Article

2024-11-05 Home Front: Politix

Titania McGrath: If Donald Trump wins, it's over

[The Critic] It's delicious satire, as always, by TM
The imminent US election has been a constant source of anxiety for me. The prospect of a literal fascist returning to the White House has triggered my self-diagnosed PTSD. I haven’t been this distressed since my niece spat out the puberty blockers I smuggled into her rusks.

Donald Trump has consistently sown division and hatred. In this election campaign there have been three assassination attempts against Trump, thereby proving irrefutably that he is guilty of inciting violence.

If Trump continues to speak in public, no doubt more innocent people will be goaded into attempting to shoot him, thereby putting themselves in danger of being killed by the security services. This is reckless behaviour.

Trump’s connections to fascism are easily proven. For instance, his second wife was Marla Maples, who was born in the town of Cohutta in Georgia. Cohutta is an anagram of "Taco Hut", which is a conflation of Taco Bell and Pizza Hut. These are both examples of popular restaurants. It is in restaurants that one often finds sausages. The country most associated with sausages is Germany. And Germany was the home of the Third Reich.

Arguably, matters are even worse here in the UK. In July’s general election, I was put in an impossible position. I was never going to vote for a straight white male in the form of Keir Starmer, but the ethnic minority candidate was Rishi Sunak, an evil Tory. In the end, I spoiled my ballot by drawing a huge X in the box next to Sunak’s name. It was a small protest, but it felt good.

Kamala Harris is now the only hope for America. She is both mixed-race and female, which is far more important than "charisma" or "competence". She is half-Indian and half-Jamaican, which means that she is even more oppressed than Barack Obama. And let’s not forget that Obama’s mother was white, which always meant he was 50 per cent problematic.

If Trump wins, I don’t think I will be able to cope. In fact, if he is elected again, I will be suing anyone who votes for him as compensation for my trauma. You have been warned.

Posted by Frank G 2024-11-05 08:01|| || Front Page|| [11138 views ] Top

#1 who the hell is "Titania McGrath"????

Posted by Spomort Grumble4916 2024-11-05 09:10|| 2024-11-05 09:10|| Front Page Top

#2 A spoofed persona - it's actually a Brit male comedian

Posted by Frank G 2024-11-05 09:14|| 2024-11-05 09:14|| Front Page Top

#3 Spomort Grumble4916 satire.

Posted by Deacon Blues 2024-11-05 10:03|| 2024-11-05 10:03|| Front Page Top

#4 We live in an age in which it is no longer possible to be funny. There is nothing you can imagine, no matter how ludicrous, that will not promptly be enacted before your very eyes, probably by someone well known.
-- Malcolm Muggeridge

We're in a Schroedinger's Cat universe - is this funny or stupid? Without outside cues or some way to open the box, you can't tell if something is hilarious parody or the stupidest thing anyone ever said.

tl;dr: I laffed

Posted by SteveS 2024-11-05 12:02|| 2024-11-05 12:02|| Front Page Top

#5 M. Stanton Evans liked to say that “There is no absurdity that you can invent that a liberal will not state seriously.”

Posted by Deacon Blues 2024-11-05 14:09|| 2024-11-05 14:09|| Front Page Top

#6 Titania delivered one of the funniest lines this century: "I could be the modern day Rosa Parks -- except I wouldn't be caught dead on mass transit."

Posted by Regular joe 2024-11-05 14:12|| 2024-11-05 14:12|| Front Page Top

#7 Titania was really funny about 5 years ago when it was obviously an exaggeration of leftards

since then the leftards have gone further and further and its not that much of an exaggeration anymore

Posted by Lord Garth 2024-11-05 16:59|| 2024-11-05 16:59|| Front Page Top

#8 ^ The Babylon Bee nods in agreement: "Our job becomes harder"

Posted by Frank G 2024-11-05 19:00|| 2024-11-05 19:00|| Front Page Top

16:05 swksvolFF
15:26 Procopius2k
15:23 NN2N1
14:59 Pancho Poodle8452
14:52 Rambler
14:51 Grom the Affective
14:41 Elmerert Hupens2660
14:31 Regular joe
14:28 trailing wife
14:25 magpie
14:18 Elmerert Hupens2660
14:14 Regular joe
14:10 Super Hose
14:08 Super Hose
14:08 Regular joe
14:02 Super Hose
14:01 trailing wife
14:01 trailing wife
13:58 trailing wife
13:56 Super Hose
13:54 trailing wife
13:51 Super Hose
13:44 Elmerert Hupens2660
13:22 Difar Dave