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-Short Attention Span Theater-
Vlogger Jeff Wittek, 32, sues YouTube millionaire David Dobrik, 25, for $10 MILLION after suffering 'broken skull and face' when he was swung on rope attached to an excavator for a stunt
2022-06-24
[Daily Mail, where America gets its news]
  • Wittek said that his skull was left shattered in nine places by the accident, that he almost lost his eye, broke his foot and hip, and tore a ligament in his leg

  • The lawsuit claimed that the stunt was Dobrik's idea, and that his negligent operation of the excavator lead to Wittek's extensive injuries

  • Dobrik has previously insisted that the stunt was Wittek's idea, and that Wittek asked him to promise never to tell anybody that
Posted by:Skidmark

#8  ^ The laws of physics have a disparate impact on Moron-Americans.
Posted by: Matt   2022-06-24 19:44  

#7  Perhaps there was Roundup, Talcum Powder, or Asbestos present?
Posted by: Frank G   2022-06-24 19:37  

#6  In the brass balls department, apparently there's a lawyer who (1) agreed to represent this guy and (2) wrote the number $10 million in the complaint.
Posted by: Matt   2022-06-24 16:44  

#5  Wait. His skull was thick enough to think that stunt was a good idea.

I don't get it...
Posted by: M. Murcek   2022-06-24 16:33  

#4  governed by Federal safety regulations six inches thick

Not nearly thick enough, apparently.
Posted by: Matt   2022-06-24 16:28  

#3  Skull shattered in nine places. Apparently he wasn't using it
Posted by: Frank G   2022-06-24 10:40  

#2  most people with working remaining higher brain stem functions
Posted by: Skidmark   2022-06-24 10:24  

#1  Dear Jeff - May I call you Jeff? Thank you so much.

See, here's the thing: this was, even by 2022 standards, a remarkably stupid thing to do. I, and most people with working higher brain stem functions, would never think about doing anything like this. But you somehow got it into your head that taking a piece of heavy equipment governed by Federal safety regulations six inches thick, tying yourself to it, and then having an equally logic-challenged friend spin you around, was a Good Idea. Spoiler - it wasn't.

I'm going to offer you a bit of advice: Darwin always comes out ahead, Jeff - you cannot beat the house. His rules are as ironclad as those of Newtonian physics. Now, he may or may not swat you down with the ultimate sanction, and I cannot explain why that is, but you will know it when he addresses you...and Brother, you been addressed. In this case, I shall assume that you have been given the Karmic equivalent of a two-minute warning, and you should heed it.

Reflect upon your sins, Jeff. It may well be your only - and last - opportunity to avoid what surely waits for you if you do something this moronic again.

Best Regards,

Mike
Posted by: MikeKozlowski   2022-06-24 07:44  

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