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Israel-Palestine
Yasser Arafat is mostly dead
2004-11-04
No link yet....

From World Net Daily...
A French-language Israeli newssite is reporting Yasser Arafat, leader of the Palestinian Authority, may have died of a heart attack. The report is based on the Guysen Israel News' sources and is ''unconfirmed.'' ''We do not have any more information on the state of Arafat,'' the latest report said. ''The news of his death is still not confirmed.'' A report earlier in the day from Palestinian Prime Minister Ahmed Qureia said Arafat's condition was improving. Conflicting reports in recent days had him sick with everything from the flu to heart failure. The 74-year-old leader looked pale and tired during the ceremony to swear in an emergency cabinet Tuesday, and some reports say he needed prompting from his aides.
Waiting for confirmation. Fat Lady warming up, ululator being oiled...

From Rooters...
I've pulled the Fat Lady until the inevitable official announcement comes or they bury him without saying anything. Until then, for entertainment...
Palestinian President Yasser Arafat was declared clinically dead on Thursday in a French hospital, Israeli television said citing French sources. But Palestinian Prime Minister Ahmed Qurie denied the report, saying: "I have just spoken to the officials in Paris and they say the situation is still as it was. He is still in the intensive care unit." Israel's Channel Two television cited unnamed sources in Paris saying that Arafat underwent a brain scan and was found to be "no longer alive." Palestinian sources earlier told Reuters that the Palestinian president, who was admitted to hospital last week with a mysterious stomach illness, had slipped into a coma.
Say hello to Himmler for us, Yasser!

AP Update...
French Doctors Say Arafat's Alive
Actually, they said he's not dead. There's a difference...
French doctors announced Thursday that Palestinian leader Yasser Arafat, who is in intensive care at a French military hospital, is still alive.
That's what the AP guy thinks he heard. But actually...
"The clinical situation of the first fews days following admission has become more complex," Christian Estripeau, head of communications for French military health services.
"Our tentative diagnosis at this point is rigor mortis, complicated by the onset of decomposition..."
"The state of health of the patient requires appropriate treatment that required his transfer on Wednesday afternoon of Nov. 3 to a unit adapted to his pathology," Estripeau said.
That'd be the morgue...
"Mr. Arafat is not dead," he said, concluding the brief statement.
"The carcass still breathes, with the aid of the appropriate machinery. The blood still moves in the major blood vessels. Nutrition is being pumped in one end, and waste is being removed from the other. But whether there's anybody home anymore — no matter how loud you knock, nobody answers."
"This statement has been drafted out of respect for the discretion demanded by his wife," he said.
"She really needs those secret account numbers..."
On her way to the bank to make a withdrawl
The statement put to rest for now reports that Arafat has died. Israeli TV's Channel Two cited Israeli security officials as saying they had been told by a reliable French source that Arafat had died. However, Palestinian Prime Minister Ahmed Qureia said there has been no change in Arafat's condition. Palestinian officials said Arafat was in a coma in the intensive care unit of a French military hospital.
Posted by:Lux

#64  Was that a rhetorical question, smn? Was it asked in a frivolous mood?
Posted by: Asedwich   2004-11-05 12:06:18 AM  

#63  No point in mourning Yassir, smn. He's in Paradise with his 72 virgins.

Unfortunately, they're all extremely amorous. And they're all dead ringers for Michael Moore.
Posted by: Darth VAda   2004-11-04 11:07:41 PM  

#62  Not even an ounce of sympathy on this thread! Is there any one out there who will mourn the soul of Arafat? Is there no pity in the world?
Posted by: smn   2004-11-04 10:47:08 PM  

#61  If they try and fly Arafat's rotting corpse back home, I can only hope that Israel has enough sense to blow the plane out of the sky over deep water. No shrine, no martyrdom, no coffin-swarm.

Rot in flaming hell, Arafat. The death and destruction you brought into this world could never be assuaged by your puny death. A thousand slow deaths could not even begin to atone for your evil. Rot in hell, you bastard.
Posted by: Zenster   2004-11-04 10:24:27 PM  

#60  "He was dead before he wasn't dead."
Posted by: dushan   2004-11-04 9:45:10 PM  

#59  Just got in from the villages. I am at the Nome Joint Utilities project office and got on RB, pronto. I am hoping conformation of the Arafish going belly up will be until after 1030PM (0730Z). My ululator is at work. Man, what a week! Now the networks are still talking about the dems. I think that I will go down to the historic Board of Trade Saloon and have some brewskis. Life is good.

As for the Arafish, follow the money. Say hi to Quantrill for us, 'Fish. HA!
Posted by: Alaska Paul at Nome, AK   2004-11-04 9:31:03 PM  

#58  Hey, why am I anonymous? (6414).

Definitely a great week, Beau. Could get better. Streisand could choke on a hair ball, M. Moore could get terminal gout, and moveon.org could find that the "hold harmless and indemnify" clauses in their contracts could bankrupt them without Soros' backing. But still a great week!
Posted by: Asedwich   2004-11-04 9:18:38 PM  

#57  So whaddya figure Mike, will the lieutenants stop fighting, or fight on principles anyway? I figure they'll just fight because they're muslims.
Posted by: Anonymous6414   2004-11-04 9:14:31 PM  

#56  Is it just me, or has this been a pretty good week so far?
Posted by: Beau   2004-11-04 9:13:23 PM  

#55  ..It gets better - according to the World Tribune, Yasser was the only guy who knew where the money was at and how to get at it:

http://www.worldtribune.com/worldtribune/breaking_10.html

Mike
Posted by: Mike Kozlowski   2004-11-04 9:12:00 PM  

#54  I'm sure it was the shock of the election that did it. I submitted a story that didn't make it last night, where the gist of the article was that Arafat gained consiousness long enough to ask about the election results---and then his staff sent Bush a note of congratulations "on his behalf."

I can't ululate worth a darn, but I will go blast a couple of paintballs at the local Muslim Student Union billboards!
Posted by: Anonymous6414   2004-11-04 9:01:09 PM  

#53  Death Rays are at maximum power! Cap'n, she can't take much more of this!
Posted by: Rafael   2004-11-04 7:05:09 PM  

#52  Yasser: May you burn in hell.
Posted by: badanov   2004-11-04 6:47:12 PM  

#51  Oooooohh Yeah!
Posted by: Heysenbergwashere   2004-11-04 5:21:36 PM  

#50  Thanks muck, Prosit!
Posted by: Heysenbergwashere   2004-11-04 5:19:48 PM  

#49  A bit like Breshnev... keep the body warm until the KGB decides on the successor.
Posted by: True German Ally   2004-11-04 5:03:39 PM  

#48  I just saw Steve in the O Club. Maybe he'll buy you a beer...
Posted by: Seafarious   2004-11-04 5:00:35 PM  

#47  itn thursday. that shuld be reeson nuff for a drink. :)
Posted by: muck4doo   2004-11-04 4:59:34 PM  

#46  http://www.haaretzdaily.com/hasen/spages/497284.html

updated 22:03 GMT+2
Posted by: TomAnon   2004-11-04 4:37:00 PM  

#45  Any news Yet?? (just looking for a reason to have a nice drink)

Best analysis so-far: The rat is brain-dead but the body is being kept (technically) alive, so something can be worked out among his "heirs".
Posted by: Heysenbergwashere   2004-11-04 3:45:50 PM  

#44  Death Ray passes first field test.
Posted by: Mike   2004-11-04 3:34:30 PM  

#43  Now you know why The Mossad order the Louisville Sluggers. They're on the lathe now. Five healthy zionist lads are standing by with sledgehammers.
Posted by: Shipman   2004-11-04 3:27:48 PM  

#42  Wasn't that nice of him to wait until after the election?

Fred...you amazing man you, where did you find that picture of Suha singing?
Posted by: 2b   2004-11-04 3:23:48 PM  

#41  What are they going to do Churt? As far as I'm aware the Israelis have locked down the 'territories' and they certainly have contingency plans for when Arafat dies.
Posted by: Tony (UK)   2004-11-04 3:18:05 PM  

#40  Don't Forget poor ol Israel - If that dirty filthy palestinian maggot is dead - Then Israel has a hell of a road ahead of it when the palestinian monkeys are told the news of Yassars death.

Israel should lock n load - Let The Riots Begin.......
Posted by: Churt Snoluque1836   2004-11-04 3:09:19 PM  

#39  
Posted by: Mark Espinola   2004-11-04 2:55:12 PM  

#38  What's next? Eternal flame.
Posted by: Poison Reverse   2004-11-04 2:51:34 PM  

#37  This is like Stalin's death. They have to wait at least three days to make sure he's dead.
Posted by: Rafael   2004-11-04 2:43:44 PM  

#36  Bomb-a-rama,

Why wait? There are pictures of dead pigs all over the internet.
Posted by: Poison Reverse   2004-11-04 2:36:31 PM  

#35  http://www.nationmaster.com/encyclopedia/Generalissimo-Francisco-Franco-is-still-dead
Posted by: Prakk   2004-11-04 2:02:57 PM  

#34  Arafart's corpse on rotten.com anyone??? I look forward to it.
Posted by: Bomb-a-rama   2004-11-04 1:53:54 PM  

#33  I'd be shocked if they buried him anywhere in the Middle East -- the Wahhabists would insist on an unmarked grave and the rest would insist on a shrine. Better just to shove him in the dirt somewhere in his spiritual home land, France.

Ya know, the opportunity to piss on his grave would be enough to get me to travel to Paris.
Posted by: Robert Crawford   2004-11-04 1:29:53 PM  

#32  is it too much to hope for a mass uprising in iran now? just thinking that when it rains, it pours
Posted by: lex   2004-11-04 1:08:37 PM  

#31  E-e-e-e-excellent, Smithers! Give the Chirac impersonator a cookie - then see that he's liquidated, and destroy the rest of the neurotoxin...
Posted by: mojo   2004-11-04 1:02:44 PM  

#30  they are just think ima nice guy. :)


and they're right about that, Muck
Posted by: Frank G   2004-11-04 12:54:21 PM  

#29  ima passin out candys here at work. no one is know why tho. they are just think ima nice guy. :)
Posted by: muck4doo   2004-11-04 12:52:39 PM  

#28  "He is still in the intensive care unit..." ...though dead as a doornail.
I'm convinced that we Bush voters can take credit for this. Glad to do my part.
Posted by: Tom   2004-11-04 12:51:52 PM  

#27  So, with Moslem logic, the FRENCH murdered him! All Palestinians must now ATTACK FRANCE! (Well, it would be funny.)
Posted by: Anonymoose   2004-11-04 12:40:54 PM  

#26  FoRGeT THe ZIoNiST DeATHRaY! Can't you folks see it? This is the shock of the landslide second term for GWB that finally put the last nail in Arafish's coffin! Upon hearing the news, Yasser just couldn't stand it anymore, and passed away, painfully, one can hope.
See, how easy it was, getting rid of him? All you had to do was put your ballot in the box :).
Posted by: Anonymous5089   2004-11-04 12:37:37 PM  

#25  #14

Never forget, never forgive.
Posted by: Atomic Conspiracy


aaahh so there is a reason for bhurkas after all ..
Posted by: MacNails   2004-11-04 12:36:52 PM  

#24  Best. Week. Ever.
Posted by: someone   2004-11-04 12:33:04 PM  

#23  with apologies to Monty Python

Praline: Never mind that my lad, I wish to complain about this terrorist that I purchased not half an hour ago from this very boutique.

Shopkeeper: Oh yes, the Palestinian. What's wrong with it?

Praline: I'll tell you what's wrong with it. It's dead, that's what's wrong with it.

Shopkeeper: No, no it's resting, look!

Praline: Look my lad, I know a dead terrorist when I see one and I'm looking at one right now.

Shopkeeper: No, no sir, it's not dead. It's resting.

Praline: Resting?

Shopkeeper: Yeah, remarkable terrorist the Palestinian, beautiful towel on its head too.

Praline: The towel don't enter into it -- it's stone dead.

Shopkeeper: No, no -- it's just resting.

Praline: All right then, if it's resting I'll wake it up. (shouts into cage) Hello Yassir! I've got a nice billion for you when you wake up, Yassir, Yassir!

Shopkeeper: (jogging cage) There it moved.

Praline: No he didn't. That was you pushing the cage.

Shopkeeper: I did not.

Praline: Yes, you did. (takes terrorist out of cage, shouts) Hello Yassir, Yassir (bangs it against counter) wake up. (throws it in the air and lets it fall to the floor) Now that's what I call a dead terrorist.

Shopkeeper: No, no it's stunned.

Praline: Look my lad, I've had just about enough of this. That terrorist is definitely deceased. And when I bought it not half an hour ago, you assured me that its lack of movement was due to it being tired and shagged out after a long squawk.

Shopkeeper: It's probably pining for the fjords.

Praline: Pining for the fjords, what kind of talk is that? Look, why did it fall flat on its back the moment I got it home?

Shopkeeper: The Palestinian prefers kipping on its back. Beautiful bird, lovely towel.

Praline: Look, I took the liberty of examining that terrorist, and I discovered that the only reason that it had been sitting on its perch in the first place was that it had been nailed there.

Shopkeeper: Well of course it was nailed there. Otherwise it would muscle up to those bars and voom.

Posted by: mhw   2004-11-04 12:23:53 PM  

#22  ... Yasser Arafat, leader of the Palestinian Authority, may have died of a heart attack.

Generally speaking, and I'm no doctor, but I think one is required to actually have a heart to suffer a heart attack.
Posted by: Dripping Sarcasm   2004-11-04 12:17:27 PM  

#21  May flocks of demons accompany you to your rest.

May bees pee upon him.

He will not be missed (by the civilized world, that is....)
Posted by: Desert Blondie   2004-11-04 12:07:30 PM  

#20  Increase power to the Zionist Death Rays! Or are we out of range??
Posted by: Rafael   2004-11-04 12:05:22 PM  

#19  See Ya' Yasser !!

Hope you get a misserable spot on the barbeque spit of eternity!!
Posted by: TomAnon   2004-11-04 11:59:30 AM  

#18  ... they didn't say he wasn't brain dead.

Remember: you're not really dead till the soul slips its mortal coil. I think in Arafat's case that was some time in the late '50s.
Posted by: Bulldog   2004-11-04 11:59:04 AM  

#17  Never again, never again!
Posted by: Mark Espinola   2004-11-04 11:57:21 AM  

#16  I hope that lady in particular is collateral damage as well as all the others celebrating on 9/11. Never Forgive. Never Forget
Posted by: Frank G   2004-11-04 11:57:12 AM  

#15  ulululu?
Posted by: Seafarious   2004-11-04 11:56:06 AM  

#14  

Never forget, never forgive.
Posted by: Atomic Conspiracy   2004-11-04 11:53:25 AM  

#13  I think the French hospital is practicing sophistry, they said he was not dead, but they didn't say he wasn't brain dead.
Posted by: Lux   2004-11-04 11:52:50 AM  

#12  more
Posted by: muck4doo   2004-11-04 11:51:48 AM  

#11  Bush wins and Arafish croaks.
The LLLs are going to think they've died and gone to hell.

Now, if only Mike Al-Moor would have a heart attack and squash Robert Fisk when he falls over.
Posted by: Atomic Conspiracy   2004-11-04 11:50:24 AM  

#10  Hospital denies the claim... yet
Posted by: True German Ally   2004-11-04 11:49:56 AM  

#9  It's on Drudge now as well.
Posted by: AzCat   2004-11-04 11:47:54 AM  

#8  KFI radio (Los Angeles) has the same - sez the confirmation came from the PM of Luxembourg
Posted by: Frank G   2004-11-04 11:46:58 AM  

#7  thisn beter not be nother false alert. that kinda stuff is give blue balls to my emotions.
Posted by: muck4doo   2004-11-04 11:46:35 AM  

#6  Jerusalem Post has the same info - says the Israelis are prepared. Lockdown time in the territories. Civil War in 5....4...3....
Posted by: Frank G   2004-11-04 11:44:23 AM  

#5  Chirac had just visited him in hospital. Who's scripting events at the moment? Shakespeare would be proud of this stuff.
Posted by: Bulldog   2004-11-04 11:43:17 AM  

#4  here is em link.
Posted by: muck4doo   2004-11-04 11:41:42 AM  

#3  Not from the smell...
Posted by: tu3031   2004-11-04 11:33:59 AM  

#2  I'll be the first, how can they tell the difference?
Posted by: Steve   2004-11-04 11:31:18 AM  

#1  Additional info : he's brain dead (no snickering...)
Posted by: Lux   2004-11-04 11:25:16 AM  

00:00