Everybody take notes...
An Allen Township man accused of driving drunk wore a Coors Light sweatshirt to court today and offered a novel defense. The law doesn't apply to him, Scott A. Witmer said, because he is a "sovereign man."
Coors Light sweatshirt? Nice touch...
"It means I live inside myself," Witmer, 44, told a curious Northampton County Judge Leonard Zito. "I don't live in the state of Pennsylvania."
Really? So I guess the voices in your head are your neighbors?
Witmer was arrested by state police early Aug. 24 after he allegedly drove drunk from his 1309 Adams St. home after troopers responded to a domestic violence call. Police also charged him with several summary offenses and said he did not have insurance for his vehicle, lacked valid license plates, and was driving on a revoked license.
I guess he didn't issue one to himself. And I'd love to see the motto on the plates...
Accompanying Witmer's legal position was a 20-page motion he submitted in December in which he insisted the charges against him were unconstitutional. In the filing, he served notice on the court that to rule otherwise would be a "blatant act of TYRANNY," and akin to "committing acts of treason, usurpation and tyranny."
I may be crazy, but I'm not crazy about jail.
Witmer's claims brought raised eyebrows in the courtroom and concerns from Zito. The judge asked public defender James Connell to represent Witmer in a bail hearing held about an hour later in which he increased bail, causing Witmer to be led out of court in handcuffs.
Wanna slap the bracelets on Sovereign Man, Muldoon?
"I'm alarmed that you may be a danger to yourself or our community," Zito said.
Or your community, on whatever planet that may be today.
Zito ordered Witmer to undergo a psychological examination, which didn't phase the defendant, who said, "I'm not insane" and "I'm not crazy. I've already had five of those done on me in prison," Witmer said of the examinations. "It's no big deal."
Oh I'm sure it's not. But humor us, okay?
Witmer had been free on unsecured bail. Zito set the new amount at $25,000, with $2,500 needed for release.
Free advice, Scott? Next time, wear a suit. And say "yes, sir" and "no, sir".
Connell said Witmer intends to challenge his stop by state police, and will be filing a motion to that effect. Witmer appeared to offer a similar stance during the bail hearing, saying "that's not a true statement" when Zito repeated his earlier claim of sovereignty.
Must've been a revolution in his head.
In court filings, police alleged that an intoxicated Witmer cursed at them and had trouble standing after troopers were called to his home because of an argument with his girlfriend. Police said they told Witmer not to drive as they were leaving. While they were parked doing paperwork, Witmer drove past them, allegedly failing to stop at a stop sign, and many times crossing the center line. He refused a blood alcohol test, police said.
But I'll bet he's the brightest bulb in Sovereign Man Land... 
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