 Featuring all the old favorites. Like "masked gunmen"!
On Saturday, 21 May 2011, two masked gunmen shot and killed 'Omar Hilwan in Beit Dajan village near the northern West Bank city of Nablus. This attack is another incident of violence resulting from the state of lawlessness and weapons proliferation plaguing the occupied Palestinian territory (OPT).
So how many does that make? Nah. Just kidding. Don't freak out...
According to an investigation conducted by the Palestinian Center for Human Rights (PCHR), including eyewitnesses' testimonies, at approximately 08:15 on Saturday, 21 May 2011, two masked gunmen shot and killed Omar Hussein Abu Hilwan, 32, in the center of Beit Dajan village, northeast of Nablus. He was hit with several bullets. The attackers then fled the scene.
Yeah, they'll usually do that...
PCHR strongly condemns this crime, and calls upon the Attorney General's office to conduct a thorough investigation and bring the perpetrators to justice.
We'll try, but we're pretty backed up thanks to you do-gooders always asking for all these investigations. I'm suprised we get anything done.
Up next, "Accidental Discharges From Mishandled Weapons"!
On Wednesday morning, 18 May 2011, Intissar Abu Rabei', from the northern Gaza Strip town of Beit Lahia, was killed by a bullet, which accidentally discharged from a gun that her child mishandled.
Whaddya mean we're outta Twinkies, bitch!
According to an investigation conducted by the Palestinian Center for Human Rights (PCHR), at approximately 09:30 on Wednesday, 18 May 2011, Intissar Mohammed Abu Rabei', 41, from Beit Lahia, was admitted into Kamal 'Edwan Hospital in the town after she was wounded by a bullet that hit her face and ended lodged in her chest.
Hmmmmmmmm. Kid fire from a grassy knoll maybe?
According to medical sources, she was in critical condition when she arrived, so she was transferred to Shifa Hospital in Gaza City.
Whaddya think, doc?
Well, it's not a foot wound, so I can't help her. Better take her to Shifa. Maybe somebody over there knows what they're doing.
Medical efforts to save her life failed and she was pronounced dead in that afternoon.
Mahmoud, call those bastids over at Kamal 'Edwan and tell them thanks for making us look bad.
According to Palestinian police sources, the bullet that hit Abu Rabei' was fired from a gun which was mishandled by her 15-year-old child. The gun belongs to the child's father who is a police officer.
And a damn fine one I'll bet...
Jeebus! 15 year-old kid "accidently" shot and killed their own mother. If true, and if the rascal weren't a raving nutter already, I can confidently predict total craziness in their near future.
...and, finally a twofer. "Masked gunmen" and "family disputes"!
At approximately 21:30 on Tuesday, 17 May 2011, masked gunmen opened fire at Saif Majed Abu Zakkar, 20, when he was near a grocery shop near his house in Block "H" in al-Shaboura refugee camp in Rafah. He was wounded by several bullets throughout the body.
Hey, Saif. We been looking for youze!
Oh, shit! It's the "Masked Gunmen"!
BANGBANGBANGBANGBANG...
People in the area transported him to Martyr Abu Yousef al-Najjar Hospital in Rafah.
Ummmmmmm...can ya take me somewhere else?
According to medical sources, Abu Zakkar was in a serious condition, so he was transferred to the European Gaza Hospital in Khan Yunis.
Thanks, guys..
Palestinian police sources stated that an investigation was opened into the attack, which they think was motivated by an old family dispute.
Important tip to remember, Mahmoud. Never get in a dispute with the Masked Gunmen family. They got long memories...
PCHR is deeply concerned over increasing casualties resulting from the misuse of weapons
...as we always are
which is part of the state of security chaos and proliferation of weapons prevailing in the Occupied Palestinian Territory.
I can almost hear Marvin Gaye singing "Make Me Wanna Holler"...
PCHR calls upon the Public Prosecution to seriously investigate such incidents and bring the perpetrators to justice.
Hey! Ya think we don't? 
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