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India-Pakistan
Woolmer was poisoned, then strangled. Probably not shot or defenestrated.
2007-04-15
"Legume! My cape! The game's afoot!"
The long-awaited toxicology report in Bob Woolmer's murder case has indicated that the Pakistan cricket coach was poisoned before being strangled in his hotel room.
"Iocaine powder! I'd bet my life on it!"
According to a source close to the Jamaican police, the investigators probing in Woolmer's mysterious death believe the South African was poisoned to incapacitate him before murdering him in his Jamaica Pegasus hotel room around one month ago, London daily The Sunday Times reported.
"Join me in a drink, Mr. Woolmer?"
"Ummm... Mine's green. And it's bubbling over the top of the glass!"
"Hmmmm... Yer right. Mine seems to have gone flat. Well, never mind! Drink up!"
But Mark Shields, the Deputy Police Commissioner leading the inquiry, refused to confirm poison was found
"If it was poison, it was a tasteless, colorless, odorless poison that leaves no trace!"
"You mean like iocaine powder?"
"You could bet your life on it!"
and said the toxicology samples and postmortem report would be sent to Britain for further analysis. "If he was manually strangled and asphyxiated, why didn't he put up a fight?
If he was poisoned, why strangle him?
"I've always said there was a possibility he was incapacitated by something else.
"Ow! Hey! That's... a... dart... A... poison... dart. [thud]"
"If I tell you they (the results) have come back and we are conducting further tests, I suggest you draw your own conclusions," he said at a press conference in Kingston on Saturday.
"Inspector! Inspector!"
"Yes?"
"David Gregory, from NBC here! Were there any fingerprints on the poison?"
Shields described the toxicology results as "encouraging" but said the probe could take a "long haul". "There are three possibilities. One is that someone could give themselves up.
"A Perry Mason moment?"
"Really. It's a possibility. Stop laughing."
"Two, there could be a massive breakthrough or, three, we are here for the long haul.
"Inspector! Inspector!"
"Yes?"
"Nic Robertson, from CNN here! How long a haul?"
"How long y'got, Nic?"
"At the moment we are certainly in category three. We would love to move to one but I think that is unlikely at this stage," Shield said. He quashed the speculation that it was the drug iocaine powder aconite, which causes asphyxia.
aconite is from a plant found in the Indian subcontinent . It has been used in several assassinations in Pakistan
Posted by:John Frum

#8  

Woolmer's demise reminds me very little of the way that Rear Admiral Dudley de Vere Compton Bart died.

"He have heart attack and fell out of window onto exploding bomb, and was run over in shooting accident."
Posted by: Zenster   2007-04-15 21:45  

#7  It's global warming, then Imus, then Rove.
Posted by: Closh Slealing7392   2007-04-15 17:45  

#6  Colonel Mustard in the hotel room with the iocaine/rope!
By Jove Inspector! Brilliant short haul solution!
Posted by: Lionel Fligum2391   2007-04-15 17:38  

#5  "David Gregory, from NBC here! Were there any fingerprints on the poison?"

The sad part is, I can see him saying it.
Posted by: Pappy   2007-04-15 15:20  

#4  Great inlining!
Posted by: anonymous5089   2007-04-15 15:00  

#3  I hate to say I told you so, but

Oh, wait - I love saying I told you so. Partularly in this case. No way in hell were his reported symptoms from a "heart attack."

Poor guy; he should have demanded a personal bodyguard and food taster the minute the Pak team lost.
Posted by: Barbara Skolaut   2007-04-15 14:53  

#2  I blame George Bush.
Posted by: Excalibur   2007-04-15 12:53  

#1  poisoned then strangled? sounds like a clear case of suicide to me
Posted by: Frank G   2007-04-15 10:18  

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