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| Home Front: Culture Wars |
| Why Men and Women Can No Longer Be Friends |
| 2017-11-08 |
| [IntellectualTakeout] In the wake of the Harvey Weinstein allegations, the quest to stamp out sexual harassment against women has spread like wildfire, not only in the U.S., but also across the pond to our European counterparts. As many women have made clear, unwanted attention from men, particularly when it is the aggressive, Weinstein-esque form of sexual assault, is never fun. But many others are beginning to realize that the fervor to stamp out sexual harassment can go too far, and may in fact further damage the friendly, working and/or courtship relationship between the sexes. This is particularly evidenced through the simple fact that a number of young people now perceive winking to be a form of sexual harassment. The question is, how did we get to such an escalated form of fear and antagonism between the sexes? It used to seem that a mutual respect existed between men and women, a respect which allowed them to enjoy the companionship of the opposite sex. Now that seems to have vanished. What changed? Author and columnist Peter Hitchens recently addressed that issue. Writing in the Daily Mail, Hitchens suggests that the great quest for equality and liberation birthed in the sixties spread farther than we may have desired. To be logically consistent, he implies, we must allow the freedom and liberation which that era advanced to extend to other areas of life, breaking down traditional safeguards and manners in the process: "[M]any of those who claim to seek female equality have another, much fiercer objective. They actually see men as the enemy, the ’patriarchy’, to be overthrown by all means necessary, and replaced by a feminised society. They also see marriage as a machine for oppressing women. Their objectives moved a lot closer last week. This is why many of those who said they wanted equality also sneered at restraint and manners. They claim now that they want the restraint and the manners back...." The trouble is, it’s hard to regain those manners once lost: "But where are such restrained manners to come from in our liberated society? They were part of an elaborate code of courtship and respect which was learned by example in the married family, and has now completely vanished. In our post-marriage free-for-all, why should we expect either sex to be restrained? All that’s left is the police or the public pillory of Twitter." Interestingly, this problem was foreshadowed by Alexis de Tocqueville in his 19th century analysis of American culture. When it came to the sexes, Tocqueville observed a very different treatment of women in America from what took place in Europe. In Europe, Tocqueville noted, men and women were not only treated as equals, they were also treated as the same in duties and functions. But while such a state looked good on the surface, underneath it created a culture of contempt for women. In the U.S., however, Tocqueville found that women experienced greater freedom and respect (and by implication, greater happiness) when they embraced the differences between the sexes: "In the United States men seldom compliment women, but they daily show how much they esteem them. They constantly display an entire confidence in the understanding of a wife and a profound respect for her freedom; they have decided that her mind is just as fitted as that of a man to discover the plain truth, and her heart as firm to embrace it; and they have never sought to place her virtue, any more than his, under the shelter of prejudice, ignorance, and fear." In other words, manners influenced by social and cultural boundaries ‐ boundaries which some might consider too prudish today ‐ went further in promoting mutual respect and confidence between the sexes than did the complete absence of them." |
| Posted by:Anomalous Sources |
| #12 liberal men and liberal women maybe. The red states seem to be doing okay. |
| Posted by: rjschwarz 2017-11-08 21:22 |
| #11 But they manage to stick together somehow. |
| Posted by: gorb 2017-11-08 14:38 |
| #10 "When you understand women let me know", is a comment I get now and then. My normal response is "women don't understand women either". |
| Posted by: Dale 2017-11-08 08:33 |
| #9 C.S. Lewis famously noted that the truly progressive individual will admit when he’s taken a wrong turn, will turn around, and then look to the past to see where he has gone wrong. Is this what we need to do in regard to male-female relationships? Today, the left never does this. Instead, their talking points go into the echo chamber of the MSM and rattle around. I don't happen to believe this statement Why Men and Women Can No Longer Be Friends--maybe this is true in the perverted and distorted reality of the left but not in many other places such as flyover land. |
| Posted by: JohnQC 2017-11-08 08:12 |
| #8 Only works man ---> imitation woman, M. Schwarzeneggar4294. |
| Posted by: g(r)omgoru 2017-11-08 07:47 |
| #7 g(r)omgoru, There is always surgery ... |
| Posted by: M. Schwarzeneggar4294 2017-11-08 07:09 |
| #6 One of my distant cousins recently mentioned on her FB page... FB is something akin to a daily and very public PSA screening without the doctor. |
| Posted by: Besoeker 2017-11-08 06:40 |
| #5 One of my distant cousins recently mentioned on her FB page being upset with some aspect of the "male gaze". I guess I won't ever bother to attempt to meet her. |
| Posted by: Anguper Hupomosing9418 2017-11-08 04:16 |
| #4 The most important thing to remember about modern feminism is that it's dominated by a handful of bitches who envy and hate men - because they can never be men. |
| Posted by: g(r)omgoru 2017-11-08 03:00 |
| #3 "In the United States men seldom compliment women." My wife's cooking is well complimented. Beyond that, I generally avoid eye contact. Rag nailed it. |
| Posted by: Besoeker 2017-11-08 02:59 |
| #2 "In the United States men seldom compliment women." Truer today than Alexis would have figured. I can count on one hand the number of compliments I've dished out to women in the past twenty years, none of them in the corporate workplace. It's entirely defensive in nature - I don't need some vindictive psycho broad coming after me and ruining whatever reputation I have. I will not consciously put myself in that fucking prone position. |
| Posted by: Raj 2017-11-08 01:51 |
| #1 In the business world nowadays you're likely to see a fair amount of harassment initiated by women against men, and in certain environments (e.g. insurance companies, banks, etc.), this can be extreme and overwhelming. You'll not be likely to see much argument by men who want to keep their jobs, but if you've got idiots like me who complain, well you're up against city hall. |
| Posted by: Fairbanks 2017-11-08 01:43 |