page Top

#11 So the Iranians want to get a space program going, since the Nuke program is getting into rough times, and they can't build a mud building that will stand up to earthquakes. Mullahs, better watch your sixes.

Posted by Alaska Paul 2004-1-7 1:59:27 PM|| 2004-1-7 1:59:27 PM|| Front Page Top

#12 Think about it this way - once again, the Jews beat them in getting to space :P the Star of David beat out the crescent and can be found, on the Israeli flag, on Mars, alongside the name of the late Ilan Ramon :D

Posted by Lu Baihu 2004-1-7 4:37:52 PM|| 2004-1-7 4:37:52 PM|| Front Page Top

#13 Wasn't there protests in the Muddle East around the time of the Apollo Program due the fact that we were defiling the Moon's purity or some such drivel. If the prophesy was that Islam would last till men go to the moon then they sure are dragging their asses about going away

Posted by Cheddarhead 2004-1-7 5:58:30 PM|| 2004-1-7 5:58:30 PM|| Front Page Top

#14 Robert Crawford is right. The mullahs want the capacity to nuke New York, in case the U.S. gets uppity when thay nuke Tel Aviv. This is serious. Time is running out. Deterrence only works when both sides are rational.

Posted by Alan Sullivan 2004-1-7 7:01:51 PM|| [http://bilge.seablogger.com/] 2004-1-7 7:01:51 PM|| Front Page Top

04:31 Scott
04:19 chinditz
04:17 chinditz
23:53 Bomb-a-rama
23:38 Zhang Fei
23:29 Bomb-a-rama
23:17 tu3031
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22:49 tu3031
22:49 NotMike Moore
22:47 Ron in Colorado
22:44 TS
22:44 Fred
22:33 4thInfVet
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22:29 Fred
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22:11 Raj