(2006-12-30) — The Pentagon announced this morning that a weapon of mass destruction (WMD) was found today in Baghdad, hanging from a rope on a platform.

“This particular WMD,” a Pentagon spokesman said, “is known to have killed thousands of Iraqis, as well as Iranians, Kuwaitis and some U.S. troops.”

The weapon is described as “a nasty, corrosive agent which kills indiscriminately and without warning.”

“A lot of folks — including Hans Blix, the United Nations and the Democrats — said there were no WMD in Iraq,” the Pentagon source said. “Perhaps they were just looking in all the wrong places.”

According to Iraqi government sources, the WMD has been contained, neutralized and prepared for burial.