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-Short Attention Span Theater-
Ancient find evokes the image of a terrifying super-scorpion
2005-12-01
Our wierd animal story of the day

The footprints of one of the most fearsome creatures ever found in the British Isles — a water scorpion the length of a person — have been discovered in Scotland.
Atsa pretty big bug...
Tracks in rock on the east coast of Scotland were created 330 million years ago by the six-legged Hibbertopterus, which was 1.6m (5ft 3in) long and 1m (3ft 3in) wide.
"Honey? Did you remember to feed the six-legged Hibbertopterus?"
The water scorpion, which is distantly related to its small modern cousins, had two claw-like arms, an armoured exoskeleton and a powerful tail tipped with a large, flat spike — although it was not poisonous. “I think it would have been a pretty fearsome sight,” said Martin Whyte, of the University of Sheffield, a geologist who found the tracks.
How can he tell it wasn't poisonous if all he found was the tracks? For that matter, how can he tell it had an armored exoskeleton, rather than a thin, pliable exoskeleton? Would the tracks even tell you it had a tail? Why would it necessarily be a fearsome sight, especially if not poisonous? It could be that the beasts went extinct because they weren't armored or poisonous, but had cute little snub-nosed smiley faces. Because they were so friendly-looking, rather like a large puppy only with 700 big brown eyes, and were easy to take apart, they'd have been much like a very large, ambulatory lobster dinner.
Despite its formidable appearance, the creature would have presented little threat to people.
That's probably because there weren't many people around 330 million years ago.
It fed on smaller prey such as water fleas and as an aquatic animal would have been easy to outrun on land.
uh huh. sure.
Well, I think, having seen similar tracks once in the mud along the Mekong river, that the beast lived on ham sandwiches, sea scallions, and salps, and made noises in a high tenor voice.
The discovery, published today in the journal Nature, is the first of its kind in the world.
Marvelously detailed conclusions, based on a set of tracks...
Posted by:lotp & Anonymoose

#7  Sounds like a story from msn.Heard about the one arm doctor..... he caught one THIS............BIG!!!

Army Guy Lies! You have me confused with someone else. Perhaps Hard Dickie from the Life of Your Run?
Posted by: Richard Tremble   2005-12-01 17:18  

#6  I knew a girl like this once....
Posted by: CrazyFool   2005-12-01 14:35  

#5  Sounds like a story from msn.Heard about the one arm doctor..... he caught one THIS............BIG!!!
Posted by: ARMYGUY   2005-12-01 14:31  

#4  Get some hot butter and lemon juice. If you squirt it at them it repels them.
Posted by: Deacon Blues   2005-12-01 13:13  

#3  "... scorpion the length of a person ..."

I faced one of them in King's Quest VII. All you need to do is use the pole with the piece of cloth to distract it ...
Posted by: Xbalanke   2005-12-01 12:51  

#2  The critter is already well known to science.
Posted by: Grunter   2005-12-01 05:52  

#1  good bait for the giant salmon you can find in Scotland , honest ..
I caught one but alas it escaped on the back of a VW beetle (also giant sized)

It was this ------ ----- big
Posted by: Craigum Gleamp6732   2005-12-01 00:24  

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