WASHINGTON - He is "the architect" who steered George W. Bush to victory four times, twice as Texas governor and twice as president. | Victory? But, I thought Bush stole those elections? |
But can Karl Rove organize his own garage? Can the master of Bush's political planning figure out where to put the ladders, paint cans and cardboard boxes? | I don't know, But I'm sure you'll tell us.. |
Rove's wife, Darby, raised the white garage door one morning last week to show journalists outside the million-dollar brick home that the deputy chief of staff, assistant to the president and senior adviser wasn't home. All the interest came on the eve of his testimony Friday before a grand jury investigating who in the White House might have revealed the identity of a CIA desk jockey operative. There was no car in the garage. And the stuff left behind turned out not to be much different from what gathers dust inside most American garages. The inventory, seen from outside:
*Some cardboard file boxes stacked one on top of the other, labeled "Box 6," "Box 4" and what appears to be "Box 7." | No doubt full of ballots from Florida and Ohio |
No sign of boxes 1, 2, 3 and 5. | Four boxes are missing! Quick, convene a "independent" congressional investigation! |
| Or check Sandy Bergler's socks. |
*What appear to be paint cans stacked alongside a folded, folding chair. | Simple cans of paint or Saddam's WMD? You be the judge. |
*A rather large wood crate marked "FRAGILE" and painted with arrows indicating which way is up. | Ah hah, so that's where he's hiding AlGores brain |
On top of the crate, two coolers. | Two coolers, a sure sign of a alcoholic |
*A tall aluminum ladder. | Used for breaking and entering |
*A snow shovel leaned in front of another cardboard box. | Why does he have a snow shovel ready in October? What does he know about the upcoming winter he's not telling us? And just what is in all those boxes? |
*Wicker baskets inside of wicker baskets on top of a shelf running the length of the rear wall. | Baskets inside of baskets, that's symbolic of, er, something... |
*Transparent plastic storage bins crammed with indiscernible stuff. | Transparent, yet indiscernible. Like the plan to invade Iraq |
*Another cardboard box. | Possibly missing box 1, 2, 3, or 5. Or, maybe, a previously unseen unnumbered box. |
*In one corner, the rear wheel of a bicycle sticks out, along with what appears to be a helmet. | Stolen from some poor drowned child in New Orleans |
*Another ladder, this one green, leaning sideways. | I'll bet it was leaning to the RIGHT! |
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