I'm sorry, sir. Our weapons are useless against them.All right, chief. Manolo, send in...the mimes.
Are you sure you want to do this sir?
Dammit! We have no choice!
CARACAS, Venezuela -- A part of Venezuela's capital is giving dangerous drivers the silent treatment, sending mimes into the streets to do what police alone have not: tame the lawless traffic.
Try this in Boston and it would become the Dead Mime Capital of the world...
One thing to remember when shooting mimes: Always use a silencer.
Or, you could just use your index finger...
About 120 mimes dressed in clown-like outfits and white gloves took to the streets of the Sucre district this past week, wagging their fingers at traffic violators and at pedestrians who streaked across busy avenues rather than waiting at crosswalks.
Okay, mimes! Hit the streets!
.....!
"Eduardo! That mime just waggled his finger at me!"
"Hand me my gun! The one with the silencer, dammit!"
They found plenty to keep them busy in a city where motorcycle riders roar down sidewalks, buses drop passengers in the middle of busy streets and drivers treat red lights and speed limits as suggestions rather than orders.
Seen it...done it.
"Most people are collaborating, but bad habits are usually hard to break and some drivers just don't change their ways," said Neidy Suarez, an 18-year-old mime wearing fluorescent yellow overalls and a bright red ribbon wrapped around her pigtails. Suarez frowned, thrust her hands forward in a "stop" motion and then pointed to a red light as a motorcyclist raced toward a crosswalk filled with pedestrians.
What's mime is mime, what's yours we'll pantomime...
"Some people get angry when we reprimand them," Suarez said. Some drivers have shouted insults after a silent rebuke.
Pretty soon...THUMP...This is car 12! Mime down! Mime down!
Take it easy, mime. Helps on the way.
...!...!...!.......!..........................................
It's too late, sarge. He's gone.
....!
Oh, you bastard! No wonder everybody hates you people!
If a mime falls in the woods does anybody care?
"But most people react agreeably and some have offered compliments," Suarez said, raising her voice from time to time so she would be heard amid the honking horns, ambulance sirens, rumbling bus engines and music throbbing from car stereos.
Raising her voice? Ha!
You're a disgrace to the profession, lady. Turn in your invisible box and striped shirt and get out of my sight! You'll never work in this town again!
Mayor Carlos Ocariz of Sucre, in the eastern part of Caracas, turned to the mimes to encourage civility among reckless drivers and careless pedestrians.
"Si. We're over-populated with mimes. We gotta thin the herd!"
He is following the example of Antanas Mockus, a former mayor of Bogota, Colombia, who combined mimes and stricter police enforcement in a program that was widely seen as a success.
Tonight on "Mimes and Cops"...
"The Silent Landmines of Bogota"...
Caracas' streets, though, may be even more chaotic than those of Colombia's capital. Drivers who miss a highway exit often simply put their cars in reverse and return through oncoming traffic.
Seen it...
Motorbike riders charge the wrong way up one-way streets and honk pedestrians aside as they roar onto sidewalks, sometimes with small children tucked precariously between an adult passenger and driver.
Seen it...
Alex Ojeda, president of the Jose Angel Lamas Foundation, a cultural organization that employed professional actors to train the mimes, said he is confident the mimes will help, although he conceded that changing the behaviour of motorists will be a long-term task. Generations of attempts to enforce traffic laws have largely failed."Many times, the mimes can achieve what traffic police cannot achieve using warning and sanctions in their efforts to maintain control," he said. "Mimes, on the contrary, often achieve the same objective by employing artistic and peaceful actions."
So let's embarrass the cops by showing the citizenry that even mimes are better at law enforcement than they are.
At a ceremony for newly trained mimes, Ocariz vowed to keep up the effort "until the streets of Sucre are full of creativity and education."
...or splattered, dead mimes.