Reuters.Must've been a slaw news day in Europe.
German police are searching for a motorist who beat a 24-year-old woman selling white asparagus because he was upset about her asking price for the coveted springtime vegetable, police said on Monday.
Lettuce hear some more, please.
The prices for white asparagus, sometimes called "edible ivory" in Germany, fluctuate wildly during the short springtime season, peaking early in the season at 10 euros per kilo.
Any way you slice it, that's a lot of green.
The man screamed at the woman that her asparagus was overpriced. He then punched her in the face and threatened to unleash his attack dog at her.
"He tried to squash me! He didn't carrot all about my feelings!"
She fled and called police.
"This looks like a case for...Inspector Legume!"
"The motorist said her prices were totally over the top," said Dietmar Keck, police spokesman in the Havelland district west of Berlin, without saying how much she was asking.
"It may have been more than he could afford on his celery, but that doesn't give him any right to bean her. When we catch him, he'd better kumquatly peas or he'll be in an even worse pickle. We Germans take our vegetables very seriously."