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| -Short Attention Span Theater- |
| Gore files lawsuits against Time |
| 2007-12-24 |
| No, not Scrappleface but Pat Sajak of Wheel of Fortune! Who knew he had such a good sense of humor? Lawyers for former Vice President Al Gore have filed numerous lawsuits against Time magazine, alleging a series of voting irregularities they maintain deprived Gore of Time’s “Person of the Year” Award. It has been announced that Russian President Vladimir Putin received the 2007 award, with Gore finishing second. Details of the suits are sketchy, but one of them accuses certain unnamed Time employees of denying others the right to vote when it was determined they were leaning toward Gore. Rumors have surfaced that one employee, known only as “Chad”, has confirmed those rumors. Another separate suit claims the voting process to be far too complicated to be understood by, to quote the lawsuit, “a bunch of journalists.” Gore’s lawyers are calling for a recount of the ballots in question. They also demand that independent observers from the United Nations Commission on Climate Change be allowed access to any recount procedures. “Mr. Gore has won an Emmy and an Oscar for his important work, not to mention a Nobel Peace Prize,” said a spokesman for the Vice President. “They don’t even have an Oscar ceremony in Russia. Who ever sees Russian films anyway?” Some Gore supporters have accused Republicans of using dirty tricks to manipulate the results. One close advisor, requesting anonymity, claimed, “Putin is just the kind of civil-rights-trampling dictator the GOP loves to see in power. It would be interesting to sit down with those who voted and find out just how many have been subjected to Guantanamo-like coercion. Republicans knew Bush wouldn’t win, so this was the next best thing.” So far, there have been no official comments from the White House, the Kremlin or Time. |
| Posted by:Deacon Blues |
| #18 Putin is one of the wealthiest autocrats in history, largely through his control of several energy subsidiaries. Even after he leaves the stage he will be behind the curtain pulling the strings in Russia. It could be argued that he belongs on the cover of Time because he has led important changes. Perhaps we should ask Anna Politkavskaya, Victor Yushchenko and Alexander Litvinenko if those changes are positive. |
| Posted by: Grumenk Philalzabod0723 2007-12-24 20:33 |
| #17 What did Putin do? He is progressively putting Russia back as a top tier player on the world stage, using energy and military hardware sales, amoungst other things. He also continues to pull Russia out of its post-communism death spiral. A world in which Russia is led by a Yeltsin or Gorbachov type leader would be a very different place. |
| Posted by: phil_b 2007-12-24 17:18 |
| #16 Jeeez, what a fowl up. I remember when Jimmy Durante played the red orchestra pretty much for all it was worth. |
| Posted by: Miz Kalabash 2007-12-24 16:45 |
| #15 Putin did practically nothing ... at all ... anywhere. Time to expand your reading horizon beyond the MSM. |
| Posted by: Nimble Spemble 2007-12-24 15:37 |
| #14 "Putin was the most influential man" In what way? He played absolutely no role in any major story of any importance with the US. The Iranian President played a bigger role. Putin did practically nothing ... at all ... anywhere. |
| Posted by: crosspatch 2007-12-24 15:27 |
| #13 Rumors have surfaced that one employee, known only as “Chad”, has confirmed those rumors Oh that is RICH! They made of person out of the Hanging Chads from Florida! |
| Posted by: Charles 2007-12-24 14:32 |
| #12 yep |
| Posted by: Frank G 2007-12-24 12:16 |
| #11 Some of the comments here are as funny as the article. The outraged ones, I mean, not the deliberate snarks. You guys do understand this is humor and not news, right? |
| Posted by: SteveS 2007-12-24 12:13 |
| #10 Putins award, I don't think he did anything special this year that he didnt' do last year or is likely to do next year. Patreius on the other hand may have reversed the situation in Iraq which could lead to enormous differences in the entire region and the world. Since the award is specific to 2007 I think the General deserves it, but doing so would mean recognizing that Iraq is not an unwinnable quagmire going into an election, something time is hesitant to do so Putin gets it. |
| Posted by: rjschwarz 2007-12-24 10:39 |
| #9 All your awards are belong to me! |
| Posted by: doc 2007-12-24 09:54 |
| #8 Some guy named Durante was seen voting numerous times. |
| Posted by: ed 2007-12-24 09:27 |
| #7 Always the bridesmaid, never the bride, lol... |
| Posted by: Raj 2007-12-24 08:24 |
| #6 Sajak's pretty funny. A real, better choice would've been Petraeus, but Time doesn't deserve him |
| Posted by: Frank G 2007-12-24 04:35 |
| #5 From the Time article: Stalin's ghost appears to Putin in a dream, and Putin asks for his help running the country. Stalin says, "Round up and shoot all the democrats, and then paint the inside of the Kremlin blue." "Why blue?" Putin asks. "Ha!" says Stalin. "I knew you wouldn't ask me about the first part." There is already a new Putin joke: Putin goes to a restaurant with Medvedev and orders a steak. The waiter asks, "And what about the vegetable?" Putin answers, "The vegetable will have steak too." Putin and Bush are fishing on the Volga River. After half an hour Bush complains, "Vladimir, I'm getting bitten like crazy by mosquitoes, but I haven't seen a single one bothering you." Putin: "They know better than that." |
| Posted by: KBK 2007-12-24 02:47 |
| #4 Lawyers for former Vice President Al Gore have filed numerous lawsuits against Time magazine "Red on Red." A good news story. |
| Posted by: Besoeker 2007-12-24 01:01 |
| #3 One close advisor, requesting anonymity, claimed, "It would be interesting to sit down with those who voted and find out just how many have been subjected to Guantanamo-like coercion." Extreme BDS. |
| Posted by: www 2007-12-24 00:58 |
| #2 Gore has a real problem with elections, doesn't he. Just like a spoiled liberal, don't like the results of an election? Why, just cry and stamp your little feet. Putz! |
| Posted by: Skunky Elmomosh5044 2007-12-24 00:49 |
| #1 I realize Putin wouldn't win any popularity contests around here, but I thought Times choice was a good one and refreshingly non-PC. For my money, Putin was the most influential man (as a generic term for a person) in 2007. |
| Posted by: phil_b 2007-12-24 00:09 |