Article

2019-05-07 -Short Attention Span Theater-

NC woman allegedly trespasses at CIA, asks to speak to 'Agent Penis'

[WashingtonExaminer] A woman was arrested this week after trying four separate times to sneak into the Central Intelligence Agency headquarters in northern Virginia to speak to "Agent Penis."

The criminal complaint described the May 3 incident involving Jennifer G. Hernandez, 58, from North Carolina: "Upon arrival, the defendant provided her Iowa identification card, requested to recover her North Carolina identification card, and requested to speak to Agent Penis."

After a review of records, Officer Mirko Peña who was not "Agent Penis" determined that "CIA police officers had encountered the defendant on several recent occasions, and had cited her for trespassing on the prior evening." Her last three appearances had been on consecutive days.

Hernandez was charged with criminal trespassing in the United States District Court for the Eastern District of Virginia. She is currently being held in Alexandria city jail.

The CIA has not revealed the true identity of "Agent Penis."

Posted by Woodrow 2019-05-07 01:42|| || Front Page|| [11132 views ] Top

#1 Pretty sure I met him once. He's kinda of a dick.

Posted by Bangkok Billy 2019-05-07 04:06|| 2019-05-07 04:06|| Front Page Top

#2 'Peter' Strzok?
No, wrong building.

Posted by Skidmark 2019-05-07 04:34|| 2019-05-07 04:34|| Front Page Top

#3 ...With God as my witness, I have no idea what to say next.

Mike

Posted by Mike Kozlowski 2019-05-07 04:45|| 2019-05-07 04:45|| Front Page Top

#4 Carlos Danger didn't work for the CIA did he?

Posted by AlanC 2019-05-07 07:42|| 2019-05-07 07:42|| Front Page Top

#5 NC? Iowa?

I'm pretty sure Florida figures prominently in her itinerary...

Posted by Ulirt Guelph5709 2019-05-07 09:18|| 2019-05-07 09:18|| Front Page Top

#6 Agent Penis doesn't work for the CIA anymore. He is a private dick now.

Posted by DarthVader 2019-05-07 09:32|| 2019-05-07 09:32|| Front Page Top

#7 The Agency will have to pick up the child support.

Posted by Fred 2019-05-07 09:55|| 2019-05-07 09:55|| Front Page Top

#8 Sounds like some kind of initiation:
"Your mission, if you choose to accept it, is to sneak into CIA headquarters and locate Agent Penis. If you are successful, you will be given your ID badge and a decoder ring."

Posted by SteveS 2019-05-07 11:30|| 2019-05-07 11:30|| Front Page Top

#9 Looking for the head dick head, John O. Brennan.

Posted by Woodrow 2019-05-07 12:59|| 2019-05-07 12:59|| Front Page Top

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