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India-Pakistan
'34 killed in Tuesday's missile strike in Miranshah'
2007-06-21
The caretaker of a madrassa near a site which was the target of an apparent airstrike on Tuesday has said that a total of 34 people were killed, and all of them were locals.
"A-yup! Thet thar earlobe over thar, that usedta be part o' old Mahmoud. Thet thar elbow, that belonged to li'l Fatimah, bless her no-longer-existant heart!"
Security officials said the airstrike was carried out by a US drone that fired two missiles at a suspected hideout for militants. Maulana Muhammad Amir, caretaker of Ziul Aloom madrassa in the Dattakhel area, said all those killed were local tribesmen, and the target was not a madrassa, as reported in the press, but “a tent on a hilltop”. He said 11 of the 34 bodies recovered were charred beyond recognition.
"Yup. We'uns sometimes sets up a tent for our quaint local tribal activities."
"You mean...?"
"A-yup. It wuz the local titty bar."
However, the political administration of North Waziristan said that 30 “terrorists” were killed and 18 of them were foreigners, including Chechens, Uzbeks and Arabs, APP reported. An army spokesman has also denied that it was an airstrike, saying that the explosions were caused when militants preparing bombs accidentally set off some explosives.
"Hey, there, Maulana Ahmed! Y'got a light fer this here stogey?"
Maulana Muhammad Alam, member of a peace committee monitoring implementation of the September 5 peace deal in North Wazrisitan, said the political administration “knows little about the airstrike and the military says nothing. We don’t know what happened.”
"Yeah. We looked around and suddenly it was 'kaboom' all over the place! It wuz just such a surprise!"
Meanwhile, Taliban militants stopped journalists from visiting the site of the attack, warning that “harm may come to you if you go there”.
"Aaaaar! I can say no more!"
Posted by:Fred

#5  How is the caretaker able to identify the remains of locals that are burned beyond recognition? I am glad he is only the janitor and not teaching logic.
Posted by: Super Hose   2007-06-21 22:17  

#4  Air Power is a bitch, I'll tell ya.
Posted by: Jack is Back!   2007-06-21 09:35  

#3  Meh, it's a start.
Posted by: Zenster   2007-06-21 03:29  

#2  Bwaaahahahahahaha!
Posted by: anymouse   2007-06-21 01:54  

#1  Bah! Live by the bomb...
Posted by: newc   2007-06-21 01:06  

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