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| -Short Attention Span Theater- |
| Biden's Granddaughter Relieved To Have Been Disowned After Seeing Biden Eat Baby |
| 2023-07-16 |
| [BEE] LITTLE ROCK, AR — After watching her grandfather gnaw on a baby on live television, four-year-old Navy Roberts was reportedly relieved that President Biden had disowned her. "I didn't know Grandpa ate babies," said Navy. "I thought it would have been cool to meet my Grandpa and visit the White House -- but, um, I think I'll stay here with my mom." According to sources, Navy occasionally likes to watch the news to see the Grandpa she has never met. "I was sad when I saw Grandpa put up a stocking at Christmas for the dog, but not for me," said Navy. "Then, I saw him lick that little girl like she was a strawberry ice-cream cone. She looked so scared! I'm not sad anymore." Reporters say that the little girl who was chewed on by Mr. Biden has received her tetanus booster and is undergoing a series of shots for rabies. "We're taking the usual precautions with any bite victim," said pediatrician Dr. Amy Reynolds. "President Biden will also be quarantined for two weeks while we test for rabies. Interestingly, his staff said that was already on his schedule anyways. We believe the little girl will make a full recovery, though psychologically, she may always have trust issues with men." At publishing time, the White House reported that the person responsible for keeping the President from eating babies had been fired. |
| Posted by:Besoeker |
| #3 ^^ "and which also exhibits a substantially high degree of mendacious and sociopathic behavior...." |
| Posted by: DooDahMan 2023-07-16 11:37 |
| #2 More media hysteria. According to experts, the genus Biden is mainly herbivorous. One subspecies is known to subsist almost entirely on the coca plant. |
| Posted by: SteveS 2023-07-16 11:31 |
| #1 If you combine the B Bee with some of the other satire sites it would make a great 30 minute program on TV - maybe once a week. Fox has a winner in Gutfield and a decent hit with 'the five' but there is definitely room for a satire only show. |
| Posted by: lord garth 2023-07-16 11:24 |