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2010-09-24 -Lurid Crime Tales-

Man Arrested After Fight With Pet Parrott

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Posted by Snoluger Uleregum1468 2010-09-24 00:00|| || Front Page|| [11123 views ] Top

#1 Perhaps he was shagged out after a prolonged squawk.

Posted by no mo uro 2010-09-24 05:21|| 2010-09-24 05:21|| Front Page Top

#2 Was he charged with domesticated violence?

Posted by Procopius2k 2010-09-24 08:48|| 2010-09-24 08:48|| Front Page Top

#3 Beat me to it P2K. Most likely PETA will get involved. I had a friend who had a parrot. They can be fairly testy. This bird would bend down from his shoulder and pluck the buttons off his shirt. Occasionally the bird would defecate on his shoulder. Maybe the problem was that the bird was a male named Lucy.

Posted by JohnQC 2010-09-24 09:22|| 2010-09-24 09:22|| Front Page Top

#4 Instead of fighting with the parrot he should have done the following:

A young man named Jon received a parrot as a gift.

The parrot had a bad attitude and an even worse vocabulary.

Every word out of the bird's mouth was rude, obnoxious and laced with profanity.

Jon tried and tried to change the bird's attitude by consistently saying only polite words, playing soft music and anything else he could think of to "clean up" the bird's vocabulary.

Finally Jon was fed up and he yelled at the parrot.

The parrot yelled back.

Jon shook the parrot and the parrot got even angrier and more rude.

Jon in desperation, threw up his hands and grabbed the bird and put him in the freezer.

For a few minutes the parrot squawked and kicked and screamed.

Then, suddenly there was total quiet, not a peep was heard.

Fearing that he had hurt the parrot, Jon quickly opened the door to the freezer.

The parrot calmly stepped out onto Jon's outstretched arm and said "I believe I may have offended you with my rude language and actions."

"I am sincerely remorseful for any inappropriate transgressions."

"I fully intend to do everything I can do to correct my rude and unforgivable behavior".

Jon was stunned at the change in the bird's attitude.

He was about to ask the parrot why he had made such a dramatic change in his behavior, but the bird continued... "May I ask what the turkey did?"

Posted by JohnQC 2010-09-24 09:28|| 2010-09-24 09:28|| Front Page Top

#5 I worked at an office in the early 80s where the office flaming gay guy and the VP hated each others guts.
The VP bought this huge $10K cockatiel that squawked all the time.
After a week of this the "flaming" guy started staying real late every night...
One night I had to stay pretty late and I saw him in the VPs office playing with the cockatiel and feeding it every few seconds...
I asked what he was up to. He said watch...
say for me "Herb Sxcks". The bird said it....

A few days later there was a major meeting with the Prez, VP and a major Chicago law group....

The Prez said "Herb has a..."
and the cockatiel started up...

The meeting ended very badly...
The bird was given away by the end of the week..
No birds ever appeared at the workplace again.

I asked the "flaming guy" how he kept his job...
He responded. I know where the VP keeps a bachelor pad (his wife didn't know about) and have full financial records and some hidden photos.. I will never be fired...
He was about 6 years later when the VP's wife lost interest in him...

Posted by Water Modem 2010-09-24 10:04|| 2010-09-24 10:04|| Front Page Top

#6 one of the tuned google ads on the side ..
"Parrot Training 101"
100's of Tips to Fix Your Parrot's Worst Behavior Problems. Free Video
www.BirdTricks.com

They are getting pretty good with that localized tuning.

Posted by Water Modem 2010-09-24 10:06|| 2010-09-24 10:06|| Front Page Top

#7 That's a good story, Water.

Posted by Ebbang Uluque6305 2010-09-24 15:33|| 2010-09-24 15:33|| Front Page Top

23:38 Frank G
23:30 rjschwarz
23:29 trailing wife
23:27 trailing wife
23:23 Ding a dang ding
23:18 trailing wife
23:12 Barbara Skolaut
23:11 CrazyFool
23:10 Procopius2k
23:09 Gaz
23:02 Redneck Jim
23:02 Old Patriot
22:57 JosephMendiola
22:54 Swamp Blondie
22:50 tipper
22:47 Redneck Jim
22:45 JosephMendiola
22:35 Frank G
22:27 Steve White
22:26 JosephMendiola
22:15 Redneck Jim
22:12 JosephMendiola
22:02 OldSpook
21:58 OldSpook