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2006-10-03 -Lurid Crime Tales-
Muslim youths declare jihad on magic tree. Tree summons police.
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Posted by Thoth 2006-10-03 16:06|| || Front Page|| [11134 views since 2007-05-07]  Top

#1 "Wonder how they'd feel if I can take a whack at the black rock to disprove its' magic abilities."

My understanding is that that has happened inthe past, which is why it is in pieces now....
Posted by Mark E. 2006-10-03 16:38||   2006-10-03 16:38|| Front Page Top

#2 If you touch the tree your wanker will fall off.
Posted by bigjim-ky 2006-10-03 17:25||   2006-10-03 17:25|| Front Page Top

#3 A more subtle, and very effective curse is:

If you touch the tree you will have trouble with erections.

Sufficiently vague, greatly alarming ... they will spend hours secretly wondering if the curse had affected them yet and of course, in some cases, it will as a result of the worry.
Posted by lotp 2006-10-03 17:31||   2006-10-03 17:31|| Front Page Top

#4 If you touch the tree your sister will marry a Baptist.
Posted by Besoeker 2006-10-03 17:32||   2006-10-03 17:32|| Front Page Top

#5 "It is not a matter of chopping down the tree but this is to counter a popular belief such as if (we) touch it, (we) will get sick or your cleaver will break."

Heh. Never heard that one before...

Posted by Dave D.">Dave D.  2006-10-03 17:51||   2006-10-03 17:51|| Front Page Top

#6 Is that why Ward and June named him Beaver, aka the Beav?
Posted by Nimble Spemble 2006-10-03 17:58||   2006-10-03 17:58|| Front Page Top

#7 And there's absolutely no truth to the rumor that the tree was an NBA star who ticked off a witch doctor and was turned into a tree mid court.
Posted by Anonymoose 2006-10-03 19:01||   2006-10-03 19:01|| Front Page Top

#8 Infidel tree. It must submit to the power of Islam's little wankers.
Posted by Thinemp Whimble2412 2006-10-03 19:49||   2006-10-03 19:49|| Front Page Top

#9 Oh, if only these people weren't homicidal psychopaths, these stories would be hilarious...
Posted by tu3031 2006-10-03 20:17||   2006-10-03 20:17|| Front Page Top

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