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International-UN-NGOs | ||||
New Heaviest Element Discovered | ||||
2006-03-04 | ||||
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Since UNium has no electrons, it is inert. However, it can be detected as it impedes every reaction with which it comes into contact. A tiny amount of UNium causes one reaction to take over four days to complete when it would normally take less than a second.
This characteristic of moron-promotion leads some scientists to speculate that UNium is formed whenever morons reach a certain quantity in concentration. This hypocritical quantity is referred to as "Critical Morass." You will know it when you see it.
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Posted by:Nimble Spemble |
#11 ROFLMAO, Moose! *standing ovation* add "despotos", lol |
Posted by: .com 2006-03-04 22:46 |
#10 They should have mentioned its quarks. All originally supposed to be "diplomos", many of which were also "winos"; in fact several prominant groupings include "nepotos", "nemotos", "bozos", "flunkies", "lickspittles", and matched pairs of subordinate quarks called "pedos" and "childmos", that it emits periodically when agitated, but otherwise seem to do nothing other than degenerate in unstable conditions. UNium is ironically stable inside of a shell created with Americanium, from which it tries to steal electrons that few other elements are willing to provide, while at the same time it is both tremendously repelled by Americanium and tries to make it more like Europium, an element of similar class, but more lightweight, older, less energetic, and tending to decay faster. In turn, for the most part "red" Americanium is far more repelled by UNium than is "blue" Americanium. However, Berkellium, an element often supposed to be Americanium, but isn't, is very strongly attracted to UNium, but it is too unstable to do much of anything, being filled with "radicos", "homos", and "lezbos". |
Posted by: Anonymoose 2006-03-04 22:40 |
#9 No Michaelmoorium? A single particle so heavy that it is capable of absorbing a blackhole by itself. Such a feat that observers can't tell the difference between the two. |
Posted by: Jinegum Flaish2343 2006-03-04 21:09 |
#8 LOL, xb! This bit is something of a puzzle, though: it has zero rest mass but tremendous inertia? Thar be sErIoUs MaGiK here, lol. Thx for the link! |
Posted by: .com 2006-03-04 20:18 |
#7 I've always liked this one, too...![]() |
Posted by: .com 2006-03-04 19:40 |
#6 You wish is our command, Visitor. ;-) |
Posted by: lotp 2006-03-04 19:32 |
#5 Albert Einstein grafic, quickly, quickly! |
Posted by: Visitor 2006-03-04 19:26 |
#4 My wife and I were both ROFL reading this. Reminds me of quantum bogodynamics. |
Posted by: xbalanke 2006-03-04 19:06 |
#3 Lol. Beautiful play on the Administratium gag. |
Posted by: .com 2006-03-04 18:22 |
#2 With any luck, this can be neutralized with a strong dose of Boltonium. |
Posted by: Darrell 2006-03-04 18:12 |
#1 Clever and quite funny. |
Posted by: phil_b 2006-03-04 17:51 |