Article

2007-07-26 Home Front: Culture Wars

Lawsuits could be putting "Ladies' Nights" in Bars Across the Country on the Rocks.

Lawsuits could be putting "Ladies' Nights" at bars and clubs across the country on the rocks. In about two dozen cases, plaintiffs contend these drink and admission deals for women constitute discrimination against men and should be banned.

Roy Den Hollander is a ~~spoilsport~~ New York lawyer who ~~hasn't been laid in a good long while~~ says Ladies' Night drinks and admission specials are unconstitutional, and he says he's suffered personally.

"C'mon, please!?"
"No! Get lost, creep!"

Hollander is also a graduate of Columbia Business School and seems like a guy who should be able to get into a decent bar and afford the drinks. So what irks him?

"I'm tired of having my rights violated and being treated as a second-class citizen," said Hollander, who is seeking class-action status for his suit in federal court.

Whiny git. I bet he still uses Clearosil.

Tim Gleason, general manager of the China Club in New York, calls Hollander's complaint "pathetic" and echoes other club owners who argue that the discounts actually help both sexes by balancing out the ratio between men and women. Nevermind that some men are more than happy to pay for inequality in the ratio department.

Over the last 30 years, lawsuits stemming from promotions involving Ladies' Night have enjoyed considerable success in courts across the country where judges have held that single-sex discounts violate state and federal statutes guaranteeing equal protection under the law.

George Washington University law professor John Banzhaf, whose students have brought a Ladies' Night suit, says that these promotions are part of a broader class of gender-based price discrimination tactics like those used by hairdressers and dry cleaners who charge men and women different prices for the same service. In Washington, D.C., he hopes to pursue what he calls restroom equity or "squatter's rights" in which he will sue public venues whose restroom availability, though seemingly equal for both sexes, has a "disparate impact" on women who must deal with longer lines and wait times.

Posted by JohnQC 2007-07-26 00:00|| || Front Page|| [11133 views ] Top

#1 Next thing you know they'll sue gay bars for discriminating against straight folks

Posted by badanov 2007-07-26 00:26|| http://www.freefirezone.org]">[http://www.freefirezone.org] 2007-07-26 00:26|| Front Page Top

#2 And the feeling's right ... oh what a night NOT in late December back in '63.

Posted by JosephMendiola 2007-07-26 01:15|| 2007-07-26 01:15|| Front Page Top

#3 Lawyers ____________________________.

/use your imagination.

Posted by RD ">RD 2007-07-26 01:17|| 2007-07-26 01:17|| Front Page Top

#4 ATTORNEY: Are you sexually active?
WITNESS: No, I just lie there.
________________________________

ATTORNEY: What is your date of birth?
WITNESS: July 18th.
ATTORNEY: What year?
WITNESS: Every year.
_____________________________________

ATTORNEY: What gear were you in at the moment of the impact?
WITNESS: Gucci sweats and Reeboks.
______________________________________

ATTORNEY: This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory at all?
WITNESS: Yes.
ATTORNEY: And in what ways does it affect your memory?
WITNESS: I forget.
ATTORNEY: You forget? Can you give us an example of something you forgot?
_____________________________________

ATTORNEY: How old is your son, the one living with you?
WITNESS: Thirty-eight or thirty-five, I can't remember which.
ATTORNEY: How long has he lived with you?
WITNESS: Forty-five years.
_____________________________________

ATTORNEY: What was the first thing your husband said to you that morning?
WITNESS: He said, "Where am I, Cathy?"
ATTORNEY: And why did that upset you?
WITNESS: My name is Susan.
_____________________________________

ATTORNEY: Do you know if your daughter has ever been involved in voodoo?
WITNESS: We both do.
ATTORNEY: Voodoo?
WITNESS: We do.
ATTORNEY: You do?
WITNESS: Yes, voodoo.
_____________________________________

ATTORNEY: Now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his sleep, he doesn't know about it until the next morning?
WITNESS: Did you actually pass the bar exam?
_____________________________________

ATTORNEY: The youngest son, the twenty-year-old, how old is he?
WITNESS: Uh, he's twenty-one.
_____________________________________

ATTORNEY: Were you present when your picture was taken?
WITNESS: Would you repeat the question?
______________________________________

ATTORNEY: So the date of conception (of the baby) was August 8th?
WITNESS: Yes.
ATTORNEY: And what were you doing at that time?
WITNESS: Uh....
______________________________________

ATTORNEY: She had three children, right?
WITNESS: Yes.
ATTORNEY: How many were boys?
WITNESS: None.
ATTORNEY: Were there any girls?
______________________________________

ATTORNEY: How was your first marriage terminated?
WITNESS: By death.
ATTORNEY: And by whose death was it terminated?
______________________________________

ATTORNEY: Can you describe the individual?
WITNESS: He was about medium height and had a beard.
ATTORNEY: Was this a male or a female?
______________________________________

ATTORNEY: Is your appearance here this morning
pursuant to a deposition notice which I sent to your attorney?
WITNESS: No, this is how I dress when I go to work.
______________________________________

ATTORNEY: Doctor, how many of your autopsies have you performed on dead people?
WITNESS: All my autopsies are performed on dead people.
______________________________________

ATTORNEY: ALL your responses MUST be oral, OK? What school did you go to?
WITNESS: Oral.
______________________________________

ATTORNEY: Do you recall the time that you examined the body?
WITNESS: The autopsy started around 8:30 p.m.
ATTORNEY: And Mr. Denton was dead at the time?
WITNESS: No, he was sitting on the table wondering why I was doing an autopsy on him!
______________________________________

ATTORNEY: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: Did you check for blood pressure?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: Did you check for breathing?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: So, then it is possible that the patient
was alive when you began the autopsy?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: How can you be so sure, Doctor?
WITNESS: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.
ATTORNEY: But could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless?
WITNESS: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law

Posted by zazz 2007-07-26 02:19|| 2007-07-26 02:19|| Front Page Top

#5 Maybe Hollander should go after false advertising. There are not many "ladies" in bars, and there are no "gentlemen" in a gentlemen's club.

Of course, if he would just do a little more drinking, he would not get so peeved about things.

Posted by whatadeal 2007-07-26 02:45|| 2007-07-26 02:45|| Front Page Top

#6 Feh. Welcome to the Kalifornia Sausage Factory, we've been staring at our shoes for years.

Posted by ArmChair in sin 2007-07-26 06:05|| 2007-07-26 06:05|| Front Page Top

#7 Ladies night is to get the men laid, asshat. Stop screwing it up for the rest of us because you have the pickup lines of a brain-dead morlock and don't get squat.

Posted by DarthVader">DarthVader 2007-07-26 10:41|| 2007-07-26 10:41|| Front Page Top

#8 To carry on with the theme started by zazz above, I was a witness to the following cross examination in a municipal court case. The Defendant was charged with driving under the influence of alcohol. The arresting officer was a "heavy set" female:

Defense Attorney: On direct examination you testified my client called you a FAT, UGLY, PIG when you placed him under arrest, correct?

Officer: Yes, he did.

Defense Attorney: Which part of my client's statement, if any, did you disagree with?

Prosecutor: Objection. Argumentative !

Judge: Sustained....

**************************************************

Now I'll give equal time to a police officer's great comeback to a defense attorney's question:

Q: "Officer -- did you see my client fleeing the scene?"

A: "No sir. But I subsequently observed a person matching the description of the offender, running several blocks away."

Q: "Officer -- who provided this description?"

A: "The officer who responded to the scene."

Q: "A fellow officer provided the description of this so-called offender. Do you trust your fellow officers?"

A: "Yes, sir. With my life."

Q: "With your life? Let me ask you this then officer. Do you have a room where you change your clothes in preparation for your daily duties?"

A: "Yes sir, we do!"

Q: "And do you have a locker in the room?"

A: "Yes sir, I do."

Q: "And do you have a lock on your locker?"

A: "Yes sir."

Q: "Now why is it, officer, if you trust your fellow officers with your life, you find it necessary to lock your locker in a room you share with these same officers?"

A: "You see, sir -- we share the building with the court complex, and sometimes lawyers have been known to walk through that room."

Great comeback.....

Posted by Mark Z">Mark Z 2007-07-26 12:22|| 2007-07-26 12:22|| Front Page Top

#9 No further questions, your honor...

Posted by tu3031 2007-07-26 12:38|| 2007-07-26 12:38|| Front Page Top

#10 Roy Den Hollander is a spoilsport New York lawyer who hasn't been laid in a good long while says Ladies' Night drinks and admission specials are unconstitutional, and he says he's suffered personally.

This putz has obviously never fished or heard of stocking a pond....

Posted by Pliny Flunter1136 2007-07-26 14:28|| 2007-07-26 14:28|| Front Page Top

#11 What's the big deal? Only men show up on Ladies' Night anyway.

Posted by Dar">Dar 2007-07-26 15:49|| 2007-07-26 15:49|| Front Page Top

#12 My favorite:

Lawyer: Did you say the victim was shot in the woods?

Witness: No, I said he was shot in the lumbar region.

Posted by Abdominal Snowman 2007-07-26 21:35|| 2007-07-26 21:35|| Front Page Top

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