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| Middle East |
| Arafat breakdown: Feared he had been poisoned |
| 2003-09-30 |
| From WORLD TRIBUNE.COM.... Palestinian Authority Chairman Yasser Arafat appears to have recovered from exhaustion. Palestinian sources said Arafat was concerned that he had been poisoned as part of an assassination plot by Israel and the United States. They said that Arafat sent for a medical team from Jordan when his own physicians could not determine his ailment. All of our diagnostic equipment was broken. The funds for repair were encumbered, but were spent on other things, whoops... disregard "He was very tired and alarmed that he had been poisoned," a source said. "After a few days of arrest and a thorough examination, he’s back at work again. The crisis is over." Level 1 of the crisis is over. Proceed to Level 2, please. Over the weekend, Arafat, 74, complained of nausea and canceled virtually all of his meetings. The exception was a brief session with Prime Minister-designate Ahmed Qurei on Monday, Middle East Newsline reported. The absence of Arafat over the weekend sparked rumors that he had been incapacitated by a heart attack. After he completed his tests on Monday, Arafat emerged from PA headquarters in Ramallah smiling. I beat the Grim Reaper this time. It was only exhaustion. No sweatskis! Palestinian sources said Arafat resumed his normal schedule on Tuesday after three days of relative inactivity. The sources said the PA chairman was given a clean bill of health by a team of physicians who arrived from Jordan in an emergency visit on Monday. Local GP’s busy with patching up Hamas rabble. The team of Jordanian physicians arrived by special plane on Monday to examine the PA chairman. The team included leading Jordanian coronary specialist, Yusef Kasus and Arafat’s personal physician, Ashraf Kurdi. The Jordanian team gave Arafat a range of tests and left Ramallah on late Monday. The team was said to have found that Arafat was merely exhausted and was not poisoned. In June, Arafat accused Israel of trying to poison him. Sorry, Arafish, the Poison Ploy™ did not work. Arafat was said to have come under great stress over the last month after he forced the resignation of Prime Minister Mahmoud Abbas and searched for a replacement. Sources said that as early as two weeks ago, Arafat was unable to stand up for more than a minute when meeting Palestinian dignitaries. And it is only going to get tougher... |
| Posted by:Alaska Paul |
| #8 Sprinkle iridium over compound as required, salt to taste........ |
| Posted by: Alaska Paul 2003-9-30 11:03:32 PM |
| #7 " Mr. President, the ray is working on Mr Arafat. " " AraFISH! I will not say his name in respect unless I have too. Now, has he started getting boils from the radiation yet? " " No sir, apparently instead of the boils we predicted, it's going to cause his eyes to slowly melt over the course of a month. " " Excellent, inform the blogs at once. Everything is going according to plan. " |
| Posted by: Charles 2003-9-30 10:35:50 PM |
| #6 Yellow dog, yellow dog, this is Blackjack. Mission successful. The initial test of the ray works. Level two induces extreme fatigue and causes some system slowing. We will begin increasing power at 0.5 levels per day until we have success. Will report as necessary. Blackjack out. |
| Posted by: Old Patriot 2003-9-30 9:26:37 PM |
| #5 "Mr. Tenet? We need your permission to increase the intensity of the Death Ray that is currently focused on Mr. Arafat's compound. Apparently, the current setting wasn't high enough." |
| Posted by: Bomb-a-rama 2003-9-30 6:12:23 PM |
| #4 It's the big one! I'm coming, 'lizabeth! |
| Posted by: BH 2003-9-30 4:48:21 PM |
| #3 Take two 7.65mm pills and a long rest, Yasser... |
| Posted by: mojo 2003-9-30 4:21:35 PM |
| #2 Bad Falafel! Somebody needs to refill the soap dispenser at the Ramallah House of Pancakes! |
| Posted by: Greg 2003-9-30 4:04:15 PM |
| #1 the stress of knowing he's in the crosshairs if one of the "militants" booms anything seeems to disagree with the Arafish...either that or he has Ich |
| Posted by: Frank G 2003-9-30 4:02:26 PM |