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| -Short Attention Span Theater- |
| Family angry that supermarket won't personalize cake for son |
| 2008-12-17 |
| Who happens to be named after a prominent historical figure. JoyceLynn Aryan Nation Campbell, Honszlynn Hinler Jeannie Campbell and Adolf Hitler Campbell. Good names for a trio of toddlers? Heath and Deborah Campbell think so. The Holland Township couple has picked those names and the oldest child, Adolf Hitler Campbell, turns 3 today. Happy burthday, Adolf Hitler Happy burthday to you This has given rise to a problem, because the ShopRite supermarket in Greenwich Township has refused to make a cake for young Adolf's birthday. The ShopRite in Greenwich Township has also refused to make a cake bearing the name of Campbell's daughter, JoyceLynn Aryan Nation Campbell, who turns 2 in February. JoyceLynn Aryan Nation! Y'all mind yer manners er I'll give yas the whut fer! Honszlynn Hinler Jeannie Campbell, a girl named for Schutzstaffel head Heinrich Himmler, turns 1 in April. Yes, sir, that Heinrich Hinler shure had some snappy lookin uniforms. "We believe the request ... to inscribe a birthday wish to Adolf Hitler is inappropriate," said Karen Meleta, a ShopRite spokeswoman. The Campbells turned down the market's offer to make a cake with enough room for them to write their own inscription and can't understand what all of the fuss is about. Yay-ah, what's all this heah fuss all about. "ShopRite can't even make a cake for a 3-year-old," said Deborah Campbell, 25, who is Heath's wife of three years and the mother of the children. "That's sad." I'll translate...cha-ching! Although they'd probably settle up for a six pack and a carton of Marlboros. Additional background from another story... The Campbells have swastikas in each room of their home, the rented half of a one-story duplex just outside Milford, a borough in Hunterdon County. They say they aren't racists but believe races shouldn't mix. Really. God forbid their contribution to the master race's gene pool gets tainted... The Campbells said they wanted their children to have unique names and didn't expect the names to cause problems. Despite the cake refusal, the Campbells said they don't expect the names to cause problems later, such as when the children start school. ...and if they follow in mama and daddy's footsteps, it's not like they're ever gonna want to get jobs. "I just figured that they're just names," Deborah Campbell said. "They're just kids. They're not going to hurt anybody." Other then the fact that they're probably doomed for life. But that's not your problem, right, mama? Heath Campbell said some people like the names but others are shocked to hear them. "They say, 'He (Hitler) killed all those people.' I say, 'You're living in the wrong decade. That Hitler's gone,'" he said. "They're just names, you know," he said. "Yeah, they (Nazis) were bad people back then. But my kids are little. They're not going to grow up like that. Other kids get their cake. I get a hard time," he said. "It's not fair to my children. How can a name be offensive?" he asked. "Why not call the kid Peace?" Nah. That ain't cool like Adolph Hitler Aryan Nation Hienrich Hinler... The Campbell home is kept neat aside from scattered toys and other evidence three children live there. It's small, but it's what the Campbells can afford. Disabilities, the couple says, have left both out of work: Heath Campbell can't landscape or pump gas because he has emphysema, and Deborah can't waitress because she has a bad back. They live on Social Security payments. Yep, I gots the emferzema and shes got the bad back. If she wasn't on it all the time, pumping out little Aryans, maybe she wouldn't have a bad back. In the foyer, Heath Campbell, who said he has German ancestry and a relative who fought for the SS, took off boots he said were worn by a Nazi solider named Daniel. Wait'll they read that in hell. "Hey, Daniel! Some nutbag American welfare scammer's got your boots!" He laid them next to a skull with a swastika on its forehead, the first of dozens of swastikas seen by the Campbells' rare guests. Rare guests? You're kidding? There are swastikas on walls, on jackets, on the freezer and on a pillow. The family car had swastikas, Heath Campbell said, until New Jersey's Department of Children and Families told him they could endanger the children. The swastikas, Heath Campbell said, are symbols of peace and balance. He considers them art. "It doesn't mean hatred to me," he said. Deborah Campbell said a swastika "doesn't really have a meaning. It's just a symbol." Yep, we just loves them there Heath Campbell said he doesn't want to force his views on his children, in part because he had views forced on him. He said he also teaches them nonviolence. Geez, he's like the Nazi Ghandi... He said Adolf Hitler, Aryan Nation and Hinler would be able to make their own decisions about race. ...as long as they're the raht ones. |
| Posted by:tu3031 |
| #23 Ima in awe - short, sweet, and deep, hitting most the PC internal organs |
| Posted by: Frank G 2008-12-17 23:16 |
| #22 Gorb wins the Snark o' the Day™ award! :-D |
| Posted by: Barbara Skolaut 2008-12-17 23:05 |
| #21 I have the same problem with cakes for my son, Pol Pot Attila Caligula Goldstein Wow. Just because he's Jewish? |
| Posted by: gorb 2008-12-17 22:32 |
| #20 They were just on the news. The wife actually looks like Heinrich Himmler. |
| Posted by: tu3031 2008-12-17 22:18 |
| #19 I wish "white power" genetic lowballs would quit trying to represent my race. If given a vote, they would be off the island |
| Posted by: Frank G 2008-12-17 22:05 |
| #18 D *** NG IT, the OWG-NWO STALINREICH CAKE COMGRUPPEN will hear about this, you betcha COmrade! |
| Posted by: JosephMendiola 2008-12-17 19:22 |
| #17 I have the same problem with cakes for my son, Pol Pot Attila Caligula Goldstein... |
| Posted by: mojo 2008-12-17 14:57 |
| #16 Hinler? Reminds me of the Monty Python sketch with Mr. Hilter and Ron Vibbentrop. |
| Posted by: xbalanke 2008-12-17 14:47 |
| #15 Parents get together for a family reunion. |
| Posted by: GolfBravoUSMC 2008-12-17 13:28 |
#14  |
| Posted by: GolfBravoUSMC 2008-12-17 13:21 |
| #13 Not if the name was Abdul Rahman al Ghafiqi. |
| Posted by: swksvolFF 2008-12-17 12:47 |
| #12 This happened in the Netherlands. Do they have the right to refuse service? |
| Posted by: rjschwarz 2008-12-17 11:29 |
| #11 big jim you beat me too the main point, sounds like they just trying for a lawsuit |
| Posted by: sinse 2008-12-17 11:27 |
| #10 Put whatever name you want on my cake as long as Sara Parin jumps out of it as I blow out the candles. |
| Posted by: Besoeker 2008-12-17 10:47 |
| #9 Butch Phinese5548, I think I'll name my child Maximilian. You wanna make his birthday cake? |
| Posted by: b 2008-12-17 10:40 |
| #8 Well, not exactly, Jim, we have certain laws about that. But I'm comfortably certain I can refuse to serve 'Adolf Hitler Campbell' if I wish. |
| Posted by: Steve White 2008-12-17 10:28 |
| #7 Man, I hate Illinois Nazis... |
| Posted by: mojo 2008-12-17 10:27 |
| #6 A private business has the right to refuse service to anyone. |
| Posted by: bigjim-ky 2008-12-17 10:20 |
| #5 He should sue. We all have certain unalienable rights, of which also include the freedom of speech and to pick your son's name. The supermarket chain's choice to deny him service due to them not "liking" his name is discriminatory. Their denial of this common service on ground of them not liking his name is the same as denying the service to blacks and latinos because they do not like their color or names. I myself am Latino and have felt racism, but have come to the understanding that as long as they do not physically harm me, they have the right to think how ever they want to think. My wish would be for them to change their views and no longer be racist, but they have their right to choose to be or not to be. |
| Posted by: Butch Phinese5548 2008-12-17 09:51 |
| #4 In Germany the state has a veto over childrens names. I never really understood the law before now. |
| Posted by: rjschwarz 2008-12-17 09:15 |
| #3 You need a license to drive a car but anyone can have kids and vote. That problem seems clearer now then ever. |
| Posted by: Hellfish 2008-12-17 08:54 |
| #2 Charming people. |
| Posted by: g(r)omgoru 2008-12-17 04:22 |
#1 Meet the parents: |
| Posted by: gorb 2008-12-17 03:06 |