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| -Short Attention Span Theater- |
| A Joke From HiPakistan |
| 2003-10-31 |
| An Army Ranger was on vacation in the depths of Louisiana and he wanted a pair of genuine alligator shoes in the worst way, but was very reluctant to pay the high prices the local vendors were asking. After becoming very frustrated with the âno haggleâ attitude of one of the shopkeepers, the Ranger shouted, âMaybe Iâll just go out and get my own alligator, so I can get a pair of shoes made at a reasonable price!â The vendor said, âBy all means, be my guest. Maybe you will run into a couple of Marines who were in here earlier saying the same thing.â So the Ranger headed into the bayou that same day and a few hours later came upon two men standing waist deep in the water. He thought, âThose must be the two Marines the guy in town was talking about.â Just then, the Ranger saw a tremendously long gator, swimming rapidly underwater towards one of the Marines. Just as the gator was about to attack, the Marine grabbed its neck with both hands and strangled it to death with very little effort. Then both Marines dragged it on shore and flipped it on its back. Lying nearby were several more of the creatures. One of the Marines then exclaimed, âDarn, this one doesnât have any shoes either! Sure they are making fun of Marines, plus they are our enemies and all, but this is funny! (Besides, we want the image of tough Marines in their mind.) |
| Posted by:Sorge |
| #13 SH, regretfully I'm not much of a go-to-guy on Latin America. I'm not trying to be sarcastic but I never thought we had much of a policy worth talking about. The war on drugs has taken a huge backseat to the WOT as is expected. I can only really talk about Mexico and P.R. because I know more about them. I think we've dropped the ball woefully in curbing illegal immigration across our southern border. I think the administration has done a horrible job w/Mexico. I don't know anyone whose up on the Myers visit except the well-educated Rantburg crew here. |
| Posted by: Jarhead 2003-11-1 12:01:27 AM |
| #12 Jarhead, what is your impression of the US Latin American policy? I know Myers visited Columbia recently, but we seem to be distracted to even what is going on in Mexico yet alone Bolivia. |
| Posted by: Super Hose 2003-10-31 4:32:58 PM |
| #11 SH, NGFS is still important for us. Especially for our ANGLICO Units (Air Naval Gunfire Liaison Company). UNITAS is still going on. My old unit did one (I didn't go personally). We call it the carribean cruise. Pappy is correct about Fla being a possible sight. N.C. is the other site outside Lejeune. |
| Posted by: Jarhead 2003-10-31 2:21:45 PM |
| #10 I don't know of any other place where we can practice NGFS. Is that even important capability for you guys anymore? Reportedly the new NGFS sites are or will be in Florida and S. Carolina. Weather and maritime traffic will more of a problem, but it's better than nothing. |
| Posted by: Pappy 2003-10-31 2:10:50 PM |
| #9 Off subject,but has anyone heard of any desertions from troops enjoying well-deserved home leave?I remember small flurry of stories of how hordes of troops were not going to report back,and don't recall any stories since.Surely the press wouldn't be wrong concerning the professionalism,dedication and patriotism of members of American military would it? |
| Posted by: Stephen 2003-10-31 2:04:03 PM |
| #8 Jarhead, we used to shoot a lot of NGFS (Naval Gunfire Support) at Vieques. I know that was an important naval capability for the Marines at one time. I don't recall a situation where naval guns were used in combat since we wasted the Iranian Navy and their oil platforms. I don't know of any other place where we can practice NGFS. Is that even important capability for you guys anymore? When we used to transit through the Caribean, we used to participate in Law Enforcement Operations(LEO ops.) Mostly involved using the radar to track and identify fast-moving, white cigarette boats with all their windows tinted or boarded up. The ship I was on at the time was the USS Dahlgren (DDG-43.) It had no helo so I don't know whether other ships use air assets for LEO ops. I did see a contractor using a blimp out of Roosevelt Roads. It made an excellent place to perform DEA operations at the time. Roosevelt Roads was also the base where we hosted UNITAS cruises - I did one. This in combined naval ops with every South American country that has an appreciable navy. Unitas was about friendship and teamwork with our neighbors; it has probably been discontinued. It would probably be inappropriate to host a friendship summit in Gitmo. Roosevelt Roads has much better naval facilities anyway. As for Castro, any place that we write off in Central America, South America, or the Caribean becomes home court for Fidel - except Haiti evidently. A place is really a shithole when even the Socialists keep the hell away from it. |
| Posted by: Super Hose 2003-10-31 1:54:30 PM |
| #7 SH, appreciate the response. Interesting position on Castro. I had not condsidered that aspect for DEA ops. I was focusing on losing a good training area for combined arms exercises (i.e. naval gunfire, air, and amphib ops). Vieques was good for that. We worked w/U.S. Marshals & FBI in 2000 and threw the protestors off the range. The local Viequans like us but the mainland P.R. want us out so they can put up resorts. Its all politics. The environmental & cancer nonsense from our training there is not true. I know that Rosey still has a squadron or two on there plus some ships. Maybe they can reduce the force and redeploy those assets back mainland U.S. |
| Posted by: Jarhead 2003-10-31 12:33:46 PM |
| #6 Just saw the interview and Brian Lamb was great. Schultz cut most people off that were antagonistic to him and veered into populist themes like teachers are not paid enough, farmers feed the country, and fiscal conservitism like our national debt will cripple our childrens future. Mona Charon followed and really hit the nail on the head when she thought he may need to get a little sense of humor. His most straight forward answer to any question was that the Bush tax cut must be repealed. Sounds like marching orders. |
| Posted by: Lucky 2003-10-31 12:16:26 PM |
| #5 Lol! Brought a smile to my day. |
| Posted by: Charles 2003-10-31 11:52:18 AM |
| #4 Yeah, it's mildly amusing, but it's an oldie. An Italian fellow told me this joke, but the butts are the carabinieri. In that one, they first see the shoes in a shop in rome. On being told that they're crocodile shoes, they go to Egypt to get some. When they fail to find shoes on the crocs, they just sit in their little boat. After a bit, one says, "Why are we doing this again?" "You see those crocodiles sunning themselves on the bank?" "Yes." "Well, sooner or later, one of them is bound to go swimming, and he'll take off his shoes. That's when we grab them!" |
| Posted by: Angie Schultz 2003-10-31 11:32:27 AM |
| #3 I like that one. Jarhead, I saw your question about Roosevelt Roads closing. My take on that base is that while I don't care for the attitude of some people in PR, I am unwilling to back any farther out of Latin America. Castro is in the process of actively and sucessfully subverting Brazil, Bolivia, Venezuala and other governements I'm sure. I am pretty sure that Roosevelt Roads is crtical for DEA ops. This may have all been factored in. I know there is a school of thought that we should quietly watch as the South Americans shake this out among themselves. If this is an active decision, the policy should be monitored for effect. Personally, I don't like the trend. Regardless, I would hope that State and the DOD would pay careful attension to the messsge we send throughout Latin America as we seek to bust a weenie off in the PR backside. |
| Posted by: Super Hose 2003-10-31 10:51:04 AM |
| #2 Jarrinas! Off subject again but just heard that Brian Lamb at C-SPAN will be interviewing the Liberal talk show genie, Schultz, at 8 am PST. |
| Posted by: Lucky 2003-10-31 10:30:43 AM |
| #1 That's a good one...LOL.....we don't take any offense to that stuff. Heck, I'm gonna pass that one on to the lads here at work. Thanx Sorge. |
| Posted by: Jarhead 2003-10-31 10:16:12 AM |