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-Short Attention Span Theater-
Scientologist Elfman wants to "clear the planet" of evil aliens (Hollyweird alert)
2005-02-19

(Jenna's last picture was Looney-Tunes: Back in Action.)
Some Jenna Elfman fans were startled by what the star had to say in a recent issue of Scientology's magazine Celebrity. The former star of "Dharma and Greg" is a devotee of the controversial religion, whose members also include Tom Cruise and John Travolta. "I intend to make Scientology as accessible to as many people as I can. And that is my goal," Elfman said. To do this, she says, it is my "duty to clear the planet."
Hmmm, well she could always dust off some similar "planet-clearing" plans that were made in Germany 60 years ago. Oddly enough, the originators were a group that, like Scientology, is banned by the present-day German government.
By "clearing" she means to rid the world of "body thetans" — aliens who Scientologists believe inhabit the earth from a nuclear explosion 75 million years ago. She continued that "the more successful I became, the more suppression I bumped into 
 especially in the entertainment industry, which really is home to rabid suppression."

"Her comments seem to reflect an increasingly almost paranoid view of the world around her in which she appears to have cleared house of all the suppressive people," Rick Ross, who runs Cultnews.com, tells The Scoop. "Which to Scientologists would include all the people who are critical of Scientology."
Posted by:Atomic Conspiracy

#24  Thank goodness being hot forgives being crazy or she would be in trouble.

Nobody's hot enough to get past being that crazy.

The Raëlians are anti-Bush, the Scientologists are anti-Bush, the PLO is anti-Bush, Does anyone know the Moonies' stance?

Judging by the Washington Times, pro-Bush.
Posted by: VAMark   2005-02-19 5:54:45 PM  

#23  Laugh now but illegal alliens are already working at McRonalds where there 8 plams give them a competitive edge against the lexans. I say strap your blue mattress of love back on the side of your saucer and GO!
Posted by: Flomoting Slolung7595   2005-02-19 3:09:36 PM  

#22  I hope she would rather deport the illegal aliens backto either Mars, Titan, or Europa (Jupiter Moon, not Continent). Elswise we'd have to send them out of the solar system...

He he he he he - The place to send them can be identified in my post #19... He he he...

Keeping the Faith (2000)
B Stiller, J Elfman, E Norton
Jewish girl in real-life converted to Scientology portrays Catholic girl who converts to Judiasm. She's in love with a Rabbi.

I am confused...

Posted by: BigEd   2005-02-19 2:16:06 PM  

#21  I, for one, welcome our new body thetan overlords....
Posted by: Desert Blondie   2005-02-19 1:43:14 PM  

#20  If you knew how many "body thetans" have to be cleared, you might get a little discouraged. Don't go here unless you are feeling strong: ;)
http://www.skeptictank.org/hs/htruebt.htm
Posted by: Tom   2005-02-19 1:06:43 PM  

#19  

Ms. Elfman: Here are some MUG SHOTS. WHo have you seen and where did you see him?
Posted by: BigEd   2005-02-19 12:57:57 PM  

#18  Look at the expression on W's face. Thank God we have a Prez with a sense of humor!
Posted by: BigEd   2005-02-19 12:54:13 PM  

#17  Say Doom?
Posted by: Ayatollah So   2005-02-19 11:56:22 AM  

#16  Korora:
"The Raëlians are anti-Bush, the Scientologists are anti-Bush, the PLO is anti-Bush, Does anyone know the Moonies' stance?"

Not sure about Moonies, but I know whose side we are on:
Posted by: Atomic Conspiracy   2005-02-19 11:31:36 AM  

#15  first they come for the thetans. then nobody's safe.

save the thetans. before its too late.
Posted by: PlanetDan   2005-02-19 11:11:00 AM  

#14  This cannot stand Phil. Get the acetone.
Posted by: Shipman   2005-02-19 10:37:29 AM  

#13  Combined with this item about a "reimagining" of the Looney Tunes characters, I am doubly perturbed.

Maybe they're planning to fight Xenu too?
Posted by: Phil Fraering   2005-02-19 9:58:45 AM  

#12  Your hot bitches are useless against us.
Posted by: Thetan I: Supreme Ruler   2005-02-19 9:41:54 AM  

#11  The Raëlians are anti-Bush, the Scientologists are anti-Bush, the PLO is anti-Bush, Does anyone know the Moonies' stance?
Posted by: Korora   2005-02-19 9:35:18 AM  

#10  Where's the KABOOM? the earth shattering KABOOM?
Posted by: Elmeager Glimp3393   2005-02-19 9:17:16 AM  

#9  Jenna’s last picture was Looney-Tunes: Back in Action. So she had the title role?

Posted by: GK   2005-02-19 9:17:08 AM  

#8  42
Posted by: Deacon Blues   2005-02-19 9:07:16 AM  

#7  Thank goodness being hot forgives being crazy or she would be in trouble.
Posted by: JerseyMike   2005-02-19 7:58:58 AM  

#6  â€œ...the more successful I became, the more suppression I bumped into … especially in the entertainment industry, which really is home to rabid suppression.”

Well, she's right about one thing.
Posted by: Bulldog   2005-02-19 7:06:28 AM  

#5  AzCat - ROFL!!! Thx! Ah, something insanely substantive, rather than insanely pointless such as "clearing the planet" (fung shue for off-center alien vibes?), to look forward to! W00t!!!
Posted by: .com   2005-02-19 2:58:58 AM  

#4  Someday soon, hideous but benign aliens will land on the Washington Mall and demand to see, not President Bush, but a really good tort lawyer.

Within days they will file thousands of defamation suits seeking compensation for anguish and suffering caused by false allegations of kidnapping, torture, cattle-rustling and air-traffic control violations.

Posted by: Atomic Conspiracy   2005-02-19 2:21:37 AM  

#3  "I say we take off and nuke the entire site from orbit. It's the only way to be sure..."
Posted by: Sock Puppet of Doom   2005-02-19 2:18:39 AM  

#2  Clear the planet? No need, it's already scheduled to be demolished to make way for a hyperspace bypass.
Posted by: AzCat   2005-02-19 2:03:02 AM  

#1  Hollyweirdists aren't the only ones advocating a final solution to the Thetan problem (anyone surprised at this alliance?):



Posted by: Atomic Conspiracy   2005-02-19 2:00:50 AM  

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