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-Short Attention Span Theater- |
Man who came back to life is dead |
2011-04-27 |
[Straits Times] A 65-YEAR-OLD man, believed to be Malaysia's first person with the rare Lazarus phenomenon, died on Tuesday. "I'll tell you what's wrong with 'im, my lad. 'E's dead, that's what's wrong with 'im!" On April 14, this man had stopped breathing and doctors pronounced him dead. He's dead, Jim! But, miraculously, he began breathing again after two-and-a-half hours. "No no he's not dead, he's, he's restin'!" However, The over-used However... on Tuesday Ng Ba Kia alias Ng Swee Hock breathed his last at his home in Kampung Tok Elong here at about 10.50am. (Takes corpse out of the hospital bed and thumps its head on the counter. Throws it up in the air and watches it plummet to the floor.) A Seberang Jaya Hospital ambulance had earlier taken Ng back home, where his wife and relatives received him. "Now that's what I call a dead guy!" "No, no.....No, 'e's stunned!" "STUNNED?!?" He was rushed to the hospital on April 14 after he stopped breathing at his home. "Well, he's...he's, ah...probably pining for the fjords." Doctors then performed cardio pulmonary resuscitation (CPR) on him for 45 minutes but there was no response and he was pronounced dead. He's dead, Jim! He started breathing again on his own. "'E's not pinin'! 'E's passed on! This man is no more! He has ceased to be! 'E's expired and gone to meet 'is maker! 'E's a stiff! Bereft of life, 'e rests in peace! If you hadn't nailed 'im to the bed 'e'd be pushing up the daisies! 'Is metabolic processes are now 'istory! 'E's off the bench! 'E's kicked the bucket, 'e's shuffled off 'is mortal coil, run down the curtain and joined the bleedin' choir invisibile!! THIS IS AN EX-PERSON!!" "Whut? Whut? Did somebody say somethin'?" "Shuddup, you! An' lay back down! You ain't foolin' us none!" |
Posted by:Fred |
#8 "Have you ever experienced medical care in these countries?" Has anybody, newc? |
Posted by: Barbara Skolaut 2011-04-27 22:45 |
#7 Have you ever experienced medical care in these countries? |
Posted by: newc 2011-04-27 22:13 |
#6 half of a two trick pony. |
Posted by: Skunky Glin**** 2011-04-27 21:54 |
#5 What is a one trick pony? |
Posted by: Besoeker 2011-04-27 21:47 |
#4 If at first you don't succeed...you know the rest. |
Posted by: Secret Asian Man 2011-04-27 19:37 |
#3 "It's a MIRACLE!!" "Ah - not so fast..." |
Posted by: mojo 2011-04-27 15:13 |
#2 the waiting period on the life insurance policy musta ended |
Posted by: Frank G 2011-04-27 12:22 |
#1 A Seberang Jaya Hospital ambulance had earlier taken Ng back home, where his wife and relatives received him. Must've kept the pillow on his face a little bit longer this time... |
Posted by: tu3031 2011-04-27 12:07 |