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-Lurid Crime Tales-
Today's Idiot
2008-03-29
Man Had Sex With Picnic Table
You Just Can't Make This Sh*t Stuff Up
BELLEVUE, Ohio — Police said an Ohio man has been arrested for allegedly having sex with a picnic table.
Eeeewwwwwww. At least he called the table the next morning cleaned the table afterward.
Police arrested Arthur Price Jr. after an anonymous tipster dropped off three DVDs that reportedly showed Price in the act.
Snipped section with description of deed. There is such a thing as too much information....
During questioning, he reportedly admitted to having sex with the table. Police said he also admitted to bringing the table inside his home for sex.
I take it he lives alone? (And likely to stay that way)
Price faces four counts of public stupidity indecency. He was freed after posting $20,000 bond, authorities said.
Wonder how he explained this to Mom when he called her up to come bail him out?
Posted by:Barbara Skolaut

#12  of course that could likely be just be baseless bragging...
Posted by: Frank G   2008-03-29 23:49  

#11  Speaking of too much information, Frank...
Posted by: Barbara Skolaut   2008-03-29 23:22  

#10  I had a cheerleader once on a picnic table... maybe he's just unclear on the concept?
Posted by: Frank G   2008-03-29 17:24  

#9  Serial table abuser picnicker. Suffers from tablophilia. Struggles with mahogany complex.

Posted by: Skunky Glins5285   2008-03-29 16:56  

#8  3 dvds, like a miniseries?
Posted by: ed   2008-03-29 14:22  

#7  The dinnette had it coming
Posted by: Zebulon Angavick7428   2008-03-29 13:31  

#6  ...after an anonymous tipster dropped off three DVDs that reportedly showed Price in the act.

Man, I'll bet he thought he was gonna be a millionaire. Like the "Girls Gone Wild" guy...
Posted by: tu3031   2008-03-29 09:29  

#5  Arthur Price Jr., AKA "Stumpy"?

Luckily they caught him early. Unless nipped in the bud, he would likely branch into kitchen nooks and dining room suites.
Posted by: Skunky Glins5285   2008-03-29 09:18  

#4  Eeeeeew - splinters!

That's gotta hurt!
Posted by: Thaing Johnson1215   2008-03-29 06:18  

#3  Gives a whole new perspective on having a woody!
Posted by: Ulomble Ghibelline8019   2008-03-29 03:54  

#2  He'll get off on a knothole loophole.
Posted by: gorb   2008-03-29 02:58  

#1  He loves Wood???

FARK.com > I got nuthin'.
Posted by: JosephMendiola   2008-03-29 00:17  

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