Article

2005-11-12 Home Front: Culture Wars

H/T to an engineer buddy in The Magic Kingdom who shall remain nameless, lol... Keep your head down bro, heh.
Abstract:
Among a fringe community of paranoids, aluminum helmets serve as the protective measure of choice against invasive radio signals. We investigate the efficacy of three aluminum helmet designs on a sample group of four individuals. Using a $250,000 network analyser, we find that although on average all helmets attenuate invasive radio frequencies in either directions (either emanating from an outside source, or emanating from the cranium of the subject), certain frequencies are in fact greatly amplified. These amplified frequencies coincide with radio bands reserved for government use according to the Federal Communication Commission (FCC). Statistical evidence suggests the use of helmets may in fact enhance the government's invasive abilities. We speculate that the government may in fact have started the helmet craze for this reason.
Written with tongue firmly planted in cheek. See the article for pix and much more, lol.

Posted by .com 2005-11-12 03:49|| || Front Page|| [11136 views since 2007-05-07] Top

#1 how do I invest in these? Sure, they are useless - but offered at $19.99, with a 100% satisfaction guarantee (and some other freebie if ordered now) these could net me some serious cash.

Posted by 2b 2005-11-12 04:36|| 2005-11-12 04:36|| Front Page Top

#2 I will forward this to the Pres of the Tin Hat society, Barb Streisand, and let her know the tests went even further and now we can read their dirty little minds. How dare she have those nasty sexy thoughts about our commander in chief!

Posted by 49 pan">49 pan 2005-11-12 09:00|| 2005-11-12 09:00|| Front Page Top

#3 I suspect that the commonality of the mental illness that responds to the "tin foil hat" remedy is more than coincidence. There seems to be several standard motifs in such wackiness, and those individuals, as often as not, come to the same conclusions about preventative measures.

Another often shared delusion is the use of the "paper clip chain grounding device", in which they literally wear a paper clip chain that drags behind them, to "ground" themselves.

Posted by Anonymoose 2005-11-12 09:44|| 2005-11-12 09:44|| Front Page Top

#4 Rats! They're on to us!

Posted by Atomic Conspiracy 2005-11-12 10:01|| 2005-11-12 10:01|| Front Page Top

#5 It's a trap! Foil hats only work against orbiting CIA satellites. True conspiracy theorists know Halliburton beams mind control rays from the earth's core which is reflected and concentrated by the hats onto the pituitary gland, the brain's master control center. The only way to prevent this is to also wear the foil diaper.

Posted by ed 2005-11-12 10:25|| 2005-11-12 10:25|| Front Page Top

#6 You forgot the use of low-frequency sonar by the Navy. Remember: NSA used to be a Naval agency and they have their own secret programs too.

Better wear foil earmuffs. Or roll foil into a Faraday cage and walk around inside it 24/7.

Posted by lotp 2005-11-12 10:36|| 2005-11-12 10:36|| Front Page Top

#7 Or roll foil into a Faraday cage and walk around inside it 24/7.

Isn't that what hamsters do? ;-)

Posted by trailing wife 2005-11-12 20:28|| 2005-11-12 20:28|| Front Page Top

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