Article

2023-05-15 Government Corruption

Biden Heads To Beach House To Recuperate After Grueling 5-Hour Work Week

[BEE] REHOBOTH, DE — President Biden has retired for the weekend to his beach house in Delaware, enjoying a well-deserved rest after working a brutal five hours over this past week.

"President Biden has simply run himself ragged in service to our county," Press Secretary Karine Jean-Pierre told the press. "He showed off his incredible, youthful vigor by putting in an astounding five hours of work this week, marking a four-hour increase from previous weeks. Biden will need an extended break at his beach house to recover from the strain."

Biden's accomplishments over the past week ranged from staring blankly at members of the press corps while they shouted questions, reading reporters' questions to them from cards he'd been given in advance, sharing folksy anecdotes about how much his dad loved the gays back in 19-dickety-2, and telling people without legs not to jump. Sources close to the president said they haven't seen him this energetic since a shampoo factory opened down the street from his beach house. "It's remarkable," a presidential aide remarked. "He started working after lunch, then plowed right through his post-lunch nap. One day he worked all the way to 2:30! The guy's a machine."

At publishing time, citizens across the nation were waiting in rapt anticipation to see just how much damage Biden could do next week with just a few hours of work.

Posted by Besoeker 2023-05-15 01:07|| || Front Page|| [11132 views ] Top

#1 Biden heads to beach as DHS forces employees to work weekend at the border

Posted by Skidmark 2023-05-15 10:45|| 2023-05-15 10:45|| Front Page Top

#2 The border is 'much better than you all expected. Ha ha ha': Biden laughs off Title 42 chaos during trip to his beach house - as migrants are given court dates 10 YEARS after crossing and processing centers burst at the seams

Posted by Skidmark 2023-05-15 10:55|| 2023-05-15 10:55|| Front Page Top

#3 Shocking footage lays bare US migrant crisis after end of Title 42 as El Paso processing center is bursting at the seams with SIX TIMES its max capacity - while a THIRD busload is dropped off outside Kamala Harris' DC home

Posted by Skidmark 2023-05-15 11:06|| 2023-05-15 11:06|| Front Page Top

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