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| -Short Attention Span Theater- |
| Two police officers given run-around by giant white rabbit |
| 2009-02-25 |
| Since the British Empire disappeared, we have to look to smaller things to keep us amused. Two police officers were given the run-around for 20 minutes in a low-speed pursuit of a giant white rabbit on the loose in a town centre. Pcs Matt Jackson and Yasmin Mossadegh, of Kent Police, came across the two-foot long, 20lbs animal - the size of a small dog - hopping along a road in Canterbury at 2.20am on Sunday. Practicing for Easter, are yeh? Do you have a permit for this activity? They admitted that at first it seemed like "something out of Alice in Wonderland". But detaining the albino rabbit before it caused an accident proved to be more of a handful than they first thought. After spending 10 minutes fruitlessly trying to grab the animal - even resorting to using their jackets as matador capes in a bid to snare the creature - they had to call on eight members of the public to help out. Damned waskelley wabbit, defying the law. You eight people are deputized. Waise yer wight hand and take the oath. OK, on to the wabbit. Pc Jackson said: "After several failed attempts trying to grab the rabbit, we removed our coats to try and cover it with a bullfighting technique. Again this failed. This wabbit is smarter than I thought.....We need more deputies!!!! Put out a call for volunteers!! Bullfighting. A rabbit. Tell me that this is on YouTube ... "Pet-loving members of the public who were passing by saw us struggling and rushed to our assistance. Now, with 10 pairs of hands at the ready, the rabbit's time on the run was coming to an end." The officers and members of the public pursued it for about 200 yards before it was finally caught. That's 183 metres for you Euro chaps. Pc Jackson added with a smile: "Inquiries are ongoing into unconfirmed reports that Bunny had an accomplice called Clyde who assisted in the hare-brained escape idea." No jokes, Jackson. You have wasted the public time enough perusing the White Wabbit. The rabbit has been nicknamed Tiny and is currently being cared for by staff at Barton Veterinary Hospital in New Dover Road. It is still unknown where the animal came from. Veterinary nurse Jenny Gooderham said: "I think it is someone's pet as it is in good condition and is used to being handled. We've certainly never had a stray giant rabbit before - they are not very common." It is rumored that a big stew will be made for the homeless tonight, we are looking for a few volunteer carrots, onions, and potatoes, to go with the Wabbit. |
| Posted by:Alaska Paul |
| #3 Bring the Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch! |
| Posted by: Formerly Dan 2009-02-25 23:13 |
| #2 "Okay, Harvey, yer nicked!" |
| Posted by: Mike 2009-02-25 22:05 |
| #1 One pill makes you larger And one pill makes you small And the ones that mother gives you Don't do anything at all Go ask Alice When she's ten feet tall And if you go chasing rabbits And you know you're going to fall Tell 'em a hookah smoking caterpillar Has given you the call Call Alice When she was just small When men on the chessboard Get up and tell you where to go And you've just had some kind of mushroom And your mind is moving low Go ask Alice I think she'll know When logic and proportion Have fallen sloppy dead And the White Knight is talking backwards And the Red Queen's "off with her head!" Remember what the dormouse said: "Feed your head Feed your head Feed your head" |
| Posted by: Glomotch Thavise2856 2009-02-25 20:35 |