[Babylon Bee] U.S.—With Epstein’s infamous assistant Ghislaine Maxwell awaiting trial and testimony in prison, many celebrities, politicians, and entertainment industry elites are rushing to make pedophilia generally acceptable before they’re outed as patrons of Epstein’s notorious island.
"I’m not going to lie, this is going to be an uphill climb," said actor and director Rudy Allan, "but it’s absolutely necessary in order to prevent the entire world from seeing us as depraved perverts. Well, actually, I guess we don’t mind that so much as we just want depravity and perversion to be considered completely valid sexual orientations. I mean, we’re pretty much there already, just have to check off one last box."
According to Allan, the movement is gaining unprecedented cooperation from across industries and international political positions. From an unnamed prince in a small country off the coast of France, to fashion industry moguls, to famous musicians and actors, the push to make pedophilia mainstream is gaining traction.
"The gay rights movement took 30-40 years, but the transgender movement really only took about 5-10 years," said a hopeful former US President from Arkansas who preferred to remain anonymous. "At that rate, we should be able to make this thing happen by the end of the year!"
"Honestly, the timing couldn’t be better," says Oscar-winning actor Kelvin Smacey. "If this whole Epstein Island thing had come out before we had fully integrated things like transgender children and Drag Queen Story Hour into mainstream values, we’d be totally doomed. Nowadays, we’ve got so many letters crammed into the whole ’LGBTQETC+’ thing, nobody even notices if we slide a ’P’ in there somewhere!"
In addition to those subtle changes, the ramp-up includes bolder strategies, such as a California proposal that will make it okay for 22-year-olds to have relations with 13-year-olds, a new streaming series about an 11-year-old girl defying her family’s outdated traditions by dancing sensually, or simply tweeting pro-pedo slogans like "love has no age" from popular drag queen associations.
While the momentum has recently increased, Allan says they’ve been laying down the groundwork for decades.
"I mean, we’ve got award-winning movies and shows featuring minors in sexual situations," Allan says. "We’ve got drag shows for toddlers, school curriculum developed to get children thinking about exploring their sexuality really early on, and clothing lines designed to show off their bodies. We’ve implemented various strategies to reduce parental influence and protection over their children by weakening the family structure and encouraging promiscuity. And that’s not even mentioning abortion. Like, once you’re okay with casually slaughtering babies by the millions, how is anyone going to take issue with objectifying kids?"
According to Allan, next steps include Kidnapper Story Hour at the library, human sacrifices at public schools, a competitive reality TV series called Six-Year-Old Strippers, and outlawing millstones within 40 miles of any large body of water.
#3
Bee is getting.... ambiguous. Twice in two days I've been caught reading a "real" article only to find it's the Bee. Isn't satire supposed to be obvious?
#6
There are some Bee articles that are so obvious I can pick them out from the headline. There are some that I need to read almost the whole article to get it.
I do check the source whenever the article seems a little off.
Posted by: Rambler in Virginia ||
08/23/2020 15:31 Comments ||
Top||
[Washington Examiner] The Trump administration’s tax break for underprivileged neighborhoods has attracted an estimated $75 billion dollars in private investment, potentially lifting 1 million people out of poverty, according to a White House study.
Opportunity zones were created in the tax overhaul of 2017, offering capital gains advantages to investors as a way to encourage new businesses, housing, and jobs.
President Trump has hailed their success. But critics say the biggest beneficiaries are billionaire financiers and warn that a small number of the most attractive zones are attracting the bulk of the money.
A study by the White House Council of Economic Advisers, obtained by the Washington Examiner and due to be published on Monday, estimates that $75 billion has been raised by funds set up to invest in the zones — money that would likely have been directed elsewhere without the breaks.
"The CEA estimates that opportunity zone designation alone has caused a 1.1 percent increase in housing values," it says. "Greater amenities and economic opportunity behind the housing value increase will be broadly enjoyed, and for the nearly half of OZ residents who own their homes, the increase provides an estimated $11 billion in new wealth."
#6
"President Trump recently ordered a 12,000-troop reduction in American military personnel stationed in Germany. That leaves about 24,000 American soldiers still in the country." 12,000/(12,000 + 24,000) = %30
"Perhaps, but Merkel surely cannot be surprised. Six years ago, all NATO members pledged to spend 2 percent of their GDP on defense. Yet only eight of 29 so far have kept their word.
Germany spends only about 1.4 percent of its GDP on defense. As NATO’s largest, wealthiest and most powerful European member, it sets the example for the rest of alliance."
[ZERO] Actress Rose McGowan has gone on a massive, multi-day Twitter rant against Hillary Clinton, Harvey Weinstein, Bill Clinton, Kamala Harris, the Democratic Party, and former "Charmed" co-star Alyssa Milano.
McGowan - who alleges Harvey Weinstein raped her (he did settle with her for $100,000 in October, 2017 before sending an Israeli intelligence agency, Black Cube, to spy on her) - wrote in a Friday tweet:
"I was raped by a TOP Democratic donor. Hillary Clinton shut down NBC's exposé of HW with one call from her spokesperson," adding "I strongly believe Joe Biden is a rapist. DNC had Bill Clinton, serial abuser of young women (Epstein & others). You want to be pro-Dem? I know more than you will ever know about their evil..."
Days earlier, the disaffected actress then slammed the Democratic party, tweeting: "What have the Democrats done to solve ANYTHING? Help the poor? No. Help black & brown people? No. Stop police brutality? No. Help single mothers? No. Help children? No. You have achieved nothing. NOTHING," adding "Why did people vote Trujmp?
[Townhall] Don't kid yourself. Don't be fooled by the bravado. Democrats behind the scenes are scared and getting more desperate by the day because there are so many signs of a coming Donald Trump victory.
The signs are everywhere.
Polls show an overwhelming majority of Americans don't want to defund police. They want law and order. They support police. Even 80 percent of black voters overwhelmingly disagree with defunding police.
Does anyone with a brain or common sense think this is a good sign for Joe Biden or Democrats? Do you think all these Americans who support the police, want more law and order, and want more police funding are leaning to "law and order Trump" or "defund the police Joe Biden"?
Polls show 83 percent of Americans support President Trump and Housing and Urban Development Secretary Dr. Ben Carson's ending of former President Obama's program designed to fill the suburbs with high-density low-income housing, bringing crime and drugs to the neighborhoods of suburban moms and dads.
Does anyone with a brain or common sense think this is a good sign for Biden or Democrats? Do you think these millions of suburban American homeowners who don't want to see their home value destroyed or their neighborhood turned into war zones like Chicago, Detroit or Baltimore are going to vote enthusiastically for Joe Biden?
Remember, Biden's presidential platform actually puts in writing his goal to supercharge Obama's "destroy the suburbs" program. Biden wants to bring Frankenstein back to life, except twice as big. Goodbye to your safe, peaceful suburban life. Trump wants to protect your neighborhood. I wonder who suburban moms and dads will vote for.
#2
My 93 y/o mother-in-law(MIL) was talking with her younger sister about her assisted-living lockdown/imprisonment. After six months of no personal contact MIL said, "Why am I still here? Why has God kept me alive?" To which her 86 y/o sister replied, "Why? Well to vote for Trump of course."
#5
My 104 MIL has been locked down for 5 months. Her children can not visit and her state of mind is slowly deteriorating. Her intellect is still sharp even though she is a democrat. The family needs to help her vote this year!
A multi-volume chronology and reference guide set detailing three years of the Mexican Drug War between 2010 and 2012.
Rantburg.com and borderlandbeat.com correspondent and author Chris Covert presents his first non-fiction work detailing
the drug and gang related violence in Mexico.
Chris gives us Mexican press dispatches of drug and gang war violence
over three years, presented in a multi volume set intended to chronicle the death, violence and mayhem which has
dominated Mexico for six years.
Rantburg was assembled from recycled algorithms in the United States of America. No
trees were destroyed in the production of this weblog. We did hurt some, though. Sorry.
[Babylon Bee] U.S.—With Epstein’s infamous assistant Ghislaine Maxwell awaiting trial and testimony in prison, many celebrities, politicians, and entertainment industry elites are rushing to make pedophilia generally acceptable before they’re outed as patrons of Epstein’s notorious island.
[Townhall] Don't kid yourself. Don't be fooled by the bravado. Democrats behind the scenes are scared and getting more desperate by the day because there are so many signs of a coming Donald Trump victory.
