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Science & Technology |
Walmart Self-Checkout Machine Wins Employee Of The Month Award Again |
2019-06-14 |
[Babylon Bee] RANCHO CUCAMONGA, CA‐A self-checkout machine at a local Walmart store was selected to be honored as the employee of the month for the fifty-second month in a row, sources confirmed Thursday. The checkout machine was recognized for its speedy service, inability to make mathematical errors, and lack of making small talk with customers. "Honestly, Checkout Machine #5 is a dream employee," said store manager Glen Anderson. "#5 never complains, never calls in sick, never makes annoying small talk." The machine didn't make a single error the entire month, yet again, worked full shifts all thirty-one days of the month, and never once took a smoke or lunch break. Customers, especially those with just a few items, reported they had delightful interactions with the employee and were able to get in the store and get out with little hassle thanks to Machine #5. "It's the poster boy for how we want our employees to act around here and the kind of attitude everyone should have." |
Posted by:Besoeker |
#5 reported they had delightful interactions with the employee "And they don't snag our stretch pants!" |
Posted by: Mullah Richard 2019-06-14 13:45 |
#4 Dang. The Bee. Strike Three. |
Posted by: swksvolFF 2019-06-14 09:25 |
#3 "Skin. Bad breath. Overacting. Everything." |
Posted by: Dron66046 2019-06-14 06:52 |
#2 ... then the machines got smart! |
Posted by: Raj 2019-06-14 06:45 |
#1 "Afterwards they fly with a perfect operational record.." - (T2,1991) |
Posted by: Dron66046 2019-06-14 03:48 |