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| -Short Attention Span Theater- |
| Here's a tip . . . |
| 2008-03-26 |
| Jules Crittenden An English friend was asking me about tipping. He didn’t understand how much, why. I explained they actually are allowed to pay waitstaff less than minimum wage, and the tip is part of how they get paid. It ensures good service. It’s the American way. Service, tip. No service, stiffed. He was amazed by all of this. Couldn’t believe it. So I said, “Well, how’s the service in England?” “Bloody awful.” “How’s the service in America?” “Fantastic. The food’s a lot better, too. It’s really good.” “There you go. Over here, if they want to get paid, they have to hop to.” Either that, or they just doctor your credit card bill. America is a great country. I saw a light go on in his head. Slowly but surely, my English pal is coming to recognize how vastly superior America is in all respects. He told me with horror one day, “I overheard an older man in the mall telling a younger lad, ‘The American military is the greatest force for peace in the world. I couldn’t believe it.” “I know,” I said. “It’s really amazing, isn’t it, once you figure that out.” “Wot?” We’re still working on that one. But I’ve explained to him one of these days, he’s going to be back in his own dismal corner of old Blighty (”How was England?” I asked after his last visit. ”Dreary, just the way we like it.”) and some gaptoothed Pom will be sounding off about America this and Yanks that and Iraq Bush blah blah blah, and he’ll find those words coming out of his mouth: “Yeah, well, I don’t expect you to understand it, but the American military is the greatest force for peace in the world. Not only that, but the restaurant service doesn’t suck.” |
| Posted by:Mike |
| #5 The English friend sounds like bog-standard idiot. |
| Posted by: Bulldog 2008-03-26 14:05 |
| #4 As an explanation, over 1500 years of war in Europe left pretty much everyone with a harshly realistic and pessimistic view of the world. The idealism and optimism were pretty much burned out of them, except in small pockets, here and there. America, by contrast, is positively bulging with realism and optimism. At our founding, we were not burdened with government-institutional state religion, so our national goals are set by "We the People", not heaven. And our extraordinary optimism is tempered only by our small enclaves of idealistic pessimists in New England. But being realistic optimists gives us a big advantage over the Europeans, in that we are more objective about the rest of the world. If we see a problem develop, we act quickly, instead of letting it fester until it spirals out of control. Europeans say that we act like "cowboys", for acting soon and forcefully; but the alternative is to wait until it is too late, then respond with nuclear weapons--which is the corner the Europeans have to live in, having painted themselves into it by their inaction. In Iraq, for example, the English were willing to let the Arabs behave in "the Arab way". But Americans had no preconceptions about Arabs. If they were honest and behaved, they were our friends. If they were dishonest and treacherous, they were our enemies. It didn't matter if they were Sheiks or peasants. Therefore, the parts of Iraq we controlled are now doing nicely, but the parts the English controlled are still restive and unsettled. Which means the Americans have to go there and do the work the English didn't do. But that is true to form for Americans, who are the world's policeman out of default, a job that nobody else wants, but has to be done. |
| Posted by: Anonymoose 2008-03-26 11:53 |
| #3 Americans are citizens. Europeans (whether they realize it or not) are subjects. 'Nuff said. |
| Posted by: Barbara Skolaut 2008-03-26 11:36 |
| #2 The first colonies, the ones whose inhabitants came in the Mayflower proposed something who was completely different to everything else in Europe (and to the Spanish/Portuguse colonies) and very subversive to Europe's social order: free commoners taking charge without need for supervsion by their "betters" ie aristocrats. Since then European rulers (1) have done their utmost to denigrate America out of fear of their "peasants" getting bad ideas. In this they have succeeded far too well aided by the raise of socialist ideas (and the natural hate of socalists for "ultracapitalist" America) but also the good old jealousy of the slave towards the freed or escaped slave. Europeans hate you and this has little or nothing to do with GW Bush. (1) You only have to take a look at European societies or remeber about how teh European Constitution has been adopted in a disguised form called "simplified treaty" despite the crushing defeat in France and Netherlands referendums to understand that european "democracies" are designed for keeping the people as fr away as possible of power and obedioent to their betters |
| Posted by: JFM 2008-03-26 10:35 |
| #1 'The American military is the greatest force for peace in the world. I couldnÂ’t believe it." Western and Central Europe has experienced the longest period of peace since the Roman Empire and they can't connect the dots. The only ground the American military has asked to keep for their work is a place to bury their dead. All others have been on lease and we're already packing to come home. |
| Posted by: Procopius2k 2008-03-26 09:38 |