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2011-01-04 -Short Attention Span Theater-
Literary corner: Highlights from Snooki's new book
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Posted by ryuge 2011-01-04 00:00|| || Front Page|| [11131 views ]  Top

#1 "Yum. Johnny Hulk tasted like fresh gorilla."

I...speechless...speechless.
Posted by tu3031 2011-01-04 00:04||   2011-01-04 00:04|| Front Page Top

#2 Fade to STUPID

It starts out stupid. I doubt there are words that adequately describe what it fades to.
Posted by gorb 2011-01-04 00:41||   2011-01-04 00:41|| Front Page Top

#3 I don't even wanna know how she knows what fresh gorilla tastes like.
Posted by Swamp Blondie 2011-01-04 01:40||   2011-01-04 01:40|| Front Page Top

#4 "Gia danced around a little, shaking her peaches for show. She shook it hard. Too hard. In the middle of a shimmy, her stomach cramped. A fart slipped out. A loud one. And stinky."

Please...read on, Alistair.
Posted by tu3031 2011-01-04 01:51||   2011-01-04 01:51|| Front Page Top

#5 Intriguing. She has a way with words.
Posted by Grunter 2011-01-04 07:49||   2011-01-04 07:49|| Front Page Top

#6 whom or what is Snooki?
Posted by Water Modem 2011-01-04 08:05||   2011-01-04 08:05|| Front Page Top

#7 wonder who's going to read it to her
Posted by Frank G 2011-01-04 09:52||   2011-01-04 09:52|| Front Page Top

#8 Did she coin the word badonk or has it been around a while? Will I get sinktrapped for using it on Rantburg?
Posted by Ebbang Uluque6305 2011-01-04 12:16||   2011-01-04 12:16|| Front Page Top

#9 It's times like these when I'm grateful that i live overseas and have no fucking idea who "snooky" is. Really, I give thanks.
Posted by gromky 2011-01-04 12:28||   2011-01-04 12:28|| Front Page Top

#10 EU6305,
That phrase has been around long enough not only is it out of style here in the sticks, there is a c'ntry song which uses the term as its title/theme.

Search badonkadonk if you are curious, or consider yourself bliss and snooker as unhip.

gromky, do give thanks. At my exposure level the only remaining remedy is shoving pins in my fingernails, shoving my hands in fine salt, then throwing tequila in my eyes.

Frank G, thats some funny stuff there.
Posted by swksvolFF 2011-01-04 13:31||   2011-01-04 13:31|| Front Page Top

#11 If she didn't have a pulse, you would swear she was inflatable...
Posted by tu3031 2011-01-04 13:46||   2011-01-04 13:46|| Front Page Top

#12 I don't know who Snooki is, either. I do remember Baby Snooks, a character created by Fanny Brice.
Posted by Deacon Blues 2011-01-04 16:23||   2011-01-04 16:23|| Front Page Top

#13 Sorry, Deacon. Not even close...
Posted by tu3031 2011-01-04 16:30||   2011-01-04 16:30|| Front Page Top

#14 Anything to do with..... Snooker?
Posted by Besoeker 2011-01-04 16:32||   2011-01-04 16:32|| Front Page Top

#15 Similar, but the pockets are much larger.

Interestingly, I was looking through my outdoors catalog and there was a fish bait called dadonka donk.
Posted by swksvolFF 2011-01-04 16:42||   2011-01-04 16:42|| Front Page Top

#16 Yeah. Her snooker's right down there next to her badonk.
Posted by tu3031 2011-01-04 16:54||   2011-01-04 16:54|| Front Page Top

#17 whom or what is Snooki?
Not Snooki.
Not Snooki.
Snooki!
Posted by ryuge 2011-01-04 16:57||   2011-01-04 16:57|| Front Page Top

#18 #15 Similar, but the pockets are much larger.
Posted by: swksvolFF

Larger pockets would help, but my eye is not as steady as it once was. My cue stick is a bit shakey as well. I'd probably just..... scratch.
Posted by Besoeker 2011-01-04 17:04||   2011-01-04 17:04|| Front Page Top

#19 She should wed MMA slap-head, Forrest Griffin. Imagine the DNA mix.
Posted by Shemp Fluck6002 2011-01-04 17:48||   2011-01-04 17:48|| Front Page Top

#20 IIUC in playing snooki, once you put your cue ball in a pocket everything afterwards should be considered scratching. Even though the border of the gametable is dominated by the pockets, or game parlance "holes", rather than the traditional game consisting mostly of bumpers, or in snooki parlance "gutter", the winning strategy is to attempt to jump the cue ball off of the table and past other players without being caught - like in cricket - or putting any game objects into the "holes".
Posted by swksvolFF 2011-01-04 18:25||   2011-01-04 18:25|| Front Page Top

#21 I think there's someone called snooki in some TV show on some channel I never watch (and have probably never heard of).

If I do understand who she is, I wonder who's going to read the book to her fans.
Posted by Barbara Skolaut 2011-01-04 19:29||   2011-01-04 19:29|| Front Page Top

#22 26 pound fox and a, what, 150 pound manatee. Must be a slow news day.
Posted by KBK 2011-01-04 20:03||   2011-01-04 20:03|| Front Page Top

23:49 tu3031
23:46 Gravise Hatrack7365
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