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2006-09-28 -Short Attention Span Theater-
Norway: Boys told no standing to urinate
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Posted by Super Hose 2006-09-28 11:17|| || Front Page|| [11123 views since 2007-05-07]  Top

#1 Slide down to:
This reminds me of a joke.
This guy comes into a bar...
...walks to the bartender and says...
..." Bartender, I got a bet for you.
I'll bet you $ ..
Posted by 3dc 2006-09-28 11:55||   2006-09-28 11:55|| Front Page Top

#2 And yet, once they were vikings.
Posted by anonymous5089 2006-09-28 11:56||   2006-09-28 11:56|| Front Page Top

#3 Seems God was just about done creating the universe, but he had two extra things left in his bag of creations, so he decided to split them between Adam and Eve. He told the couple that one of the things he had to give away was the ability to stand up while urinating.

"It's a very handy thing," God told the couple, who he found under an apple tree. "I was wondering if either one of you wanted that ability."

Before God had a chance to explain any further, Adam jumped up and blurted, "Oh, give that to me! I'd love to, please, oh please, oh please, let me have that ability, It'd be so great! When I'm working in the garden or naming the animals. I could just stand there and let it fly. It'd be so cool, I could write my name in the sand. Oh please God, let it be me who you give that gift to, let me stand and pee, oh please..." Adam went on and on like an excited little boy who had to pee.

Eve just smiled and told God that if Adam really wanted that so badly, that he should have it. It seemed to be the sort of thing that would make him happy and she really wouldn't mind if Adam were the one given this ability.

And so Adam was given the ability to control the direction of his misdirection while in a vertical position. And so, he was happy and did celebrate by wetting down the bark on the tree nearest him, laughing with delight all the while. And it was good.

"Fine," God said, looking back into his bag of leftover gifts, "What's left here? Oh yes, Multiple orgasms..."
Posted by BrerRabbit 2006-09-28 12:09||   2006-09-28 12:09|| Front Page Top

#4 This really pi**es me off!!

(Thanks for the underhand lob Super Hose.)
Posted by GORT 2006-09-28 12:23||   2006-09-28 12:23|| Front Page Top

#5 Reminds me of a sign over a urinal at Ft Rucker seen long ago:

"Those with short stacks or low manifold pressure must move closer to the target."
Posted by RWV 2006-09-28 15:45||   2006-09-28 15:45|| Front Page Top

#6 Rucker?!!? A whirlybirdyman!
Posted by .com 2006-09-28 16:11||   2006-09-28 16:11|| Front Page Top

#7 Rucker! That's down home! The one I saw read, "We aim to please. You aim too, please".
Posted by Deacon Blues 2006-09-28 16:21||   2006-09-28 16:21|| Front Page Top

#8 I used to love hearing the Dothan Cab Co call come through the headset in the tower... Lol.
Posted by .com 2006-09-28 16:28||   2006-09-28 16:28|| Front Page Top

#9 Come, let us go to Dothan. The Peanut Capitol of the World.I once saw a chinook land in a watermelon field and the crew got some watermelons. They would carry 105 Howitzers, old airplanes, and Hueys around.
Posted by Deacon Blues 2006-09-28 16:44||   2006-09-28 16:44|| Front Page Top

#10 Sitzpinkler.
Posted by Seafarious">Seafarious  2006-09-28 17:05||   2006-09-28 17:05|| Front Page Top

#11 And whose bright idea was it to have unisex restrooms in a school?

One without urinals?



Posted by john 2006-09-28 17:11||   2006-09-28 17:11|| Front Page Top

#12 When I first saw the headline I thought this was due to muslim pressure to confrom with islamic practices (squatting to urinate in the manner of the prophet)

Posted by john 2006-09-28 17:21||   2006-09-28 17:21|| Front Page Top

#13 It is Makrooh (disliked) in Shari'ah for a person to stand and urinate without any valid excuse. In the situation mentioned herein, it is a question of doubt that you are not sure whether the seat is clean or not. To eradicate the doubt, you may clean the toilet seat with toilet paper.

It is makruh to urinate standing upright because it is more afdal for Muslim men to squat down while urinating. The azab in the grave also awaits men who do not wash after urinating. Wallahualam.
Posted by john 2006-09-28 17:25||   2006-09-28 17:25|| Front Page Top

#14 When in doubt, wudu.
Posted by Seafarious">Seafarious  2006-09-28 17:28||   2006-09-28 17:28|| Front Page Top

#15 John I've seen this myself..been in the middle of the Sahara with rag heads and they would squat to piss while I did it the normal way standing.
Posted by RD 2006-09-28 17:47||   2006-09-28 17:47|| Front Page Top

#16 Only a EUrocrat would try to tell someone how they have to piss. What's next, how you must wipe? Front to back, or back to front?
Posted by Whaiter Angoth6452 2006-09-28 17:47||   2006-09-28 17:47|| Front Page Top

#17 How the hell can one write "allah" while squatting?
Posted by ed 2006-09-28 17:49||   2006-09-28 17:49|| Front Page Top

#18 To a male, the entire world is an urinal .. a tree, a bush, a pond, a river, the sea, the side of the road, the middle of the road, it makes no difference. We have the equipment to handle all such situations.

And we stand up...
Posted by john 2006-09-28 19:16||   2006-09-28 19:16|| Front Page Top

#19 And I thought it had something to do with the invention of beer.
And when you get really old, you can't piss until you zip up your fly.
Posted by wxjames 2006-09-28 20:06||   2006-09-28 20:06|| Front Page Top

#20 ...been in the middle of the Sahara with rag heads and they would squat to piss while I did it the normal way standing.

Next you're going to tell me they prefer doggie style.
Posted by  KBK 2006-09-28 20:32||   2006-09-28 20:32|| Front Page Top

#21 To a male, the entire world is an urinal .. a tree, a bush, a pond, a river, the sea, the side of the road, the middle of the road, it makes no difference. We have the equipment to handle all such situations.

Same thing is true of my female dogs. And your point is?????
Posted by dog fancier 2006-09-28 20:49||   2006-09-28 20:49|| Front Page Top

#22 I stand...because I can!
Posted by tu3031 2006-09-28 21:01||   2006-09-28 21:01|| Front Page Top

#23 Today's question: how big a trade-off is opposable thumbs (humans), giving the ability to open doors (ht to Farside) and operate power tools vs the Dog's ability to lick themselves? Discuss amongst yourselves
Posted by Frank G 2006-09-28 21:11||   2006-09-28 21:11|| Front Page Top

#24 It's better to be pi$$ed off than pi$$ed on.
Posted by Alaska Paul">Alaska Paul  2006-09-28 21:18||   2006-09-28 21:18|| Front Page Top

#25 Discuss amongst yourselves

No, don't. Enough, already.
Posted by lotp 2006-09-28 21:49||   2006-09-28 21:49|| Front Page Top

#26 LOL
Posted by Frank G 2006-09-28 22:15||   2006-09-28 22:15|| Front Page Top

#27  Only a EUrocrat would try to tell someone how they have to piss. What's next, how you must wipe? Front to back, or back to front? Nah, Star Trek style circling Uranus looking for Klingons
Posted by Cheaderhead 2006-09-28 22:40||   2006-09-28 22:40|| Front Page Top

23:37 Zenster
23:32 JosephMendiola
23:29 gorb
23:23 Zenster
23:20 Mike
23:19 gorb
23:19 Zenster
23:17 DMFD
23:15 gorb
23:15 Mike
23:09 Zenster
23:03 Ol Dirty American
23:03 Zenster
23:00 Captain America
22:59 gorb
22:59 Zenster
22:59 Pappy
22:59 Classical_Liberal
22:55 gromgoru
22:54 Super Hose
22:50 gromgoru
22:49 Zenster
22:47 Frank G
22:46 gromgoru









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