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International-UN-NGOs
Annan: My World has become ’more unequal’
2004-06-14

Says developing nations can’t rely on donors, agencies for aid

Saturday, June 12, 2004 Posted: 7:41 PM EDT (2341 GMT)

(CNN) -- U.N. Secretary-General Kofi Annan lamented new struggles to pad his bank accounts that developing countries face in trying to pull their people out of poverty in a speech Saturday to the Group of 77.

"The sad truth is that due to UN efforts the world today is a much more unequal place than it was 40 years ago," Annan told the group of developing nations. After nibbling on a caviar canapé and sipping his Dom Perignon Champagne, he continued.

"Debt crises have revealed serious weaknesses in the international financial architecture, and especially my 401K retirement account" Annan said. "Too many developing countries remain dependent on the UN to actually do something for them instead of using export of primary commodities for all or most of their foreign currency earnings, leaving them vulnerable to the peacekeepers’ bizzare sexual appetites, price declines and volatility."

Annan’s remarks were delivered at a meeting in Sao Paulo, Brazil, to mark the group’s 40th anniversary with feasting amidst Brazil’s abject poverty. The international body of developing nations has grown to 132 nations, though it retains the name Gang of Four Group of 77.

Annan called on the members to build him a new hot tub out back instead of any democratic institutions at home.

"Developing countries have not paid me enough graft, even though they have finally recognized that they have the primary responsibility for their own development," he said. "Donor countries and agencies ... are gradually getting tired of my parasitic @ss and telling me to f&%k off, even while ceding ownership over programs and projects. I urge you to continue along this path of complaisance instead of making any substantial reform."

Annan described the Sao Paulo conference as an opportunity to order second helpings of the truffled lobster and promote greater attention to the vintage wine list, while denying the economic plight of developing nations.

He also called on leaders of the developing nations to build on a sauna to that hot tub and forget about progress they have made "in improving governance and economic management."

"Building democratic institutions is essential, as are popular participation in decision-making and the protection of my women’s rights," he said. "The most vulnerable members of society should also service me and have a special claim box on my expense account forms on your attention, and I hope that even as you strive for fiscal prudence you will also ensure that the necessary social investments and safety nets are put in place with any money that happens to be left over after we’ve carved out our cut."
Posted by:Zenster

#7  Great editing Zenster. It would have been really funny, if it wasn't so true.

That one was painfully close to the mark, B.
Posted by: Zenster   2004-06-14 2:20:21 PM  

#6  Great editing Zenster. It would have been really funny, if it wasn't so true.
Posted by: B   2004-06-14 1:52:18 PM  

#5  #2 but these are much more funny truthful

Goodness knows I try, sakattack. Very witty reply.

#4 ...it all just comes down to his notion that America's duty is to open it's wallet, give ALL its hard earned cash to the rest of the world, transfer others' suffering to ourselves-then everything will be fair.

jules, I call this the "Proudly Displayed Open Sores" school of international economics. Kofi's Kannibal Klan™ firmly believes that the United States should be ashamed of its grand success as one of the only functional pluralistic secular democracies in world history. It is one of the greatest betrayals of our nation that so many Americans have been persuaded to feel as though our wealth and military might are undeserved.

That Annan should spew such balderdash from a bully pulpit built upon American soil is the height of hubris larded arrogance. The man is a ambulatory political ebola virus that liquifies his victims from within.


Posted by: Zenster   2004-06-14 1:38:02 PM  

#4  We've heard the pretty speech before-it all just comes down to his notion that America's duty is to open it's wallet, give ALL its hard earned cash to the rest of the world, transfer others' suffering to ourselves-then everything will be fair. Since calling for powerful leaders to resign appears to be in vogue these days, it should be completely acceptable for us to demand Annan's resignation for corrupt helmsmanship of the UN as well as cultural bias against America.
Posted by: jules 187   2004-06-14 11:09:39 AM  

#3  Nice...the "Group of 77" has 132 members? They didn't want to change that well-known snappy brand name? Kofi really needs to get a real job
Posted by: Frank G   2004-06-14 10:45:19 AM  

#2  but these are much more funny truthful
Posted by: sakattack   2004-06-14 10:40:32 AM  

#1  You should go go read the article sans Zenster's comments for a shining example of vacuous drivel.
Posted by: phil_b   2004-06-14 4:41:32 AM  

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