Article

2023-12-07 -Great Cultural Revolution

Public Educators Warn Low Literacy Rates May Prevent Kids From Reading About Gay Sex

[Bee] WASHINGTON, D.C. — Recent reports shining a harsh light on illiteracy among public school students have sparked concern among public educators. Public school teachers and their unions are warning that high illiteracy rates may prevent kids from reading about gay sex.

"What's the point of sneaking books about gay sex into public schools if the kids are unable to read them?" said Secretary of Education Miguel Cardona to a concerned group of public school teachers. "So many books about kink, fetishes, and bestiality are going to waste without being consumed by young readers. This is a travesty."

Randi Weingarten of the American Federation of Teachers issued a similar warning, stating emphatically that "As the legal guardians of America's youngest generations, it is up to us to teach kids how to read furry-themed porn written by Marxist transbian xey/xems."

At publishing time, President Biden had downplayed concerns over American illiteracy among schoolkids, reminding the public that "I can't read neither."

Posted by Frank G 2023-12-07 00:00|| || Front Page|| [10325 views ] Top
File under: Mob Rule

#1 "So many books about kink, fetishes, and bestiality are going to waste without being consumed by young readers. This is a travesty."

The upside of...uhm, ah...

Posted by Skidmark 2023-12-07 00:35|| 2023-12-07 00:35|| Front Page Top

#2 I thought they were mostly picture books.

Posted by Super Hose 2023-12-07 10:44|| 2023-12-07 10:44|| Front Page Top

Posted by Jack Creanter7508 2023-12-07 10:57|| 2023-12-07 10:57|| Front Page Top

#4 A headline when your odds are better in roux-lette than Bee/Not Bee.

Posted by swksvolFF 2023-12-07 11:41|| 2023-12-07 11:41|| Front Page Top

#5 Always bet on whack.

Posted by Super Hose 2023-12-07 11:43|| 2023-12-07 11:43|| Front Page Top

#6 I thought they were mostly picture books.

That's why they are so lathered about unisex bathrooms / locker rooms. That's where the practicums will be held.

Posted by M. Murcek 2023-12-07 11:44|| 2023-12-07 11:44|| Front Page Top

#7 Again I appreciate being told up front that this is the Babylon Bee. For today, anyway.

Posted by Tom 2023-12-07 13:31|| 2023-12-07 13:31|| Front Page Top

#8 "Tomorrow's News, Today"

Posted by swksvolFF 2023-12-07 22:39|| 2023-12-07 22:39|| Front Page Top

08:27 Skidmark
08:26 Skidmark
08:16 Skidmark
08:12 Skidmark
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07:39 Jack+Creanter7508
07:39 Gluson
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01:03 Grom the Affective