Article

2020-05-12 -Short Attention Span Theater-

Texans Put 'Welcome To Texas' Signs Around Oklahoma So Californians Will Move There Instead

[Babylon Bee] OKLAHOMA—Clever Texans have implemented a new strategy to stop Californians from fleeing their terrible state and ruining Texas with the same policies. Sneaking up to Oklahoma in the middle of the night, brave defenders of the Lone Star State installed "Welcome to Texas" signs atop the "Welcome to Oklahoma" signs surrounding Texas's neighbor.

Californians, whose minds have been slowed from years of marijuana, sushi, and the patchouli of hippies, won't be smart enough to notice the difference and will settle down in Oklahoma, not realizing they moved to the wrong state.

"It's the perfect plan," said Texas Governor Greg Abbott. "While I don't condone vandalism or vigilantism, we must sometimes take desperate measures to ensure dumb Californians don't keep coming here and destroying everything."

Oklahomans, annoyed by their new Californian neighbors constantly saying "dude" and "bro," have hatched a plot to move the Welcome to Texas signs to Nebraska.

Posted by Besoeker 2020-05-12 06:55|| || Front Page|| [11130 views ] Top

#1 *Snork!* Knew it was Bee, but it still is funny.

Posted by magpie 2020-05-12 10:31|| 2020-05-12 10:31|| Front Page Top

#2 Good stuff.
Better if you understand the regional rivalries; very tough but very friendly.

Posted by swksvolFF 2020-05-12 11:06|| 2020-05-12 11:06|| Front Page Top

#3 /\ Local Rivalry... *Snicker* Does the Red River Bridge War(1931) count? IIRC, the legal conclusion of this is that the Texas/Oklahoma border is on the south bank of the Red River, not down the middle as is the usual boundary between states.

Posted by magpie 2020-05-12 12:39|| 2020-05-12 12:39|| Front Page Top

#4 Send them to Baltimore or Detroit.

Posted by Iblis 2020-05-12 12:42|| 2020-05-12 12:42|| Front Page Top

#5 Not so friendly back then, for sure.

Goes back to Civil War, though not as famous as the Red River Campaign in Arkansas, Honey Springs was important.

Posted by swksvolFF 2020-05-12 13:02|| 2020-05-12 13:02|| Front Page Top

#6 Better idea: Get some bouys in the middle of the Pacific and string that sign along them.

Two birds, one stone.

Posted by charger 2020-05-12 16:08|| 2020-05-12 16:08|| Front Page Top

18:19 Angstrom
17:48 49 Pan
17:38 Lord Garth
17:29 alanc
17:09 BrerRabbit
16:13 Pancho Poodle8452
16:08 Beavis
16:08 Lord Garth
15:52 Lord Garth
15:28 trailing wife
15:26 Pancho Poodle8452
15:26 trailing wife
14:34 Frank G
14:28 Melancholic
14:27 NoMoreBS
14:14 swksvolFF
14:12 swksvolFF
13:54 mossomo
13:51 mossomo
13:50 NoMoreBS
13:50 Abu Uluque
13:44 Abu Uluque
13:41 NoMoreBS
13:39 Abu Uluque