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2005-02-15 -Short Attention Span Theater-
Females flown in to p-p-p-pick up 'gay' penguins
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Posted by Steve White 2005-02-15 12:00:35 AM|| || Front Page|| [11134 views since 2007-05-07]  Top

#1 Did they fly the penguins in on the CIA's ghost plane, ready to strut their stuff and flaunt their femalian feathers in front of the helpless Zoo prisoners?

Welcome to Alberto Gonzales' Amerikkka Bremerhaven Zoo 'n' Torture Lab...
Posted by Seafarious  2005-02-15 12:20:22 AM||   2005-02-15 12:20:22 AM|| Front Page Top

#2 I nearly fell off my chair laughing at this (the gays and lesbians protesting).
Posted by phil_b 2005-02-15 12:42:07 AM||   2005-02-15 12:42:07 AM|| Front Page Top

#3 Sheesh. Amazing. Instead of studying whether homosexuality exists, the host of idiotic zoophillic assumptions are legion and inane, perhaps they should study whether there are stupid animals. Y'know, the ones that skipped Health 101, for instance.

A bona-fide Wank-o-Matic Winner.
Posted by .com 2005-02-15 11:13:27 AM||   2005-02-15 11:13:27 AM|| Front Page Top

#4 Not that there's anything wrong with it...
Posted by Jerry Seinfeld 2005-02-15 12:48:50 PM||   2005-02-15 12:48:50 PM|| Front Page Top

#5 Are the enclosures a little too tastefully done? Is it too neat? Do the penguins in question know more than 5 recipes?
Posted by Shipman 2005-02-15 12:52:02 PM||   2005-02-15 12:52:02 PM|| Front Page Top

#6 I need money to do a study on why Gus the Goose, a new resident at the Deacon Blues Pork Palace and Potbles Parlour, has a thing for Buddy the Dog. They are both male so I need LOTS of money to do a study on cross-species homosexuality.
Posted by Deacon Blues  2005-02-15 1:03:37 PM||   2005-02-15 1:03:37 PM|| Front Page Top

#7 DB - Lol! That's too broad - I have at least 50 images that qualify as an editorial comment! ;-)
Posted by .com 2005-02-15 1:14:14 PM||   2005-02-15 1:14:14 PM|| Front Page Top

#8 "...spent months sitting on a stone instead of an egg..."
Ms Kück didn't know the sexes of her penguins and didn't remove the stone? What is this -- don't ask, don't tell?
Posted by Tom 2005-02-15 1:15:33 PM||   2005-02-15 1:15:33 PM|| Front Page Top

#9 More like "don't have a clue".
Posted by Pappy 2005-02-15 1:34:02 PM||   2005-02-15 1:34:02 PM|| Front Page Top

#10 The zoo imported the penguins from Sweden last month after finding through DNA tests that three of their five existing pairs were all male.

Three all male pairs?

Not discovered until DNA tests?

Either vets are incompetent, "things" are quite small, or both...
Posted by BigEd 2005-02-15 1:40:23 PM||   2005-02-15 1:40:23 PM|| Front Page Top

#11 .com, I think DB's point is that there are no broads ... of any species... involved in his little situation.
Posted by trailing wife 2005-02-15 3:39:23 PM||   2005-02-15 3:39:23 PM|| Front Page Top

#12 Yoo-hoo...Gay Penguin...Yoo-hoo!
Posted by Cheap Slutty Penguin 2005-02-15 3:43:51 PM||   2005-02-15 3:43:51 PM|| Front Page Top

#13 Tw, right. I have to find Gus a girlfriend, it really freaks out the dog. Gus follows him all over the barnyard and even tries to get in the dog bed with him. Connie the Short Bus Lady and I sit out on the front porch with a cooler of beer and watch the show. Real cheap intertainment. I'll be traveling to a farm a few miles away this weekend to find Gus a female goose. I'll look for the one with the biggest honkers.
Posted by Deacon Blues  2005-02-15 3:54:30 PM||   2005-02-15 3:54:30 PM|| Front Page Top

#14 The zoo had been mystified why its endangered Humboldt penguins had failed to breed, until they realised the males had paired off to watch the Oscars.
Posted by Uleper Hupains4886 2005-02-15 4:03:10 PM||   2005-02-15 4:03:10 PM|| Front Page Top

#15 Gus is not alone in his confusion and amorous intentions...

This bunny has decided to do the cat. Period.
Posted by .com 2005-02-15 4:18:51 PM||   2005-02-15 4:18:51 PM|| Front Page Top

#16  I'll look for the one with the biggest honkers.

LOL. Ahem... they'd be falsies tho.
Posted by Shipman 2005-02-15 4:30:01 PM||   2005-02-15 4:30:01 PM|| Front Page Top

#17 The other clue was the fact that the penguins all had press credentials from Talon News Service....
Posted by Seafarious  2005-02-15 4:43:42 PM||   2005-02-15 4:43:42 PM|| Front Page Top

#18 One of my former techs worked at the Broolkfield Zoo. Her job there: sexing penguins. As it turns out, no, you can't just pick them up and look at their bottoms, because externally they're identical. They keep the business parts hidden inside so as to be better streamlined for swimming (e.g., evading leopard seals). So you have to draw blood and do DNA testing to sex them.
Posted by Steve White  2005-02-15 5:43:54 PM||   2005-02-15 5:43:54 PM|| Front Page Top

#19 Leopard seals make us all shrivel.
Posted by George the Penguin 2005-02-15 6:11:27 PM||   2005-02-15 6:11:27 PM|| Front Page Top

#20 They keep the business parts hidden inside so as to be better streamlined for swimming

If I spent half my life standing on an Antarctic ice shelf, with my legs an inch and a half long, I wouldn't fancy having my tackle hanging out either.
Posted by Bulldog  2005-02-15 6:37:09 PM||   2005-02-15 6:37:09 PM|| Front Page Top

#21 The linux take on this issue...
(h/t to 3dc, heh)
Posted by .com 2005-02-15 10:54:26 PM||   2005-02-15 10:54:26 PM|| Front Page Top

18:02 trailing wife
18:02 trailing wife
23:59 3dc
23:54 3dc
23:54 jackal
23:10 Mark Z.
23:09 Barbara Skolaut
23:05 .com
23:04 Barbara Skolaut
23:02 Barbara Skolaut
23:00 Alaska Paul
22:59 Barbara Skolaut
22:58 Barbara Skolaut
22:54 .com
22:53 AJackson
22:51 DMFD
22:50 IToldYouSo
22:49 2b
22:48 DMFD
22:47 Frank G
22:45 Doc8404
22:43 CrazyFool
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22:25 Ray









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