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Southeast Asia
Abu Sayyaf leader Mohammed Said bagged
2003-12-29
A top Abu Sayyaf commander carrying a P1-million bounty on his head was captured Saturday by the military during a raid on his hideout in Zamboanga City.
Somebody's buying the beer tonight!
Mohammad Said, reportedly a henchman of Abu Sayyaf leader Isnilon Hapilon, was arrested in Barangay Recodo on the strength of a warrant of arrest issued by the Basilan regional trial court, said Col. Daniel Casabar, commander of "Task Force Zamboanga." Said was captured by a task force from the Army Scout Rangers and military intelligence agents in the morning of Dec. 27. Said used the alias Kaiser Said.
That's a pretty damned boring alias. "Commander Robot" is much more dashing...
Last Dec. 7, troops captured Ghalib Andang, alias Commander Robot, who led an Abu Sayyaf band in snatching 21 mostly European tourists from an island resort off Sabah on Easter Sunday in 2000.
See what I mean? "Commander Robot" -> daring raid. The Abu boyz prob'ly burned through the walls of the resort and came swarming in, knives clutched in their teeth, carrying off wenches and such. Had Kaiser Said run the operation, they'd have come goose-stepping up in tight formation, laid down a barrage of mustard gas, then gone "over the top," with fixed bayonets, and killed everyboyd in sight. Where's the big money in that?
The hostages were held in the jungles of Sulu for almost six months before they were freed in batches after Libya and some of their governments reportedly paid millions of dollars in ransom.
See? The dough was prob'ly paid in gold and jewels, and Commander Robot's boyz buried it in a chest on the beach in a deserted cove on a flyspeck isle in the dead of night, after paying out the graft to the negotiators, of course. But what does all this have to do with Mohammed Said?
After his arrest, the 36-year-old Andang was taken to a military hospital at Edwin Andrews Air Base in Zamboanga City and was later flown to Manila on a military transport plane under heavy security. Andang was confined at V. Luna military hospital in Quezon City, where doctors have amputated his left leg.
"Yar! Now I be Commander Peg-leg Robot! Avast me hearties! Come spring me from this here calaboose!"
Armed Forces spokesman Lt. Col. Daniel Lucero said a major artery in Andang’s left leg had been severed and the limb was removed above the knee after gangrene had set in. "There was no recourse but to amputate it to save his life," he said.
"And to get rid of the smell... Eeewwww! Stinky!"
Col. Rafael Regino, Armed Forces surgeon general, said Andang did not object to the operation to cut off his left leg.
"More giggle juice, Commander Robot?"
"Yersh, shank 'oo!"
"By the way, we're gonna cut off one or two of your legs. Do you mind?"
"'Ash awright..."
"When he woke up, Robot thanked me," he said.
"Yersh. Shanks a heap. Never liked that leg anyway... Shay! Izh there any more giggle juice?"
"I think he gladly received (the outcome of the operation)," which took almost two hours to perform.
"Shay, Nursh? I got up to go to the bashroom an' my leg wudn't there. You sheen it?"
Regino said the government can provide Andang an artificial wooden leg made of yakal, and that his amputated leg will be used for laboratory and pathological tests.
... and target practice.
Roughly, the government has spent around P50,000 to P1 million for Andang’s hospitalization, he added.
"But we're gonna hold the leg for ransom for P1 million, so we should get our money back."
On the other hand, Brig. Gen. Bonifacio Ramos, commander of the Army’s 103rd Infantry Brigade, said even before the arrest of Andang, troops have been tracking down Hapilon and Abu Sayyaf commander Hamsiraji Sali alias Commander Jose Ramirez. Sali was reportedly wounded when troops chanced upon the bandit leader in Upper Kumalarang near the border of Lantawan town, Basilan. Brig. Gen. Alexander Yano, commander of the Army’s 601st Infantry Brigade, said troops backed by intelligence units have also been looking for Abu Sayyaf chieftain Khaddafi Janjalani in Central Mindanao. Janjalani was last monitored in Palembang, Sultan Kudarat, he added.
[Knock knock!]
"Good evening, Madame. We're the 601st Infantry Brigade..."
"Good evening. Won't you come in?"
"Thank you."
"Tea?"
"Yes, thank you. Sergeant Major!"
"Sir!"
"Tell those men to stop messing with the piano. They don't know how to play it!"
"Yessir!"
"Madame, we're searching for Khaddafi Janjalani. Have you seen him?"
"Janjalani? I don't believe I know anyone of that name, Colonel."
"Thank you, Madame. Sergeant Major!"
"Yessir!"
"Form the men up and move them out!"
"Yessir! Here, you men! Careful of that antimaccassar!"
Posted by:Dan Darling

#3  Yakal- Often found behind potted plant after major fraternity keg party.
Posted by: Capsu78   2003-12-29 5:19:23 PM  

#2  I think it's like spackle, only instead of mixing it up with water, you use yak butter.
Posted by: Fred   2003-12-29 2:18:44 PM  

#1  Superior commentary!
By the way what's yakal? As in made of yakal Is it related to Yohimbe?
Posted by: Shipman   2003-12-29 2:07:26 PM  

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