| Submit your comments on this article |
| Home Front: WoT |
| Beer Coolers: New Terror Threat |
| 2004-06-27 |
| EFL As the July 4 holiday approaches, Bush Administration officials are bombarding the nation’s police, fire, emergency and corporate-security offices with another round of terrorism warnings. Although there are no plans to raise the threat level from yellow to orange, a senior Justice Department official says, "there’s very serious intelligence that’s corroborated, that’s multiple sourced, that indicates that al-Qaeda is intent on hitting us and hitting us hard this year." The official concedes, however, that "we don’t have specific information." The 4th is always a good time for a beer and BBQ! Along with this now familiar general warning, the FBI has introduced the specter of a new terrorism threat: booby-trapped beer coolers. Okay. Now they are messing with the wrong guys. Don’t mess the RBer’s beer. Next they will be messing with our popcorn and coffee! A lightly classified bulletin sent to 18,000 state and local agencies last week advised local authorities to look out for plastic-foam containers, inner tubes and other waterborne flotsam commonly seen around marinas that could be rigged to blow up on contact. If the inner tubes don’t have women with bathing suits on, sink them. Also, the bulletin warned, terrorists might attach bombs to buoys. Hey the Paleos attach bombs to boys all the...time, er, ah...ooh he said bouys. FBI and Department of Homeland Security officials say no such devices have actually been discovered, nor is there any current intelligence that terrorists are hatching plots involving floating bombs. But just in case: secure your beer coolers. In fact, just tap a keg and you will have done your part for national security. Cheers! |
| Posted by:Dragon Fly |
| #1 Does this apply to Root Beer as well? :) |
| Posted by: Mark Espinola 2004-06-27 10:15:54 PM |