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-Short Attention Span Theater-
Today's Darwin Award Honorable Mentions
2004-05-03
A man trying to rob a St. Croix restaurant was hospitalized after he hid in a heat extraction unit when employees showed up early for work Sunday, authorities said. Workers turned on the cooling system's hood and its fan blades began to strike the man repeatedly, police said. He was in stable condition at a hospital where he was being treated for numerous cuts and abrasions. The man broke into the Tutto Bene Cafe in Christiansted and attempted to open the restaurant's safe, said Scott Hill, the restaurant's executive chef. He became trapped when the first shift reported for work earlier than usual, Hill said. "After employees turned on the unit, they observed an unusual sound coming from inside the roof, where the hood is located," Hill said.
"What kind of sound?'
"Screams, mostly."
The employees searched the unit and discovered the intruder coiled up inside the hood with the blades cutting him. "He was basically stuck inside of it and had nowhere to go once the unit was turned on," he said. No cash was missing. Police said they expected to charge the man with burglary once he is released from the hospital.

Not bad, but doesn't come close to this story from the BBC.
Homes across Middlesbrough were hit by a power cut after a thief tried to steal copper cable from a disused dairy. The 39-year-old man is now critically ill in Newcastle's Royal Victoria Infirmary after suffering a massive shock in the incident. It also left a substantial area of Middlesbrough without electricity on Sunday between 2121 and 2246 BST. Police said the thief had tried to take cable from a site in Roman Road. Cleveland Police said it appeared intruders had entered the premises with the intention of stealing copper cable.
Note to crooks, just because the building is "disused", doesn't mean the power was turned off. Check that next time before you try cutting a cable.
Posted by:Steve

#4  We had a copper cable thief here in little Clinton Iowa a few years ago. He cut into an 8,000 volt line at a closed rail car repair shop. God must love the stupid as all he got was a burned leg! He was saved because the cable was so thick he had to brace the cutter against a heavy conduit, which took the main flow of current to ground.
Posted by: Craig   2004-05-03 1:33:47 PM  

#3  Newcastle's Royal Victoria Infirmary after suffering a massive shock in the incident

The fellow needs time to dicharge.

{pop}
Posted by: BigEd   2004-05-03 12:06:35 PM  

#2  "Screams, mostly."

LOL! That's evil, Steve. Glad I wasn't drinking coffee.
Posted by: PBMcL   2004-05-03 11:51:08 AM  

#1  The 39-year-old man is now critically ill

I like damaged better.
Posted by: Shipman   2004-05-03 10:40:48 AM  

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