Article

2005-04-11 -Short Attention Span Theater-

Antichrist Sends Naked Man to Kill Suburbanite - Plot Fails - Would-Be Assassin Arrested

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Posted by BigEd 2005-04-11 4:46:31 AM|| || Front Page|| [11126 views since 2007-05-07] Top

#1 Hmm, I think the Antichrist needs to review his hiring policies.

Posted by Jonathan 2005-04-11 8:06:25 AM|| [http://www.emessell.typepad.com/muddling] 2005-04-11 8:06:25 AM|| Front Page Top

#2 This seems quite odd. A 45 y/o awakes and subdues an armed intruder less than half his age that was standing over him. Our intruder seems to have been a rather passive fellow. Besides the whole armed breaking & entering thing I mean.

Posted by Dave 2005-04-11 8:58:15 AM|| 2005-04-11 8:58:15 AM|| Front Page Top

#3 Oh. I thought this was "Nuggets from the Urdu Press"...

Posted by tu3031 2005-04-11 9:04:09 AM|| 2005-04-11 9:04:09 AM|| Front Page Top

#4 I doubt there's a Charlie Manson wannabee somewhere out there sending dinks like Macias on nude kill missions. This guy is probably just a whack job living out some fantasy -- or looking for 3 squares a day and video game time in a mental facility.

Posted by .com 2005-04-11 9:19:25 AM|| 2005-04-11 9:19:25 AM|| Front Page Top

#5 A Richard Ramirez, the Night Stalker, wannabe?

Posted by ed 2005-04-11 9:37:25 AM|| 2005-04-11 9:37:25 AM|| Front Page Top

#6 "looking for 3 squares a day and video game time"
He must be a fan of Grand Theft au naturel.

Posted by Gleaper Cleregum9549 2005-04-11 9:47:42 AM|| 2005-04-11 9:47:42 AM|| Front Page Top

#7 You just can't get good help these days....

Posted by Mr 666 2005-04-11 9:57:07 AM|| 2005-04-11 9:57:07 AM|| Front Page Top

#8 like the Antichrist can't make $1 Million dollars bail.

Posted by Frank G 2005-04-11 10:22:58 AM|| 2005-04-11 10:22:58 AM|| Front Page Top

#9 Naked Coed Ninja Assassination would look good on a t-shirt.

Posted by BH 2005-04-11 10:24:09 AM|| 2005-04-11 10:24:09 AM|| Front Page Top

#10 "Subdued"? Had it been my dwelling, there's a good chance the guy wouldn't have escaped the encounter in good health.

Posted by Bomb-a-rama 2005-04-11 11:12:03 AM|| 2005-04-11 11:12:03 AM|| Front Page Top

#11 B-a-R's post made me realize it may be time to make Judge Greer into a verb...

"I greered his naked ass with my Louisville Slugger, a Roger Maris Signature, so he's on life support, now. The kid got a coupla shots in, too. I'm proud of his slugging average."

Posted by .com 2005-04-11 11:15:56 AM|| 2005-04-11 11:15:56 AM|| Front Page Top

#12 "There are one million stories in the naked city, . . ."

Posted by Mike 2005-04-11 11:17:49 AM|| 2005-04-11 11:17:49 AM|| Front Page Top

#13 "I greered his naked ass with my Louisville Slugger,..

In my case, since I play recreational hockey, I managed to keep a lot of the wooden stix I broke, and trimmed them a little. I can either swing the stick like a baby Slugger, or I can hold both ends and administer a cross-check to whatever body part is closest. :)

Posted by Bomb-a-rama 2005-04-11 4:11:00 PM|| 2005-04-11 4:11:00 PM|| Front Page Top

#14 or I can hold both ends and administer a cross-check to whatever body part is closest.

I can show you some cross-checking...

Posted by John Wensink 2005-04-11 4:33:54 PM|| 2005-04-11 4:33:54 PM|| Front Page Top

#15 Just guessing, of course, but I'll bet the homeowner, being a guy, went for the knife hand in the struggle.

I'd have gone for a different body part....

(What did you say, Mr. Naked Guy? C'mon, squeak up! ;-p)

Posted by Barbara Skolaut 2005-04-11 6:02:41 PM|| 2005-04-11 6:02:41 PM|| Front Page Top

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