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2020-09-26 -Short Attention Span Theater-

Ninth Circuit Court Overturns Death Of Ruth Bader Ginsburg

[Babylon Bee] SAN FRANCISCO, CA—In a landmark ruling, the Ninth Circuit Court of Appeals has overturned the death of Supreme Court Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg. In a close decision, the judges on the court have ruled RBG's death unconstitutional and will block Trump from nominating a replacement.

Kim McLane Wardlaw, the judge who issued the ruling, said in a statement: "Justice Ginsburg's death was an affront to the constitution as well as our God-given right to abort as many babies as possible and sell their body parts for research. Death, at its core, is a construct designed to subvert the rule of law by taking pro-choice liberal judges away from us too soon. We cannot allow Ruth Bader Ginsburg's death to stand. By law, she will now be considered to be still alive."

Trump slammed the ruling as "idiotic" and called the court judges "a bunch of morons." Republicans pounced on this ruling like tigers that pounce on their prey before ruthlessly tearing it to pieces with their razor-sharp claws. "This is a terrible ruling because we're racist and we hate women," said a bunch of Republicans, according to anonymous sources.

Judge Wardlaw followed up on her ruling, saying: "We hereby rule any attempt by President Trump to appoint a replacement to be unconstitutional. We will block any attempt until we figure out a way to resurrect her or maybe clone her and restore her to her already 'legally alive' state. We're still figuring that part out."

Posted by Besoeker 2020-09-26 08:13|| || Front Page|| [16 views ] Top

#1 Yeah, it's the Bee, but you know it's not completely unpossible. They would if they could.

Posted by SteveS 2020-09-26 09:54|| 2020-09-26 09:54|| Front Page Top

#2 Thanks to President Trump and Senate Judiciary chair Mitch McConnell, the 9th circuit is nearly balanced — at least at the appeals level —resulting in a much reduced stupidity quota.

Posted by trailing wife 2020-09-26 10:12|| 2020-09-26 10:12|| Front Page Top

#3 "One of these days the 9th Circuit will rule the Constitution unconstitutional".

-- Thomas Sowell

Posted by Dopey Spomons1756 2020-09-26 11:34|| 2020-09-26 11:34|| Front Page Top

#4 She'll still be voting by mail this year.

Posted by Cesare 2020-09-26 11:49|| 2020-09-26 11:49|| Front Page Top

#5 Thanks to President Trump and Senate Judiciary chair Mitch McConnell, the 9th circuit is nearly balanced

It's 13R to 16D with 10 Trump appointees. Of interest, should Trump win a second term, there are 9 current judges in their 70's, all but two of which are D appointees.

Posted by Iblis 2020-09-26 13:33|| 2020-09-26 13:33|| Front Page Top

#6 Thanks to President Trump and Senate Judiciary chair Mitch McConnell, the 9th circuit is nearly balanced

It's not a matter of "balance". Anything other than a constitutionalist judge is wrong.

Posted by gorb 2020-09-26 22:56|| 2020-09-26 22:56|| Front Page Top

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