You're never too young to start acting ridiculous
BERLIN (Reuters) - A nine-year-old German girl was so upset about having to tidy her room she put up a sign in her window urging passers-by to call police for help.
Pedestrians in the central city of Braunschweig saw the girl crying in the window, holding up a sign up saying "Help! Please call the police!" Next to her sat a small boy. Quickly alerted, officers rushed to the scene to discover the girl had argued with her mother about tidying her room and enlisted her two-year-old brother's aid to attract attention.
"The room looked like a battlefield," said a spokesman for local police on Monday. "Officers told the girl to tidy her room. When they came back two hours later to check, it was all cleaned up. And the mother and daughter had made up too." Awww... I love a happy ending.
#3
When my kids were growing up, they always threatened to call Child Protective Services on me if I was "mean" to them. I told them go ahead - it will take at least 10-15 minutes for the cops to arrive, and I can do a lot of damage in that time. If I am going to jail, it won't be for just yelling at them. I will make it worth my while.
A 65-year-old golfer died Tuesday after his golf cart plunged 75 feet off a cliff and crashed into a road below, authorities said. I hate it when that happens.
"I think my ball is over he-e-e-e-e-e-e-r-r-r-e-e-e-e ...."
Edwin Payne teed off with three friends on the second hole of the Pala Mesa Resort Golf Course in northern San Diego County at around 10 a.m. and then got into his cart. The vehicle veered off the concrete pathway, traveled down a 25-foot embankment and went over the edge of the cliff, said California Highway Patrol spokesman Tom Kerns said.
Payne, a recently retired real estate agent from Irvine, was ejected shortly before the cart hit the road beneath the cliff and died on impact, Kerns said. No one else was involved in the crash.
Investigators will inspect the golf cart for mechanical failures, Kerns said. Drugs or alcohol were not thought to have been factors in the crash. Huh? Not drinking on the golf course?
Could have been worse, he could have driven his car up on the sidewalk at a mall ...
#5
We really shouldn't be making fun of this poor guy, but . . . aw, hell! this reminds me of a joke:
Guy comes home from his weekly golf appointment with his buddy Phil in a clearly shaken mood.
"What happened?" his wife asks.
"Phil died."
"Oh, no."
"We were getting ready to tee off on number three when he had a heart attack and just fell to the ground and died right there in front of me."
"Oh! That must have been awful!"
"That was just the beginning. After that, it was: tee off; drag Phil; make the approach shot; drag Phil to the green; hole out; drag Phil to the next tee box; on and on for sixteen holes!"
Posted by: Mike ||
05/23/2007 12:54 Comments ||
Top||
#6
#4 reminds me of:
A couple of guys were playing golf when a funeral procession drove by. One golfer removed his hat and stood at attention until it was past. His buddy said "That was very nice of you." The other guy said "It was the least I could do. We would have been married 45 years next month."
#7
poor copycat of the schmuck that left his rides (car and girlfriend) on the tracks and the Orange Blossom Special turned him into goo and spared the girl... maybe the golf cart isn't a total either....
Granny Feng's tom cat has sprouted two hairy 4ins long wings, reports the Huashang News. "At first, they were just two bumps, but they started to grow quickly, and after a month there were two wings," she said.
Feng, of Xianyang city, Shaanxi province, says the wings, which contain bones, make her pet look like a 'cat angel'. Her explanation is that the cat sprouted the wings after being sexually harassed. It happens, you know.
"A month ago, many female cats in heat came to harass him, and then the wings started to grow," she said. Yeah, I fear that if someday I'm sexually harassed by a pack of supermodels, I might grow wings too. It could happen, that's why I always carry a supermodels-pepper spray repellant.
However, experts say the phenomenon is more likely down to a gene mutation, and say it shouldn't prevent the cat living a normal life. A cat in china, that looks like a chicken. He will be eaten, most likely.
A misplaced candle is believed to have started a fire that caused about $100,000 damage to a bondage and discipline parlour in inner Melbourne. Metropolitan Fire Brigade crews were called to The Correction Centre in St David Street, Fitzroy, just after 10.15pm and contained the fire to a room on the second floor of the two-storey building.
An MFB spokesman said 18 firefighters "were tied up for some time but disciplined and controlled firefighting contained the blaze to one room on the second floor".
The establishment's staff and any clients had evacuated by the time MFB units arrived. No one was injured but much of the upper level was damaged by heat and smoke.
Fitzroy resident Gita Chetty, 23, said she saw smoke coming from the building and two women leave the bondage club. "I saw two women who came out of the centre at the time of the fire - one looked like a receptionist wearing a red silky top and a black skirt and the other woman was wearing a long black jacket and she was wearing lots of make up," she said.
Ms Chetty, who lives nearby, said: "It's pretty low key, although I have noticed the regulars who come by."
The spokesman said a lighted candle was thought to be the cause of the fire. The fire was under control in about 30 minutes, Acting Commander Ala McLean told radio station 3AW. "It was fairly quickly controlled. It was a small fire. Once they gained access into the first floor area it was reasonably quickly extinguished," Mr McLean said. Don't worry, some worthless sub-human dog will be severely punished for this affront.
#1
An MFB spokesman said 18 firefighters "were tied up for some time but disciplined and controlled firefighting contained the blaze to one room on the second floor".
Either our MFB spokesman has a very dry sense of humor or our intrepid reporter is a dunce...
A biting animation about a young girl's life under Iran's ayatollahs screened at Cannes Tuesday despite protests from Tehran of Western bias. "Persepolis", one of 22 films competing for the festival's top award, is based on the eponymous comic-book series by Iranian Marjane Satrapi. "I like the film better than the books," Satrapi told AFP.
The movie offers a child's eye look at Iran from the age of eight, just as the Shah is about to be evicted by the Islamic regime still in place today. And if the critics' enthusiastic response is borne out, the black-and-white feature -- jointly directed by Satrapi and Vincent Paronnaud -- could have a good shot at the coveted Palme d'Or to be awarded Sunday.
Iran has slammed it as "an unreal picture of the outcomes and achievements of the Islamic revolution"
snicker
and protested to France that the festival's decision to select it highlighted "the biased policies of domineering powers."
Continued on Page 49
Only in Islam. With so many mental gymnastics that Muslims must undergo to satisfy the multifarious dictates of halal conduct, you'd think by now they would all be intellectual giants instead of this world's biggest collection of microencephalic psychopaths.
#2
Zen, rather not. The circular and cognitively disonant mental gymnastics one has to endure as halal compliant muslim squeeze out any leftover mental capacity conductive to cognition. For untold multitudes in time and space, it's a trap they are unable to escape.
"For you are like whitewashed tombs which on the outside appear beautiful, but inside they are full of dead men's bones and all uncleanness."
Matt 23:27
#6
It is so tragic that parts of Iran a very civilized and modern, yet they are ruled by primitive thugocrats. It is hard to imagine the anguish of westernized and educated secular Iranians, and people like the upper class Zoroastrians, surrounded by ignorant and murderous brutes.
It is a zoo with the people inside the cages being guarded by animals.
A multi-volume chronology and reference guide set detailing three years of the Mexican Drug War between 2010 and 2012.
Rantburg.com and borderlandbeat.com correspondent and author Chris Covert presents his first non-fiction work detailing
the drug and gang related violence in Mexico.
Chris gives us Mexican press dispatches of drug and gang war violence
over three years, presented in a multi volume set intended to chronicle the death, violence and mayhem which has
dominated Mexico for six years.
Rantburg was assembled from recycled algorithms in the United States of America. No
trees were destroyed in the production of this weblog. We did hurt some, though. Sorry.
Granny Feng's tom cat has sprouted two hairy 4ins long wings, reports the Huashang News. "At first, they were just two bumps, but they started to grow quickly, and after a month there were two wings," she said.
