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Olde Tyme Religion
Pat Robertson Casts ‘Shield Of Protection' Ahead Of Hurricane Florence
2018-09-13
Ohfergawdsake.
In a clip posted online by Right Wing Watch, he asked followers to “put a hand out toward the Atlantic” and repeat an incantation.

“In the name of Jesus, you Hurricane Florence, we speak to you in the name of Jesus, and we command the storm to cease its forward motion and go harmlessly into the Atlantic. Go up north away from land and veer off in the name of Jesus. We declare in the name of the lord that you shall go no farther, you shall do no damage in this area.”

He also declared a “shield of protection” over the Virginia area in which he was speaking and around “innocent people” in the storm’s path.
The old charlatan never hesitates to make himself look foolish. The shade of Simon Magus is please. My apologies to anyone who takes him seriously (Pat Robertson, not Simon Magus).
Posted by:Skidmark

#32  I think the moral of the story is Pat Robertson got lucky. (Better lucky than good).
On the other hand, I got 6" from Gordon and now I suppose I will get as much from Florence, thanks to Robertson.
Cheers.
Posted by: jvalentour   2018-09-13 22:26  

#31  as of now storm moving very slowly off the coast

and the vortex has ingested dry air and weakened to a minimal category 2

still lots and lots of precip though
Posted by: lord garth   2018-09-13 21:09  

#30  No surfers!
WHERE ARE THE SURFERS!
Posted by: Skidmark   2018-09-13 18:33  

#29  Dems, BLM, and Progs fapping to the destroyed flag
Posted by: Frank G   2018-09-13 17:44  

#28  Yep, that's what a hurricane looks like.
Posted by: Thing From Snowy Mountain   2018-09-13 17:09  

#27  Looks a tad inclement.
Posted by: Bright Pebbles   2018-09-13 16:16  

#26  Live cam.

Posted by: Jeasing Jeaque5937   2018-09-13 15:49  

#25  Pina Coladas, when you're caught in the rain.
Posted by: swksvolFF   2018-09-13 13:11  

#24  "Robertson's primary responsibility was supplying alcoholic beverages for his officers."

So, he was Juice-ish?
Posted by: Skidmark   2018-09-13 12:33  

#23  I thought it was the Juice that controlled the weather.

Yes, but Jesus was a Jew. Al Gore is extremely disappointed because the storm appears to have weakened.
Posted by: Abu Uluque   2018-09-13 10:52  

#22  I thought it was the Juice that controlled the weather.

Hello, Joshua of Nazareth
Posted by: g(r)omgoru   2018-09-13 06:31  

#21  Ummm... all of yawl non-heathens open your Bibles to verses Mark 4:38-39 (link), stand and read aloud. Amen!
Posted by: Ebbavirt Clunk4147   2018-09-13 04:41  

#20  Why does Pat Robertson hate the Carolinas?
Posted by: BrerRabbit   2018-09-13 04:15  

#19  If the Hurricane dies out, it shows the power of Trump...

/WAPO.
Opinion: Another hurricane is about to batter our coast. Trump is complicit
Posted by: Bright Pebbles   2018-09-13 04:07  

#18  Through tomorrow at least, jvalentour, since you asked so nicely.
Posted by: trailing wife   2018-09-12 23:59  

#17  Mods , please keep,this thread open until Monday.
Posted by: jvalentour   2018-09-12 21:01  

#16  
Posted by: Thing From Snowy Mountain   2018-09-12 19:30  

#15  Regardless, it is prayer.
Posted by: Woodrow   2018-09-12 18:45  

#14  Maybe he could get the USS Enterprise (1701-D) to go into low orbit and extend its' shields? An idea so crazy it just might work!
Posted by: Raj   2018-09-12 17:53  

#13  Yeah, or he just buttered the east coast.
Posted by: Skidmark   2018-09-12 14:52  

#12  As of 2pm 9/12/18 the NHC predicts that the storm will veer south of Virginia. Robertson's Shield Of Protection seems to be working.
Posted by: jvalentour   2018-09-12 14:20  

#11  "Stopped at full speed at 100 miles per hour,
the Colgate Invisible Shield finally got em…"

- Alice Cooper, Billion Dollar Babies
Posted by: M. Murcek   2018-09-12 10:48  

#10  "Robertson's primary responsibility was supplying alcoholic beverages for his officers."

An honorable and much-appreciated service...but not combat
Posted by: Frank G   2018-09-12 08:49  

#9  Missing Virginia is it ?
Posted by: Besoeker   2018-09-12 07:39  

#8  Agreed, the latest prediction from the NHC shows the storm veering westward and sparing Virginia. Hummm.
Never fear, it will turn North towards the Ohio River Valley and wash out my driveway and bridge.
Posted by: jvalentour   2018-09-12 06:56  

#7  latest computer models show the storm slowing down as it nears the coast

http://weather.unisys.com/forecasts?source=6
Posted by: lord garth   2018-09-12 04:41  

#6  His incantation and a timely evacuation ought to do the trick.
Posted by: gorb   2018-09-12 03:58  

#5  "At the start of the primary election season in early 1988, televangelist Pat Robertson's campaign was attacked because of a statement he had made about his military service. In his campaign literature, he stated he was a combat Marine who served in the Korean War. Other Marines in his battalion contradicted Robertson's version, claiming he had never spent a day in a combat environment. They asserted that instead of fighting in the war, Robertson's primary responsibility was supplying alcoholic beverages for his officers."
Posted by: Skidmark   2018-09-12 02:37  

#4  I thought it was the Juice that controlled the weather.

Yes, they have the lead.
Posted by: Besoeker   2018-09-12 02:21  

#3   we speak to you in the name of Jesus

I thought it was the Juice that controlled the weather.
Posted by: SteveS   2018-09-12 02:19  

#2  "We have no atheists in the trenches."

Perhaps it’s the trench thingy. By the next war, Mr. Wife’s Uncle Bill was comfortable being militantly atheist in his very Catholic family. But he fought far from any trenches, so science would say that there’s the correlation.
Posted by: trailing wife   2018-09-12 01:01  

#1  "We have no atheists in the trenches."
~ The Western Times” newspaper of Devon, England in November 1914.
Posted by: Besoeker   2018-09-12 00:45  

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