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| -Short Attention Span Theater- |
| Alcohol Detox Program leaves Tri-Cities Washington Man Coming Up Short |
| 2018-11-22 |
| [Breitbart] A man from Washington state severed his testicles using a pocket knife while suffering side effects from alcohol withdrawal, according to a report. The Kennewick Police Department said Friday that its officers received a report of a man using a knife to cut up an animal, KEPR reported. When officers arrived at the man’s home, they discovered his hands and pants were "covered in blood" because he allegedly used a pocket knife to slice off his testicles. Police say the man, who had been going through alcohol detoxification, wrapped the severed organ in a newspaper and left it in a yard. Medics rushed the man to a local hospital, and mental health professionals were notified, the Tri-City Herald reported. His testicles had reportedly been retrieved from the yard and "given to medics." "Ummmm...thanks. Ewwww" It is unclear what the man’s condition was after the incident, but authorities say he has been able to speak with police officers. |
| Posted by:Besoeker |
| #4 In Wigan, a sound resounds daily; The neighbors all groan along gaily. A skeleton having a wank On a plank? Just George and his new banjolele! |
| Posted by: Pancho the Rash2215 2018-11-22 18:10 |
| #3 There was an old miner of Wigan Who used an odd tool, and a big 'un. They thought he was daft When he oiled up the shaft, But he's twenty miles in and still friggin'. |
| Posted by: Pancho the Rash2215 2018-11-22 18:06 |
| #2 " There was a young sailor named Bates who liked to fool around on ice skates. He fell on his cutlass , which rendered him nutless , and practically useless on dates . " |
| Posted by: Snavimble Bucket1794 2018-11-22 16:40 |
| #1 To Kennewick Man let us drink! To his powerful fingers, now linked To robust metacarpals And wrist, but no yarbles... Which might explain why he's extinct. |
| Posted by: Dino Slemble6375 2018-11-22 16:30 |